Your name is Secret
Hope Dupus

It has been 2 weeks that Niken did not find his father at home and his mother always reasoned papa there is a job outside the city if Niken asked the most handsome person in their family. The unsuspecting Niken only considers the departure papa ordinary and pure because of work. Not because it's running like it's happening right now.

"Niken, forgive us son, it seems you can not continue college, your education savings money is also drained. Forgive us, son." Mama Niken is crying again. Niken could only hug her mother and gently rub the back of the woman who owned the door.

"Ma, don't think about my college, the important thing is that you're healthy, you're strong, we can definitely get through this. I have no intention of going to college, I want to join the Goddess bude, learn dress design." Whether you can think of where, Niken suddenly triggered the sentence to calm his mother.

"Don't lie Nik mama already know from Juna if you list college major in psychology."

Niken was silent for a moment to think of reasons that could be accepted by his mother.

"I haven't registered ma, anyways I'm not sure my brain is capable. I also came yesterday bude Dewi and asked about the design of clothes. Mama don't have to worry about my college, I don't want to go to college, want to learn dress design just like bude." Niken's explanation actually makes her mother look more in Niken's eyes. His eyes were getting dewy and ready to spill back.

Niken wiped away her mother's tears even though she herself sobbed. Never did Niken think that what became his mother's cry was not about the money lost but instead because her mother felt guilty for not being able to send Niken to a higher level.

Niken returned to her room after convincing her mother she didn't need to go to college. Although his mother repeatedly apologized for the conditions they are experiencing at this time and had an impact on the cessation of Niken's dream but Niken did not give up so that his mother believed, Niken did not need to go to college.

As soon as he entered the room and closed the door, Niken's body immediately decayed and Niken cried sobbing. All the dreams that Niken yearned for were lost in one blink of an eye. All Niken has prepared carefully and Niken must let it all disappear.

It's a lie that Niken says she's not interested in going to college.

Lying if Niken says he has come to Dewi bude to learn the design of clothes.

It's a lie that Niken says she hasn't enrolled in her dream psychology major yet.

Lying, it's all lies.

Dream Niken high and Niken must withstand tightness in the chest when reassuring mama everything will be fine. His heart is not fine but Niken is sure this pain will definitely disappear as time passes. Niken just needs to learn to accept that things are no longer the same.

Niken moved from her knee-bending position and approached the study table. Open the sheets of paper that Niken store neatly in the map and in the pile of the bottom book. Niken stared at the papers with a pushy look.

Niken has met the requirements needed, Niken has filled out all the forms needed and Juna is the witness. Niken just did not expect Juna had said Niken's plan to his mother to make his mother think.

With trembling hands, Niken grabbed the scissors on the table and cut them off one by one. Niken wanted to burn the sheet but there were no matches in Niken's room and Niken refused to leave the room to look in the kitchen. Niken was afraid to meet her mother and her mother would know her eyes because she was crying again.

Niken again sobbed when all the sheets of requirements to enter the psychology major it had become a fine piece of paper. He collected the trash and threw it into a mini trash can in his room.

This way Niken hopes his mother will not know that all this time Niken has struggled to be able to study in the major of his dreams. Niken will also tell Juna about his problem and warn me not to talk about lectures again to his mother.

***

"Pupus is hoping to be a doctor of the soul" Marcel said.

"Until now grandma does not know yes ma if actually mama learned the place of Oma Dewi because of economic factors?" ask Marsya who was answered by Niken.

"Grandmother knows yes mama likes design, especially mama managed to live independently from the work of the dress design." Niken gave an explanation that made her son nod in understanding.

Niken's story continues even this morning. After breakfast and the husband left for work, the children were sitting quietly, waiting for their mother to continue the story of her mother's youth. Moreover, they have been working together so that the homework is quickly completed.

The school is on holiday because of the red date, while their father still left for work because suddenly got a call there are items that are late and just arrived today. The opportunity was not wasted by Marsya and Marcel. The agreement that their father did not know the story of his mother is still valid until now makes Marsya and Marcel often steal time in order to hear the continuation of the story of his mother.

"So Ma, after mom decided not to go to college, what happened next?" ask Marcel while snacking on pop corn. It was her intention to listen to her mother's story while snacking.

Niken stared blankly at the television that was in front of her, "After that-"

***

Niken came to Bude Dewi the next day to express his intention to learn the design of clothes. Bude Dewi is the sister of his father aka Rumila's sister-in-law, Mama Niken. Bude Dewi has a small boutique specifically for wedding clothes and a convection. His efforts were quite successful and able to lift their family from poverty.

Dewi Bude house is not far from the house of Niken and only takes 5 minutes by foot. Niken visited the house bude Dewi right at lunchtime so as not to disturb the bude Dewi watching the employees. Once there, it is true that the Bude Dewi workspace is quiet, the employees who are mostly taken from the surrounding environment are returning home to each other for lunch and will return later at 2.

"Tumben Rumila's girl played here? Lunch yet? Here you eat." Bude Dewi welcomes the friendly arrival of the ponakan.

"Udah eat me kok De, want to come here was eat first." Niken also said no less friendly than his famous good-natured bude.

Niken chatted for a while with his bude while accompanying his bud for lunch. After making small talk, Niken expressed his desire to learn the design of clothes and budenya was willing to teach him.

"Are you sure you want to study here, Nik?"

"Yakin De" said Niken, nodding his head.

"Bude has been horrified about your father, Bude also hopes you are serious about learning so that later you can help your family's economy or at least can reduce the burden of parents by living independently. Later if you have pinter mengedesain clothes and already can bude loose, you will bude recommend to the bude tea boutique in the city, the salary there is big." Niken smiled happy to hear the plan and advice that was said budenya. His bud words add to the spirit of the spirit in Niken.

One problem has been solved, Niken is increasingly convinced to stop his old dream and pursue a new dream. His dream is to help the family economy.