The Traces of Destiny
Recognition

...🥀I hope one day, someone will hug you for 20 minutes , and that's all he does. He didn't let the hug go away....

...He didn't even see your face. He didn't even try to kiss your lips and neck. I hope all he does is hold you, without the slightest bit of selfishness.🌹...

...☕☕☕☕☕☕☕...

Right now, the answer to that question scared Saras more than he could say.

By the time he finally came out of the bedroom, all the lights were already on. Garin returned from the kitchen with two cups of coffee.

"I think we might need this" he said, lifting the cup slightly higher.

"I think it might be a good idea" Saras agreed.

The way he said it felt strange to Garin, and made Garin hesitant.

Saras made himself comfortable on the sofa, and after a while, Garin put the cup on the end table and sat down beside Saras. For a long time, Saras only drank his coffee in silence. Until Garin finally took his hand.

"Are you all right?" Garin asked.

Saras gently turned the coffee in his glass. "There's something I haven't told you yet" he said slowly.

The room went back to being quiet.

Garin could hear the sound of cars crossing the street in front of the apartment.

The sound of water hatching from the back side of the refrigerator clanking, the chandelier swaying in the wind from the open window, there was a small squeak there, also a shadow dancing on the wall.

Saras pulled one leg up and crossed it down. Garin finds out the woman is gathering her thoughts, she notices him in silence before squeezing Saras' hand to give him support.

And that seems to bring Saras back to the present. Garin saw the light of the chandelier flickering in his eyes.

"You're a good man, Garin," he said, "and these last few weeks have meant so much to me." Saras stopped again.

Garin disliked this voice and wondered what happened during the few minutes he was in his bedroom. He chose to keep his attention and be quiet.

"Did you remember when you asked me about my ex-husband?" Ask Saras.

Garin nodded.

"I haven't actually finished the whole story. There's more than just the thing I told you, and."

"Why?"

As an official she was used to paying attention, a number of ideas flashed through Garin's mind - whether her ex-husband had been rude, and the man had hurt her deeply as long as they were in touch in terms of physical, physical matters, or things like infidelity, make him leave the relationship hurt in some way. Divorce is always painful, but its current appearance suggests that there is more to it than that.

Garin tried to review a strand of smiles, hoping to get a response, but there was nothing.

The silence is a little long.

"Listen, Saras," at last Garin said, "you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to tell. I'm not gonna ask her again. That's your business, and I've learned enough about your past. The last few weeks have been enough to know what kind of person you are, and that's all that matters to me. I don't need to know everything about you - and to be honest, I doubt anything you say will change the way I feel anything about you."

Saras smiled, but his eyes refused to return Garin's gaze. "Did you remember when I asked about Maudy?"

"Yes." Yeah." Answer Garin.

"Do you remember the things you said about him?" Ask Saras back.

Garin nodded.

"I also remember all the things you said about him." For the first time, Saras looked Garin in the eyes in that conversation. "I want you to know that I can never be like her, I can never be like Maudy."

Garin frowned. "I know that," he said. "And I didn't expect you to-"

Saras raised his hand. "Not that, Garin-you misunderstood. I'm not saying that you're interested in me because I'm like Maudy. I know that's not the case, but I don't know that either."

"Then what's up?" Garin asked.

"Did you remember when you told me how good Maudy was as a mother? And how much do you two really want Raka to have a sibling?" Saras stopped but did not expect an answer. "I can never be like that. That's why Aldi left me."

Garin's eyes were finally glued to his eyes. "I can't get pregnant. But it's not him, Garin. Aldi is fine. But I....."

Garin remained silent.

And then, as if the sentence did not convey its meaning, just in case Garin did not understand, Saras conveyed it back as clearly as possible. "I can't have children. Forever."

Garin said nothing, and after a while, Saras continued.

"You can't imagine what it's like to know this reality. It feels ironic, you understand? I spent my early twenties trying not to get pregnant. I usually panic if I forget to take the Pill. I never even thought that I might not be able to have a child."

"How do you know that?" Ask Garin.

"We have regular body contact. It was even more intense when we started planning to have a baby. Nothing happens to this body. We finally went in for a series of tests. That's when I found out."

"Sorry," that was all Garin thought to say.