Papa To Oleander
33. Peace Like This

Ola

As promised, when I came out of the room, Angga was busy preparing breakfast in the apartment kitchen which was rarely used.

"Hey, you. You up?" Angga raised his gaze from the bowl containing the pancake batter he was stirring. "Where's the sleep, good?"

I dragged my feet closer to her and carefully raised my bongsor body over one of the stools in front of the breakfast bar right across from Angga. "Hey. Yeah, tolerable. As good as sleep can be felt by mothers who are pregnant, old" I said. "All positions are wrong. Maybe what people say out there is true, if women will not be able to sleep quietly again starting from the age of nine months until the end of life."

Angga's movements suddenly stopped. "Come on, don't talk about it. You know it's just bullshxt. People who are not grateful for their lives."

Oh, my God. Kuhela took a long breath. "I know, I know. I'm sorry." Kuelus my stomach slowly and gently. Mama's sorry, yeah, honey. "I think I said that just because I was exhausted. I'm not grateful, no. I'm so grateful, even. Seriously."

The guy then slaps both elbows on the table. Her warm hand could easily reach my hand on the other side. Patted him with the soft back of my hand. "Yes, yeah. I-i know. But what if we keep a positive attitude? Let the baby not follow along so a person who likes negative thinking when he was born later. The world is full of people who like Suuzan so." Angga blinked one eye at me.

I can't disagree with his advice. "Ashiaap."

He chuckles. "Yes, already. What if you move to the middle room? Selonjoran equally alone on the sofa, gih. Let your body relax as well. When the breakfast is over, I take it there. We can have breakfast while watching TV. Deal?"

Oh, my God. How could he know what I wanted? "Super deal." I answered while trying to get down.

Suddenly my big arms and I Angga had surrounded my waist. "Be careful. Let me help you."

"Thanks." -."

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Why did God create him with this attitude?

****

Tiredness that hit my body turned out to have no effect on appetite. For that I owe a lot of thanks to God and Angga who have prepared everything. Pancake choco chips, orange juice he made himself. I mean, which guy would make orange juice for a girl who's not who from scratch like Angga did for me?

To you, Angga is a nobody, Ola. However, to Angga, you are who he is.

Oh, shut up.

No, you shut up. It is time to open your eyes and see what is in front of us. Who is actually accompanying you. Is he a fraud? Is he a bad guy? Which is unbelievable? Or is he just someone who made a mistake in his teenage years?

Take it seriously, Ola. Use your eyes. Remember Mas Johan's message? If the man is not the same. Not all of those men were as irritated as Owen. There are still good men. For example, he is sitting next to you right now.

After all, who never makes a mistake, right?

It seems, tired of my body also has no impact on the heart that is increasingly said lately. A heart that increasingly urges me to face the reality that lies ahead. It's not that it keeps getting hung up on the past and the heartache it causes.

After all, who never makes a mistake?

"Have you finished eating?"

Angga's voice returned me at this moment. I nodded to answer his question. "Udah."

I saw him immediately stand up and collect dirty dinnerware on the coffee table. "I finished this first. You just continue to watch it," he explained before walking with a pile of plates and glasses in hand.

See? See how light his hands are?

Yeah.

If it's not love, what's the name?

I ... I don't know.

****

Someone rubbed my face. I felt my eyelids shake before they could open and catch the Angga that was in front of me. His face was close to my face.

I didn't realize I was asleep while waiting for him to wash dishes and clean the kitchen. "Eh, sorry. I overslept."

His smile grew wider again. "Nothing. You're, right, tired, so you have a lot of rest. Can I help you get to the room?"

The offer doesn't sound so pleasant. "No, ah," I refused, trying to get up and sit down. "I still want to be out here. He said he'd watch."

"Oh, okay." Angga in Kalakian shook his body on the sofa beside me. "What do you want to see?"

"Don't know." I turned the television remote over the hand of the sofa on my right to her. "As far as you are."

"Seriously, huh?" ask the guy. His eyes are now shining. "Is it up to me?"

"He-uh." I supported my answer with a nod.

"Okay, then." He started pressing the remote button. A moment later, a familiar movie poster appeared on the screen.

The Bucket List's.

Angga looked at me as if asking, "This is okay?"

I just stared at him at the eye point that was starting to lose the light that had been there. I'm sure the indecision has been eating away at the feeling of pleasure he's had for a while.

I hate to have done that to her. To the good man who is beside me at the moment. In a good man, this is best. The man who, if I let go, I'm sure won't be able to find a replacement for him. I've tried, before. And of course I failed.

I don't want to fail again.

Lord, please, make this a hint that Angga is really the right choice for me. Make him the one with whom I'll get the happy ever after I've been looking all along. God, I beg you. I beg.

Shortly after, an impulse appeared in the depths of this heart. Initially a feeling of peace, which is increasingly spread until finally enveloping themselves.

I take it as a sign from heaven.

I shifted my seat until my body and Angga's body stuck. I raised his right arm before putting it on my shoulder. In the end, I rested my head on his chest which was hard because it was tense.

After a few seconds passed, I felt his shoulders move up and down significantly. The air coming out of his nose instantly blew the children hair loose from the original pigtails on my head. I felt his body relax. The shifting of our bodies so that there is no longer any possibility for air to sneak in between.

He also peeked at the top of my head for a long time.

And it's been a long time since I've felt this kind of peace.

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