My Ustadz My Husband
The Part 87

Bilal hung up the phone and he looked very tense.The worry was clearly on his face.

He rushed to Asma's room and found his wife was tidying up her wardrobe.

Bilal can only stand sculpting making Asthma who realized his presence was confused.

"What's wrong?" Ask Asma.

"Khadija...He entered the hospital again" Asma was also very surprised by the news.

"So..." Asma closed the door of her closet and walked towards Bilal who was still standing in the doorway. "You'd better go home, Bilal. He must need you right now"

Bilal immediately stroked Astma's cheek with his right hand and looked at the clingy Asthma

"I have to go home, Zahra. But that doesn't mean I'll leave you, I will definitely return" Asma could only nod and try to understand.

"I'm sorry, honey"

"What the hell" Asma answered while hugging Bilal. "She's also your wife, and she needs you" Asma whispered. Bilal returned Asthma's embrace and kissed Asthma long enough.

"You really don't want to come?" Bilal and Asma immediately shook their heads. "Well, what's wrong. I'll come back later here" Asma replied with a nod.

Adil decides to take Bilal home, since it is impossible for Bilal to come home alone in this condition, they all worry about Bilal.

Bilal says goodbye to his in-laws.

"May Khadijah be well, son" cried his mother-in-law.

"Thank you, Ummi. Thank you for your prayer"

"Send my regards to her"

"God willing."

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Bilal and Adil went straight to the hospital. There was Hubab and Bilal's mother waiting. Umm Mufar was very happy to see his son back and he was in much better shape than the last time he saw him.

Umm Mufar hugged Bilal.

"How is Khadijah, Ummi?" Bilal asked as he broke his embrace from his mother. Umm Mufar was unable to say a word and only a look of worry appeared on his face.

"He's waiting for you inside" he said.

Bilal came in and he took Adil.

Seeing the arrival of her husband, Khadijah who was lying weak immediately smiled happily. He also greeted Adil and asked.

"Where's Asthma?"

"He's..."

"He can't come yet, Khadija" Bilal interrupted Fair immediately. Khadijah looked sad to hear that.

"How are you doing, Khadijah?" Fair asked.

"Come" answered Khadijah with reddened eyes. "I was hoping Asthma would come along"

"He's not ready, I hope you understand" Adil said.

"I just wanted to apologize to her in person, before I..."

"What will happen" Bilal immediately cut off Khadijah's talks. He held his wife's hand, "You'll be fine, Khadijah."

Khadijah only smiled faintly because he knew he could not last much longer. He couldn't stand all the pain. Khadijah cried and Bilal wiped away his tears.

"Don't cry" Bilal kissed Khadijah's forehead fondly "Strengthen yourself, all this time you can always defend and fight your pain, so now you can"

"It's really torturing me, Mas" Khadijah said with tears "I want to be relieved of this pain"

"Shhttt... Don't say that, honey." Bilal hugged Khadijah.

"Bilal, I'll stay at the hotel, tomorrow morning I have to go back"

"What do you mean at the hotel?" Bilal asked, "Stay at Ummi's house, because there are no people in my house. Or if you want to stay at Zahra's house can also be"

"Stay in my house only, Dil" continued Umm Mufar "There is Mukhlis, so you are not alone. " Just hesitated and hesitated. But Bilal again persuaded him, what else Adil is his brother-in-law.

Finally fair will.

"Sorry, Bilal has troubled you" Umm Mufar said.

"What what does. Bilal is my family"

"How's your sister doing, son"

"Asma's fine"

"Ummi misses her" Adil only replied to her sister's in-laws with a smile.

"Ummi just go home with Adil, let me and Hubab take care of Khadijah"

"Yes" answered her mother then she took Adil with her.

"Thank you" Khadijah smiled at her weak smile.

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Bilal went to see Doctor Fina and asked how Khadija could drop again, because after undergoing chemo he showed very good progress.

"Since you were in an accident, he never paid attention to himself, making his condition worse, he was also like depressed and it made things worse.

I've asked her to take care of herself, but she seems to want to give up."

Bilal was very sad to hear Doctor Fina's explanation. During this time he and Khadijah equally fought hard and did everything for the healing of Khadijah.

"How could he want to give up so easily after all the effort we put in" Bilal said sadly

"He's in pain, Bilal. I know it's hard for you guys, but I don't think he can hold out much longer"

"If you go through chemo again?"

"It's free, the drug will damage his internal organs if it continues to be forced. And he'll be even more tormented" Bilal bowed helplessly.

Bilal met Khadijah in his ward. Bilal looked disappointed at Khadijah who did not want to fight anymore to live. Khadijah knew the meaning of the gaze, yet he still smiled and extended his hand to Bilal. Bilal reluctantly accepts her and she looks angry.

"We've been trying so hard all this time, why do you want to give up so easily, Khadija?"

"Sorry" Khadijah still stretched out his hand and Bilal welcomed him. "Not that I gave up, but it's possible to survive. I hope you will explain me, Mas" Bilal shook his head sadly. "I beg you, all this time I've been tormented by this disease, the taste is very painful"

"What can I do to ease your pain, honey?" Bilal stroked Khadijah's cheek. He could not bear to see his wife in this condition.

"I only want two things before I die, Mom. Ridho from my husband, and sorry from my honey"

"He'll forgive you, stop thinking about the past"

"I don't want to carry the burden of this guilt, Mas. This guilty feeling hurts more than any cancer I've ever had"

Bilal looked at Khadijah with a very sad look with eyes that began to look glass, he kissed his wife's hand many times

"You want to talk to her? I can call Zahra" Khadijah shook his head

"He doesn't want to talk to me" Khadija said in a low voice.

"Well, you better rest now. I'm sure everything's gonna be okay"

Khadijah could only smile at the words Bilal always said whenever Khadijah was sick.

Everything's gonna be okay.

Bilal always supported her, gave her spirit and was always there when she needed him.

Khadijah is grateful for what he has so far. And Bilal is the most valuable in his life. Bilal never left her, and always loved her.

And if he has to die, he's ready. But there's still one thing he wants before he dies. Sorry about the honey.

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Bilal always accompanied Khadija and gave her whatever she asked for. Bilal took care of him and continued to give him encouragement to survive and convince Khadijah that everything would be fine.

And every day, Khadijah would always ask Asma, making Bilal unbearable. Bilal knows his wife, she's a good woman, and she won't calm down until Asma forgives her.

Bilal tried to persuade Asma to talk to Khadijah, but Asma always gave the same answer.

He's not ready yet.

Asthma can forget all her pain, but not the loss of her child.

In each of his prostrations Bilal always prayed for the recovery of his first wife, and also he prayed that Asma could open his heart to Khadijah.

After performing the prayer, Bilal sat beside Khadijah and he read the Quran calmly.

"Mas.." call Khadijah while patting Bilal's arm.

"Yes, Honey. Why?" Bilal asked as he closed his mushaf and put it on the table.

"Bring me out, I want a breath of fresh air. It feels stuffy here" Pinta Khadijah.

"Yes, wait a minute, I call Hubab first"

Bilal who still has to use a stick certainly can not take care of Khadija alone. Both are equally weak at the moment. Hubab was always there for them.

And incidentally, Hubab had just come with some food for Bilal.

Bilal asked Hubab to take Khadijah out in a wheelchair because Khadijah was very weak at the moment.

Hubab would gladly comply with her sister's request.

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Tbc...