Protective Physician
To RS

I've been sitting neatly in the waiting chair after registration, waiting for the examination turn. I came to the hospital on purpose this morning because he wanted to know quickly the current health condition. To get an operating schedule.

Actually, yesterday's plan was to leave with Tari. He did get a duty from the company to accompany me to seek treatment. It's quite strange, but because we feel benefited by this decision we're just having fun.

But unfortunately, this morning his sister informed him that his mother was sick, so he hurried back to his village. Dance appointment tomorrow at the latest he'll be back.

"Am I going to die that fast?" suddenly a girl whose age may not be far from me spoke to a husband and wife who accompanied him. I guess they are her parents.

"No son, you'll be fine. You must be strong to endure. We all love you and will always support you. You're not alone. We'll always have twenty-four hours even more for you.

Besides the two of us, you also have a big loving family. There's uncles, aunts, aunts, oms, cousins too.

Your friends care about you too. They will always pray for your health.

One more thing, you got Alex too. That young man loves you very much. Once he finds out you're sick, Alex decides to fly from America. He is willing not to continue his studies there as long as he can accompany you. Less is more, son? So many people love you. You just want to give up. You gotta be strong, boy!" his father told the girl.

I listened silently to the conversation of the child and his parents. Secretly, there was a feeling of envy that appeared in this heart. I also suffer the same pain, death can come at any time. But I'm on my own. No family, especially people who love him.

Ahhh, how pathetic!

I patted my chest a few times while muttering. "I'm fine, I'll keep fighting for myself. Let no one love me, but I must be strong, I love myself. God created this precious me!" aki made it clear to herself not to be discouraged.

But even so, I still feel discouraged. So it can only bow the face, hoping that no clear details from this netra come out.

"Miss Rissa!" call nurse.

I'll go into the examination room immediately. Again he met with the doctor Ines who yesterday gave a diagnosis.

"How are you, miss?" Ask Dr. Ines so kindly.

"It's not good, doc." I replied.

"Hey, why? Do you feel pain? Or any other complaints?"

Doctor Ines asked me to lie down so I could do an examination. So far, according to the doctor, my condition is quite good. But still whenever the pain can recur. I get some prescriptions to ease the pain if it starts to hurt.

"So when are we going to have chemotherapy?" ask Dr. Ines.

"Do you have to?" I asked back. "I mean, is there no other option? I'm afraid this hair is falling out." I showed you pretty thick hair. So that makes Doker Ines smile.

"I'm pretty sure you'll be pretty even without hair" said Dr. Ines. "You worried about the guy yesterday? He's your lover, right? I'm pretty sure he'll still love you even if you don't have any more hair."

"You're the wrong doctor. He has decided on me."

"Oh, sorry Rissa."

"It's okay." I smiled. When all is done, I'll be out. Walk away from the crowd.

It hurts so much here. Right now I feel very beautiful, but Fian has left me. What if I was bald and ugly later, no one would like me anymore.

I return to mourn fate. I compared myself to the woman again. When she was alone, the woman got a lot of support from the people around her.

Ahh, if God gave one person who was ready to give encouragement for him, it would not feel this heavy.

***

I looked far ahead. Look at the yellow sky. Glare in the eyes. But I held on, as if I were challenging him.

"You're not gonna kill yourself again, are you?" suddenly the man in the white coat stood behind me.

"You yourself why are you here again?"

I kept quiet, too, not realizing why I was on the rooftop again. To be precise, I was agitated, feeling discouraged so I continued to move until I got here.

"I just want to calm down!"

"At a place like this? You think I'll believe it?"

"It's up to you not to believe. Hey, you're not thinking that I came here to see you on purpose, are you, doc?"

"I don't accuse you of that. But if you think so, it doesn't matter."

"Hey!"

I feel really upset. While the young doctor smiled faintly. A smile that made me fall asleep for a moment, but I quickly sat down. Why does it feel so weird like this. His heart was pounding faster, especially when he smiled.

"Ahhh, wake up Rissa .. wake up! You're just a regular guy while he's a doctor!" I said to myself.

"You why? Speak, I'll listen."

"Why should I talk to you?"

"Hm, you only have ten minutes. After that please leave this rooftop!"

"I'm just jealous."

"Dear?"

"Yes, when another patient is accompanied by his family, friends or lover. I just came alone. No one cheers me."

"Why do you always hope in humans?"

"Would it be wrong to wish on humans?"

"You're only gonna lose! I told you, right? Just hope in God."

"But it ...."

"There's no buts. Or you haven't let go of your ex?"

"It's over!"

"Then?"

"none. Ahhh, I'll just go. I'm tired, I don't want to think much." I'm leaving. After a few steps, the man called back.

"Rissa .. No matter what your life is about, you don't have to wish on a human. You have God. If you need support, I'll support you!"

"You?"

"Yes. Wh why? You moved?"

"No!" I turned around, leaving the rooftop with a smile. Somehow there is a music that is so cheerful heard in these ears, like people who experience falling in love.

Just reaching the ground floor, this move suddenly came to a halt. I just realized, why would that man want to be an encouragement in my life?

"Ahhh, what am I thinking? Well, obviously he did it because I was a patient at the hospital where he worked. He must have done it because of the totality of his work. Why am I being a GR like this!" I shook my head, then resumed my journey towards the kosan.