KARMAS
Fake status

I never thought of Grandma's house so far. He said it was just in the next village. The village next door is also far away.

I've started to feel bored walking behind Grandma, but Grandma did not show the slightest sign of fatigue.

“Not yet, just go home! Muck the way, turn! Later Non cape.” Moments later, Grandma told me to go home

“Already Grandma, relax. Nanggung anyan.”

“Still Away Non!”

“Kan ga every day Nek.”

Today I have the unanimous intention to visit my grandmother's house. If not forced grandma will not allow him to play at his house. ‘Home granny ugly non, Shy.’ It's always the pretext.

She is the grandmother of a vegetable seller around a residential complex. Her name is Granny Sainah. His body was old but his movements remained nimble carrying a basket of vegetables he peddled from house to house. Usually I match the menu with the granny merchandise brought at that time.

Every time my grandmother came to sit on the front porch floor of the house while removing vegetables, kitchen spices from her basket while waiting for me to come out.  Grandma never wanted to be invited in, just drink tea nyicip snack or a little breakfast.

“Aduh granny seneng accompanied Non. Non that's a rich granddaughter of grandma. Very baiik. Non the nancep real hearted granny.”

“What's the name Nek, Grandma's granddaughter? Where is it now?”.

“Available Non. Her name is Narti ”

“Ooh..”.

After almost two hours we walked, through the rice fields, through the bamboo forest, past the times that flooded the water, past the field, rambutan gardens, past the graves, weeds, cows, cows, and so on, his cage and muddy in the road because of the rainy season, they finally arrived at a place that...  I feel familiar with this place. He's been here before, but when?

I stopped looking around him, there was an old well with mossy walls, a leatherback tree, small pebbles on the damp ground, grass grass grass that was beginning to grow. I've been to this place before, but not here. So where?

“Come Non, Enter” Excited Grandma from across the field. Grandma was standing at the end of an alley that turned out to be a small road leading to her house. And this place turned out to be arguably the backyard of the grandmother's house.

Ah, I remember now. He had dreamed of this place. This place was once present in my dreams! What a strange dream.

“Let grandma walk alone, grandma always kongkow same Gusti Allah.  Duh Gusti Allah dear love me a healthy body. Rejeki flowing barokah ..” Story of grandmother arriving at her home. “Grandmother can't Non stay at home, body feels pain all if not work”. Further.

I kept quiet about the story. After I noticed for a long time the face of Grandma Sainah turned out to be very similar to my grandmother. Looks like my dead grandmother is in front of me. Nilar eyes! Right, my real grandmother is back!

🌾🌾🌾

Remembering the last moment with grandma, we were both in the room at that time. It's been almost a week Grandma's been lying in the room. I was reciting a letter to her, when I felt her warm back slowly becoming cold, the cold creeping from the lower half of her body slowly rising to the top, her chest, her heart, his neck was cold all over his body, and Grandma closed her eyes.

Grandma died on my lap. Not a word Grandma left for me, but so many memories with her because I was her favorite granddaughter.

In the past, Grandma also sold vegetables around in the housing complex of rich people in my village. Unlike Sainah's grandmother, my grandmother brought vegetables and groceries that she sold with a linjing carried with a long cloth tucked on her shoulder and tied with the end of the other cloth on her waist, and the look on his head.

If I am on school holidays sometimes I go to sell, walk next to him and often the highest behind him. Every home from the sale grandmother always bought it by the market hawker.

It feels that my longing for grandma can be treated with the presence of Grandma Saimah in my life. Ah apparently that's what makes Grandma Sainah feel so special to me.

“Trus kalo every day granny sales is not cape nek?”  I came back from my daydream.

“If again do not sell grandma go mengumpulin dry twigs for cooking. Kerosene is expensive, Non. so cook with wood.” Further.   “But even then grandma rarely cook, there are only people who come to love food with granny”.

“Ooh... continue to make what dong money from the sale?  How much good is granny selling a day if she runs out of vegetables?”

“Grandma's take vegetables in the stall, abis setor usually there are still ten or twenty thousand left. Grandma uses to snack in mesjid”.  As soon as grandma mentioned kencrengan for the charity box. “Every time the grandmother study never forgets the entrance money from the sale of grandmothers. One thousand, two thousand or five thousand every day. If the sick grandmother does not go to the mosque, usually the grandmother entrusts her neighbor to enter the money to kengengan”.

Stunned me.

‘If the pain is not to the mosque usually grandmother nitip neighbor.‘ It's only been in my life, finding something like this, nitip a neighbor to put money in a charity box at the mosque.

It feels shameful to heart. Shame on yourself, sometimes shy to give a little but give a lot is still a lot of thought. The grandmother worked just because she just wanted to be able to give and give everything she had, without hoping for anything, just wanted to be loved by the Gusti of God.

🌾🌾🌾

In front of my grandmother's original tomb, my eyes were glazed.

Ever since I was buried, I have never been to his tomb.

The condition is very unkempt, tombstones covered with moss, grass and wild plants grow there and the height almost covers the entire tomb. I ignored him for a long time. I never took the time to make a pilgrimage to his tomb when I returned home.

Maybe grandma misses me..

Or I who keep quiet miss him.

Longing is never expressed because it is blocked by time.

Then came the grandmother of Shaimah who reminded me

I cleaned the weed, stood in front of the tomb and prayed. I felt like my grandmother was looking at me and smiling in nature.