Reflections
The Memory Stored

That memory of a dozen years ago, it still feels fresh in my memory. This was the beginning, regarding how I could be interested in him. Whereas, back then, I myself was only four years old; and we were one age.

At the time, I was enjoying my time alone. Ah—enjoy? This has even become my habit which has always been ostracized.

I glanced at the blue sky inside. I let both my feet sink in a shallow pond that is inhabited by many small fish, as well as lotus plants. Back then, I was completely immersed in my own daydream.

"Why be alone here?" The question surprised me.

I looked back, then found the whereabouts of a girl my age. I was stunned, because .. This is the first time anyone has greeted me.

"Why? I like it like this" I replied. He, then moved from his stand, then took a sitting position to my right.

He smiled very sweetly. I who saw it was speechless and could only highlight it closely. This is the first time a child has ever played with a cursed child like me.

"I'm just worried about you. I see, the princes and princesses there ignore you. You see gloom in your solitude" he said.

"I just want to be alone" I said, shaking my head.

"You have friends?" That question really stupefied me. Why would he ask that?

"No" I answered, without hesitation.

"I also have no friends from among the nobles. They're so fake. In the palace, my brothers and sisters, even called me a strange girl because of my different behavior with children in general," he said. "What if I like to read? Let's just say they envy my genius who read well at the age of three. In fact, I was able to digest my reading well when the other princesses and princes could only outwit like that" he lamented.

This time, I scratched my non-itchy nape. This time I had a friend who had the same hobby as me.

In retrospect, everyone in the palace knew about my incredible intelligence. But they closed their eyes because of my status which they considered low; also the physical abnormalities that I had.

"Stay ...!" I said.

"Why?" tannya

"I brought a curse."

"Curse? Whatchu mean?" He frowned and looked at me confused.

"See my face?"

"Shut the mask off partially? Why why?" He moved his hand, tried to touch my mask, but I immediately brushed it off violently.

"That's because I'm ugly. There are scales on some of my face. People were disgusted to see it—that's why I covered it with a mask," I said.

"I think because you're a shy person," he said. "But I think you're very handsome even if your face is only partially visible" he continued. He looked at me with his pair of sparkling eyes.

"Your face is flushed. Are you sick?" tanyakanya. I responded with a slug. "What do you think because of my words? Ah, yes! You must have misbehaved because I praised you handsome!" he said, on target.

I exhaled a long breath. This girl .. so chatty. I was the first time I faced someone like him.

"Don't be noisy!"

"offended? Ah—this is the first time I feel like I have a friend. I'm too happy about it and I'm saying a lot of things that don't matter to you. Oh, yep! We haven't gotten acquainted. My name is Constantine Yang. Your name?"

I didn't hear it and left. At that time, I somehow felt unable to deal with it anymore. My heart .. it felt like it was pounding so hard without me knowing the cause.

Ever since that meeting, I've been watching him secretly whenever I get a chance. Usually, meetings between kingdoms are done at least once a month and these are times that can be used.

Time keeps passing. She grew up to be a beautiful girl. I'mwatching. The longer, he became a figure who is increasingly irritable and dominant. In addition, he also always looks prominent with intelligence, charm, and strength that is different from girls in general.

But behind that, I know he was several times—or maybe often—cries alone while staring at the night sky. I knew it and at that time, I would look up at the same sky as him.

At least, I understand how the burden he feels. Because I feel it too. Because, although I am not really considered a prince, but in fact, I am still always restrained by the rules of the nobles.

I also understand that he often feels lonely.

Then, in the end, I began to realize what this thing called. Falling in love, I really love her. No matter how many times and how hard I tried to shake off the feeling, but in the end, it made my feelings for her grow deeper. The roots are not weakening, but they are getting stronger.

Unfortunately, after I managed to understand my own feelings, I was unable to see him again at the royal meeting.

The first reason, because from what I heard, Constantine's mother died. She ..., must have been very sad, then chose to spend her time alone. The second reason, because he joined the military and was preoccupied by it. He ..., must be very eager to prove his ability and do not want to be underestimated.

Everything Constantine did, to be honest, made me love him even more. I ... fell into his charm.

I also decided to keep the feeling, even though sometimes, it hurt me.

The last time I saw him was back then, the day the conflict arose. The Anming Empire and the Anming Kingdom were at war. I myself ... do not know exactly what the reason is. But I'm pretty sure there's something veiled behind this. Ayahanda ..., must be hiding something or a lot of things behind this.

I haven't seen him in a long time either.

It's been too long since our first conversation.

I miss him and wait for the moments where we can get closer. Yeah, even though sometimes, I feel like I have no hope for that.

But right now, I feel like things are about to change and something big is about to happen. No. .., what is this hunch?!