Reflections
Waking Up and Lamenting Defeat

I know—not—even everyone knows that being a princess or a leader is not an easy thing. Although it looks fun because we can live with the abundance of treasure, but behind it, there is a lot of gloom that we try to hide.

As a princess and also a general, of course, I have a great responsibility to safeguard the safety of my people, my people, and my kingdom. Doing it, of course, is not as easy as turning the palm of the hand. There are many sacrifices I have to make for those I love.

Not that I'm not sincere, it's just .. Am I wrong if sometimes I still want freedom? Can't I just be selfish once and let go of all this responsibility?

However, it was only a thought that might never materialize in my entire life. After all, I have accepted my fate and responsibility. I also love them with all my heart.

They gave me spirit. They love me like I love them. With this, everything becomes easier.—ya, although I also know if there are people who hate me.

I love peace even though it is the other side of me, sometimes whispering to my other self. He said there would be chaos, destruction, darkness, slaughter, and all the other bad things. This is my dark side—people call her the Goddess of Death ~ MONSTER!

Sometimes I hate this evil side of me. I wanted to fight him, but doing so, as if making me this strong, became powerless. The only thing I can do is hold it back, so that the other side of this evil, can't control me.

To be honest, even war was something I feared. Because I'm afraid of disappointing a lot of people. I'm afraid they'll hate me for this. I fear my enemies will take away everything I love.

I am afraid of defeat.

But once again, the other side of me whispered and gave me strength and courage. At the very least, I should be optimistic and set a good example for my knights and people.

Doubt is a great enemy to a knight. Therefore, I also fought him, until now, I managed to conquer him.

I am not a perfect human being. But at least, I was able to overcome that imperfection.

I am not a man without weaknesses. But at least I can overcome those weaknesses.

Oh—I remember what happened. The battle with that empire, gave us all a lot of amazing things.

It's about the real me.

It's about the empire and the mysterious cause of war.

It's about family.

It's about brotherhood.

It's about togetherness and solidarity.

Maybe .., this is also about Chen Li who, all this time, loved me. However, it has fallen. He sacrificed for me. But at least, we are proud of him and he is proud of himself, who has fallen as a warrior—hero of a nation that will be remembered.

Damn, I'm weak. Their weapons, as if sucking my power. I also had trouble recovering my strength.

Although I can use qi and mana, but it is not an easy thing. In a weak condition, my body could be threatened if it overdoes it. Unfortunately, under these conditions, they attacked instead.

In the end, me and the others kept fighting, even though we needed to rest.

Sometimes, I hate to be such a strong ass like this—namum, it's really my forte. At least, I don't want to look weak and disappoint those who trust me.

Ah, yes— I understand, there is something behind all this. These are all, definitely the plans of the imperial side. They have weakened the Great General, and I remain their only obstacle to victory.

They also realized that it was not that easy to beat me. Therefore, they also prepared a plan.

Now, I realize it. But it's too late, because I've felt the effects. They managed to paralyze me. Druggingku—they do.

I fell—looked helpless. Isn't that sad?

My people, this princess you are proud of has fallen. Did I disappoint you guys?

My knight, this general you exalted has fallen. Did I disappoint you guys?

This extraordinarily powerful Constantine has fallen. Now, what am I supposed to do? Do I ... just have to wake up, then lament defeat?

But I don't want to be a loser.