My Own Korean Drama
Chapter 20 - MY OWN KOREAN DRAMA
The Spring 2020
Lee Ji Ah, my manager and personal assistant arrived at the apartment lobby when I got off. The white van took me down the streets of Seoul, somewhere I was going today. Usually will close the eyes and then fall asleep but not this time. Spring is always my favorite season. I never wanted to miss the beginning of spring.
“Where are we going to shoot today?” I asked while staring out of the car.
“Itaewon,” replied Ji Ah.
“Scouting eat?” I asked while looking at Ji Ah who turned out to be busy reading my script today.
“Setting ate, and broke up,” replied Ji Ah then gave my script. I read the drama again. Of course I already remembered what I should say later only that I did not know that the two scenes would be in the same place. It's pretty sad to know a happy place, and sad to be in the same place.
Park Min-wook was already at the location when I arrived, I gave my greetings then walked into the waiting room. The crew was preparing the set while I was filming. I closed my eyes and soon fell asleep. Filming has been my life for eight years. Love stories with various backgrounds and conflicts have played out successfully. I myself do not know exactly how many characters I brought into the glass screen. Each character has their own uniqueness but there is one thing in common. Of the many stories that the author made for me to play, none of the stories that I hope really happened to my love story. Though the first reason I plunge into this industry is looking for a story that is similar to my memories.
At the beginning of the script reading, I thought Min-wook was going to be a figure, I was wrong, Min-wook became an important role holder but was only striking in the middle of the story. I still chose to take on this role despite knowing that I would continue to meet him. The public was also excited about my participation and Min-wook in this drama, and I think that is one of the factors of this drama is a big success than my previous dramas.
I haven't spoken to Min-wook beyond the drama issue. Min-wook himself never tried to talk about it either. Sometimes I wonder what he thinks. Did he give up on me? Does he want me to fight for him now? Or what? What's he thinking?
“Tomorrow is the last day we shoot,” I said pleasantries waiting for PD-nim to give directions to the extras.
“Is nuna any business the day after tomorrow?” Ask Min-wook, make me flutter.
“I don't think so,” I'm half sure, trying to remember my own agenda.
“Can we meet at Han River? At 2 am?” Ask Min-wook again.
“I still keep your apartment access card,” I said.
MY OWN KOREAN DRAMA
I used a yellow mustard scarf from Halmoni. My feet stopped on a bench and sat down. Min-wook is coming. The scarf of ashes that had faded wrapped his neck into the warmth of his body. That's my gift scarf.
“Crisis, that title is too rough for a love song. I think the Luvs and Tristers were also aware that the song was written by Park Min-wook for Christina McKenzie,” Min-wook monologued with a blank look at the Han river.
“Why did you change the title?” Tanya channeled my curiosity four years ago.
“Because I know someday my own feelings will be the biggest crisis of my life, I tried to survive two years to love Nuna, but it was too heavy.” Answer Min-wook ended the sobbing. My hand patted Min-wook on the back, stroking him gently trying to calm him down.
“Sorry, I wasn't there when you needed me,” I said half sob.
“What Nuna still loves me?” Ask Min-wook again.
“Sure!” I said half a scream. How could he doubt that. Suddenly Min-wook gets up and says, “thank you Nuna, thank you for still loving me” then Min-wook steps away from me. My broken cry stared at Min-wook's shoulder away. Is this the end of my story?
I'm down. Tears keep flowing. After Auriga now Min-wook? Is this the end? I always hated the bad ending. I always hated goodbye. For the first time in my life I finally understood why people out there prefer to watch dramas. When the drama is finished, maybe we will be dissolved in the drama for a while. Maybe if the couple in the drama was not with the people would be sad, but that's what makes the story feel real. In the end the drama will be talked about and get a lot of benefits.
Different from the drama, the ending of parting ways in life is stifling. Memories will keep spinning in my head. I still haven't forgotten Auriga's gaze the night we finally parted, I got hurt, we kissed, even the last time in Jogja. I still remember all those memories clearly.
Whether what will happen in the future, maybe for now the breakup will hurt but be the best for me and Min-wook. I realized that I was too mean to leave Min-wook at the airport that day. Someday these memories will come back to me. How Min-wook asked me for the first date, our first kiss, my gift scarf that he always wore even until the last time we met.
All of that gives the understanding that be it first love, second or how many times. Love is still love. Deep or shallow is still a feeling that cannot be forgotten. Falling in love once, twice, any number of times will not be enough. Whether it's with the same or different people. Falling in love is not a mistake even though in my work it seems an abomination and a great sin. I wish if I had to meet Min-wook again and I fell in love with him again, I wish I could fall in love freely.
The End's