Love Without Crown
Marriage (Part 1)
This year I was exactly 27 years old, an age that was enough to build a household, an age that was often the subject of neighbor gossip to be the object of arranged marriages here and there. Last time home, next door neighbor betrothed to a 29-year-old man, after being traced it turned out to be a bit of a mental disorder, of course it makes the family inflamed, it was, the neighbor said that I didn't need much. I'm funny, not married yet because no one wants to but I'm still cool myself.
After parting with zul, I began to learn to make peace with the circumstances, conscious for years trapped in pseudo-satisfaction. I have also apologized to the men I have hurt, of course they were surprised, andri even thought that I was seriously ill who would soon die so as to offer me to be his second wife. Zul, the response is short, maybe the wound in his heart is still gaping and until this moment he is not married when he is almost 32 years old.
I began to enjoy life in peace and quiet, not forgetting psychic therapy to heal trauma or other. A much better life, terbesit sneaking for a time so many years useless alias self-destruct and hurt others.
The sad news came from home, papa died suddenly from a heart attack while jogging, it felt like a dream because just yesterday we met and papa said he wanted to see me married this year, he said, papa enthusiastically talked about his idea of the concept of marriage, to have imagined playing with my children. The last conversation with papa, if you think about it this time turned out to be different from usual, felt very warm and many times papa looked at me carefully, and continued to hug me.
Papa's body was stiffened, the sound of al-qur’an verse was unable to stem the tears, I deliberately left the office seminar, although it took several hours to get home, he said, I'm not too late to look and hug papa's body. Mama was silent beside papa, her gaze was so deep staring at the calm face of papa, not caring about the people around her. I hugged papa tightly, whispering a sentence of love that had been prestige to express it. Imagine how much papa fought so hard for the family, imagine how evil I was as a child. Everyone present was moved and surprised by the sudden news of grief, the first brother could not go home because he was in the Netherlands, if waiting until then the father's body, kasian papa, and my sister is on her way home.
The funeral atmosphere was crowded with people who took papa, whether they were who because mom and sister did not know. The funeral process went well and solemn, one by one people went home, mama still sat beside the grave papa with a loving gaze, I was not able to see it.
“Papa, wait for mama yes, we will be here together.” Mama lirih.
They have prepared the cemetery in advance, want when buried remain side by side.
\\*
One week papa's departure still leaves a lot of grief, mama can already accept the reality of the death of papa and mama began to talk seriously with me about the wishes of papa.
“Diana, before death papa wants you to get married.” Mom started to open the conversation.
“Dian already have a candidate?.” Continue mama.
I just shook my head, confused as well when it was comfortable with the solitude came the request of the parents who to me felt heavy.
“Papa has prepared candidates for you, nak” Mama's eyes look sparkling.
“You can choose between three brands, try walking first.” Firm mom.
“Iya, dear mama!” I replied with an ungodly heart.
\\*
I made a deal with the guy you said he was a colleague of papa's. Meeting at one of the cafes, I came between intention and not intention, dressing up just like that. Seen from a distance a man who was tall, athletic, wearing a gray shirt.
“Hai, dian ya?” Friendly ask.
“Angga yes?” Manya make sure.
“Iya, can I sit?”
“Please”
We felt awkward, gradually melted with increasingly cool chatter, we exchanged stories about work and others, from here I know that he is an architect. It did not feel like an hour of conversation, up to an hour was gone.
“Sorry yes, I want to ask, can?” Angga asked permission.
“You are still a virgin?” Ask.
“Excuse me, I always ask this to my candidate because I don't want it if the zone, I want the same woman who can take care of her.” Angga continued even though I have not responded.
“Although the woman got the act of immoral bad guy?” I'm getting pissed.
“Iya, based on personal experience anyway!”
“Means?” I'm starting to get curious.
“Then, I had my first relationship with a woman, after that she said that I was not the first man for her, really no zonk? I'm the first time with him, whether he's the same how many men.” Angga replied with an annoyed face.
“Lah... if so zonk dong virgin who dapetin you, you've never!!” I'm getting pissed.
“If men don't look, dian!” He defended himself.
"Let me know, so be kind to you!!"
I felt very upset by the prideful behavior, it felt like I wanted to throw a glass in his face, a man who does not know himself. I just backed off, other than being unqualified, I didn't like his mindset. Pretending there was a need, I went home cursing along the way, O God, what kind of a creature is that a bug? Want me to squeeze his brain that was somehow put where.
Mama asked, I said it didn't fit. Not mama if not desperate, there are still two more men, even mama has prepared five spare men, children of friends arisan mama. I just follow the plot, if it doesn't fit. Mama immediately arranged a meeting for the second man, on the same day I met Angga.
The bespectacled man was sitting in a tense state in front of me, he seemed salting, apparently because the first meeting with or indeed had never before been seja with a woman. I opened the topic of chat, he was passive, it felt boring if I asked him continue.
“You want to drink again?” Ask if it's not wrong has been asked ten times.
“Gak, mas” I replied with a smile even though I wanted to curse.
“I..emm... i.” he said stammering.
“I why?”
“You are beautiful, but you are not my type because it is too modern, I do not like to have a rich current wife, make extravagant!”
“Mas Elman, you're not really my type at alliiiii, you're just asking for another drink no, that's ten times already huh. After all, anyone who wants the same, too colossal for in the modern era.” I said while leaving him who was surprised, relieved can also vent pent-up irritation.
\\*
The match failed again, the spirit of the mother was burning. Even every day there was a man who offered me, so I was annoyed at being laughed at by emi who was an office friend. There is still one man papa's choice that has not been met with me, mama said that the man refused, well what are these who have dared to refuse before seeing. But, the bodo’ period because I did not want to get married. After all, I am not sure about their choice, zonk is not funny anymore, what kind of quality is God until I am met with magical creatures that I want to capture.
[Next break you must go home, finish the matchmaking business, mama will send your friends to help find prospective ghosts!!] Mom's voice boomed at the end of the phone.
[Mammm, not all advertising in the newspaper or social media??] My response was very angry.
[Good ideasss!!]
[Mamaaaaaaaaaaaaa..!].