Give me back my son
Consultation

"You don't want to meet Sean? He's asleep." Mas Akbar said, approaching me who was sitting on the sofa room. Ever since Sean came, I've moved to sleep on the couch, while Sean's in bed. He refused to sleep with me or close to me. "Please say good night. I've read, if children are whispered every sleep good things will be embedded in his subconscious. Hopefully, Sean can get back close to you."

"No need. I'm still not stable. Emotions have not yet come down. Let me be alone first "I said, while throwing my face away from Akbar.

"Don't you miss Sean?"

"Lost, but how else, the boy didn't miss me. Not even feeling my love. We are like two strangers. I'm with myself, he's with her." I said. "If I approach, see for yourself, right? She screamed hysterically.It was like a frightened person. Like I'm a criminal. But how else, like it was implanted in him since he was a child, so he knew I was a bad person!" My eyes started to glaze over.

Suddenly he hugged me from behind. Apparently he knew that my heart was still not calm. That's why he let me sob. "So, he'll definitely be the one who loves you the most, baby." I said.

"When? I'm tired of waiting!" I said.

"Patience yes. I will always try to help you."

Again I can only make a burden for Akbar mas. Yesterday when I went to the pediatrician, I went with my aunt Vienna to do a medical check-up on Sean finally had to give up. Just until the hospital I had to call Akbar mas. He finally came forward to persuade Sean to obey. As a result, he ended up being quiet as well even though I couldn't get close to him. That kid was really anti on me who had a blood relationship with him. The influence of Dira is incredible.

"Tomorrow I want to go to a psychologist." I said. "I want a consultation. It feels very uncomfortable. Being treated like this by Sean makes it hard for me to eat, good emotions come down and my heart is worried." I said.

"alright. Do what you think is good, baby. Do you want company tomorrow?"

"No need. I'm consul to my friend." I said. Mas Akbar nodded. Even so he still offered if there was anything immediately contact him.

***

"You're just down, you better learn to accept everything sincerely, Yan. There is no harm if you give up. Take one step back to take ten steps forward. Try to call him by a name he knows, not one he hates. Slowly touch his heart. Who knows, his heart will melt. Your son is like a white paper. Don't let too many scribbles. If you continue to force it, it will be full of nis or even Sobel." Advice from Ms. Mira, one of the seniors and friends I know because we are alma mater. He counseled me a lot according to his field as a psychologist.

Single-minded? Really hard. I have to win over Dira's brother when he has kidnapped my son! My chest's tight. But as Ms. Mira said, I had no choice but to try. Sean's heart was already too unhappy with his own name.

"Please Yan. And don't forget to pray for Sean. He'll definitely come back to you." Advice from Mira again.

***

Car luggage was full of toys and food I bought. When I got home, I went straight to the orphanage. It's bad to bring souvenirs for the kids. When they saw me with that much luggage, they immediately scattered happily to welcome food and toys.

"Darling, why is it still there. Come here!" I said to Sean who was still silently pecking at where he originally stood when I came. "Aci ... Original!" Call me. It's so heavy, God. It hurts to call by another name. I wanted to cry but was replaced with a smile when the boy suddenly walked towards me. He came to me. Fulfilling my calling.

"Thank you." Sean said as he took the toy from my hand. Then he joined the other kids. Playing with jokes. An attitude that is actually very simple but managed to catapult my heart. All the grief was gone for a moment. I really feel like I'm the happiest human being in the conspiracy of seconds.

Yes Rabb .. The sadness, disappointment and anger that were present now changed with happiness. Although a glimmer but can treat sahara in the heart that is so barren. My son said thank you to me. Alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah.

"Don't like the game?" I said to the boy next to Sean. He nodded his head. Then I switched to Sean. I purposely didn't go straight to him to give him comfort. So that he does not feel I am too chasing after him even though the reality is so. "What toys do you want to buy?" I asked Sean.

"Biss. Big bus!" Sean said enthusiastically. He showed with both hands how big a bus he wanted. Throughout him.

"Well, that's a long bus." I said.

"Yes. All that time!" Said again. Still showing both hands.

"Biss? Which color is what?" I replied no less enthusiastic. Following Sean's wishes. Against him speaking in order to bring our relationship closer.

"Red." He said, pointing at his clothes that were indeed red. "Adli likes red."

"Oh yes, fine. InshaAllah tomorrow we buy a red bus. But I don't know what Adli likes. Later if Adli whirls himself how not to be wrong, because in his shop there are many red bus toys. Mama's worried about choosing the wrong color."

"Yes, Adli will come!" Said. He was busy playing with his friends.

Now I can smile happily because Sean wants to communicate with me. She also called me Mama. Something that makes my heart flower. I was so happy that I sent a lot of messages to Akbar. Can't wait for him to come home and see our closeness.

[Later to celebrate this, we will take the children to eat.] Word. Mas Akbar's. He also promised to go home early.

"Aunti thank you very much!" I said to Viennese aunt who was one of my advisers. He always reminded me to give up even though I was stubborn before. The Viennese aunt who had been observing me from the beginning was just smiling with teary eyes. Because he was afraid he could not say anything.