I LOVE YOU, ABOUT ODY
It's my fault

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🌸Pov Nada🌸

After the death of the doctor who examined me, this hospital room felt lonely.At first I thought God would ask a lot about my pregnancy, it did not happen at all. He did keep me company, took care of me, but it was not at all about this baby.

I don't know what he's thinking about me right now,,,, I don't know,,,

"It's been strong to go home yet?" her tan gently broke the silence.

I'm nodding. Actually I even feel awkward being spoken to gently like this by him. Our habits are like a cartoon series cat and dog favorite of the child, for me more free expression.

If he's this gentle, I feel weird.

"Relatedly? You still lemes so. Do not force it if it is not strong. Staying here for two nights is fine too. What is clear is that you get the best treatment." she said later.

"No. I better just go home. I miss my pillow roll and my bed." I tried to be funny but it didn't seem funny at all.

The gods did not laugh or protest at all. His face is serious. Usually he would nag me if I refused anything he told me. He will also definitely protest because the bolster pillow and mattress I mean is also not mine but rather the innate from the boarding room facility which incidentally is his. But this time it wasn't so.

"Alright if that's what you want. Just wait here. I'll go and take care of his administration. Not long." he said as if knowing that I was afraid of being left behind.

"Mmm, but I don't have enough money to pay for the hospital. How about, uh,,"

"I paid for it. I'm the one who made you fuck."

The god cut me off and he smiled. That smile instantly gave me an answer to his strangeness today. Apparently he is strange and patient and gentle because feeling guilty has made me wretched. But I don't blame him. It is precisely I who feel guilty because it is fussy to ask for help and then make him rush to chase time.

I should also remember that God is a perfectionist man who is anti-tardly. He liked the rubber clock.

Hah,, it's my fault. Purely my. Both what has happened today, and all that has happened to me now, are purely my fault.

I tried to sit down and then I looked at my queen's stomach with a faint look. In this body there are lives that grow because of my mistakes. This is all beyond my expectations. I didn't think this would happen at all, given the reproductive health condition of Ody, but in fact this is happening. Either I have to be happy for him or sad for me.

Knowing that Ody is not barren certainly surprises me but also makes me happy for him. Isn't this way, when he has returned with aunty Valencia, then most likely aunty Valencia will also be able to get pregnant like me.

I'm happy for you, om,, I,,,

Then me?? I exhale violently and tend to contain despair. Can I endure this disgrace myself? What if I get blasphemed? Put aside? Considered a bad girl? What if one day this child was born and asked who and where his father was?

Son, why are you present? Why should your mother not even be ready? When your mother was still struggling to make a living.

For a moment I regretted and even blamed his presence. There was an intention to just drop it given my unsustainable status and daily conditions. But then I realized, this fetus is a memory of the most beautiful memories I have of Ody. This kid makes me feel like I'm not alone in this world anymore.

Although you will be born in the wrong situation and condition and status, but mother will still love you son. I will keep you no matter how much scorn or insult later. Mother will be responsible. Mother's decision that night that made you present in the mother's womb. So I'll accept all the consequences. Forgive me for thinking about throwing you away, son.

Yeah, I'm determined to take care of this pregnancy. I'm going to give birth to this child. Admitting itself. He's my son, my tears bear witness to my promise to my fetus. I rubbed my stomach gently.

The voice of God surprised me. I don't know when he was standing there. Did he see my cry too? Immediately I shed my tears and then I nodded for sure.

"Just take a taxi home." said Dewa.

"Where's your motor?" I asked as if I had forgotten we had just been in an accident, and then I remembered and spoke again, "is it still in the workshop?"

"Yes. Still mended. Besides, even if the motorbike is not damaged, you still have to take a taxi. Your condition does not allow for riding a motorbike. Afraid of what's going on with,,,,"

The gods did not continue speaking. I knew she was going to say my fetus, but she seemed to feel bad.

"Yes I understand. Come on." Immediately I got off the bed and walked towards him.

We walked to the place where the taxi was waiting. Arriving there, God opened the back door for me then he followed in after me.

We just kept quiet all the way. I have a lot of real questions but I'm rethinking asking her.

Let it be, I'd better shut up. Today I had enough to shock her.

🌸Pov Dewa🌸

I stopped my steps when I saw him rubbing his stomach. The tone seemed to be crying. From there, I can conclude she even just found out she was pregnant. Her silence also made me believe that the fetus did not have a strong status.

That fetal father must be irresponsible!!

Never mind. Don't be messed around. My job is to take him home now. Didn't he say that he missed his pillow roll and his mattress? Maybe it was the baby's wish.

He said that if pregnant women do not comply with his wishes, later his son likes to drool. Poor right? That's why I don't want to protest much anymore. I took him to the taxi park. He sits himself in the back passenger seat.

On our journey we were equally silent. As much as I can hold myself to not ask anything about her fetus. I'm afraid I'm asking the wrong question or I'm talking wrong. I just remember my promise to the doctor to keep her emotional.

Therefore, I chose to swallow a round myriad of questions on the head. Wait until who knows if he will tell it himself.

"Rest. Tuh pillow bolsters and the mattress is waiting." I said.

"Dew,,,"

"Yes. Need what else? Let me prepare." I said as he called me softly.

"Thank you."

"same. Take good care of yourself. Don't take too much work. Clothing business will be easy. Let me take it again. You don't work. At home." I said without a second thought.

"If you don't mind and still allow it, please don't take the shirt. Let me keep working. Me and my baby need more money to survive" he said, bowing.

"Can. Sure you can if you still want to." I went with all the answers to all the questions.

The baby has no father.

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