Don't Call Me Fat
Pamite.
I held my son's hand all day. I choose to spend time in the hospital. If I go back to my homeland I will face a fate that I fear. To belong to someone else. People I don't like. Did I just run away? but I have nothing to do if I leave.
"My little sister is big, grown up, stop crying, I want to see you smile, I miss your laughter, everything will be fine, everything that happens there must be wisdom" exclaim the son while stroking my head.
Mom was crying seeing her son talk like that.
"Just pray my operation will be successful" he exclaimed.
I'm nodding.
These 3 precious days I spent in the hospital. I went back to the hotel just to shower and shop for food outside. I have no reason to walk abroad anymore, my goal is not that.
In the supermarket I accidentally hit someone.
"You? his step-sister's a son, right?" an Indonesian woman he knew.
"Claras? why are you here?" ask me.
"I'm in college here" she replied.
"What a coincidence well, you must know the son is sick right?" exclaim me.
Clara looked surprised.
"What's? your point? sick son? where's where?" clara just leaned on me with a lot of questions.
I had to explain the details to him.
"Astagfirefull!" her screeches.
"We really don't know?" ask me to make sure.
Clara nodded quickly.
"What college are you in here?" ask me.
"In Indonesia you can, why get out of the country" I exclaimed.
"Everyone has the right to decide where he wants to go to college, right?!" clara was getting uncomfortable with my question.
"Yes, yes, I have to go back to the hospital" I said.
I thought Clara would hold me back and wanted to come see the son but I was wrong, clara just left a prayer for the son.
Out of the supermarket the cold air instantly burst into my body, as her clothes were less thick.
Clara looked at the back that was slowly walking away.
I bought some bread and some necessities for mama and son.
I've been in Germany for a week. You broke papa's rule that wanted me only 3 days there. Of course he scolded me. Today is the son's schedule for the operation.
Papa wants me to go home now or I'll be a bum if I don't follow his will.
Want to not want me to leave immediately and go home without being able to accompany the son of the operation.
"I'm saying yes. I'm sorry I can't stay here long, papa's been waiting for me" I exclaimed to the son. It's sad but I don't have a choice. I also paid my mom.
With a sagging step I slowly left the hospital.
Go back to the hotel to pick up the stuff I've been packing in my suitcase since last night.
I look at this country again. It's my first time to Germany, really there's no way at all except to the hospital, restaurant or supermarket. Time spent in the hospital with my son.
Maybe this is the last time I see him as the one I love, tomorrow I have to think of him as my big brother, heavy but we do have to part ways.
My tears came out again. My destiny is waiting in my hometown.
Sorry up his little, the author's hand hit by the glass. really sick in the use of typing. 🙏