You Forgot Me Your Queen
Failing Feelings

Today I intend not to go to the store, let it be. Let Atikah my employees who take care of everything, because by chance today also my Mother-in-law and Maya Mas Hendri's sister will come to see me. I know that because Maya had already called earlier that they would both come here.

They decided to visit May and Reyhan. Though I also already know, surely they will discuss Mas Hendri and also me of course.

I prepared everything to welcome them, prepared various snacks, and cooked meals for our lunch together. While May is playing at the neighbor's house, exactly next door. And big Reyhan's still at his school. I am so grateful that I was given the opportunity to have children as obedient and obedient as the two of them. What is the dream of not having such a descendant?

After I finish preparing everything. The sound of my gate moving. Looks like someone's coming in. And maybe it's Mom and Maya who have arrived. I immediately opened the door before my mother-in-law and sister-in-law knocked on it.

It turned out that right when I opened the door, three pairs of eyeballs were heading towards me. And one of the owners is my little girl who's been flanked by her grandmother and her aunt. I smiled at Mom and Maya. Dear God, I am so happy to see those who care so much about me, until they come to visit me.

"Mother" I said, smiling sweetly at her. I shook that powerful hand with reverence. Mother replied to me with her warm embrace.

Then I led them in, and I chose the sofa for our conversation this time. I allowed the different generations of women in front of me to sit down.

"Mother, just what does Maya want to drink?" ask me gently.

"Mother water only Kal." Reply Mother.

"I'm not hard Mba, it'll be easy for me to take it myself." Maya chimed. I nodded, then went to the kitchen to get the water my in-laws had asked for.

"Please ma'am." I said while thrusting a clear glass of water to him.

"Ma... May oruk." said spoiled my daughter by yawning, it seems she could not bear to take a nap soon.

"May want bobo? " my question, while wiping his curly hair. He just nodded then rubbed his eyes which started to turn red.

"Yaudah Kal, sleepin May first, I'm the same Maya wait here." Mother said to me. He rubbed May's head with a pity.

"All right, ma'am, wait a minute. This is her little girl Nda can't stand it either." I said with a chuckle.

I took May to her room. After washing feet and so on. I immediately put her tiny body on the bed. I chanted his favorite sleep carrier sholawat. And it didn't take long for her beautiful eyes to close. I kissed her forehead first, then woke up cautiously afraid she would wake up again because of my movements.

After that I immediately stepped back to meet Mom and Maya. As soon as I sat down, Mom asked me.

"You're healthy Kal? " tanyanya while patting my shoulder slowly.

I nodded and smiled at him.

"Open Mbak Kalisa seems a bit high, Mbak sick? " typal Maya commented on my situation.

I shook weakly.

"I'm not papa ma'am, Sya."

Convince them that I'm okay. My physical is okay, right? The sick is my heart.

"True ma'am, Kalisa's healthy." I replied.

"Don't hide it again Kalisa, what's the matter?" ask Mom to me. His old eyes looked at me with pity.

The deg!

I looked down, I was confused. Should I tell my mother and sister-in-law everything. Should they know about my problem with Mas Hendri?

It also hurts when you have to hold this alone.

I crumpled my fingers, the feeling of not being care had re-emerged. Finally my tears flowed again. But I immediately swiped back. I don't want these two women to think anything no-no about me. I can handle this feeling myself. You can Kalisa.

'Oh my God, I am strong. I'm not weak, please don't make me like this' I murmured inwardly.

"Kal." call Mom.

I looked up at him, I saw there was a hint of disappointment on his face. I don't know why I don't know either.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry" she said weakly.

"I'm sorry Mom failed to educate Mom's son, I'm sorry Mom couldn't make him a good man for you Kalisa. Until now you and your children are victims, this is all the fault of Mother Kal." continued Mother. She looked down, while Maya was silent in a thousand languages and could only wipe her mother's old back.

I looked up, looked up at my in-laws, I saw that Mom's eyes were wet too. And let me know, I already know, and this must be from Mas Hendri or from my neighbors.

I shook my head, my tears were also pouring, right! Not because of my pain, but because I saw my Mother-in-law crying because she had failed to educate her son.

'Oh my God.

I'm stabilizing the heart.

"Kalisa doesn't papa ma'am, Kalisa can accept all this, this is Kalisa's destiny. And everything has nothing to do with Mom. Kalisa please believe in Kalisa, that Kalisa can get through this." I said with a trembling voice holding back haru, because I cared so much for my Mother-in-law.

'Look, I'm not the only one disappointed, you see! The person who has given birth and raised you also feels like they have failed'

Finally Mom hugged me, and I returned her embrace, a hug that always warmed up and felt comfortable. The hug they always need in every circumstance, the embrace of a loved one. Mother ❤

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Mbak Kal ❤