The Way of Love for the Doctor
SEASON 1 Part 35's. I'm Ready

“Tomorrow, deg-degan?” Bambang and I were finally able to talk between our finished preparations this afternoon. After a simple proposal, we started to prepare everything together with the wedding planner. A small wedding that only invited close friends and family was enough for us.

And tomorrow is our wedding day, because we prepared only a few invitations and a professional WO helped us, even we did not make a fussy prewedding photo, only photos in the studio take no more than half a day. Some other things are arranged as simple as possible, although still time-consuming but not so complicated and can be passed without feeling burdened. It feels even fun through the process together. It is very different from the first marriage where the ceremony is bigger and more complicated.

“Hmm. Strange yes not deg-degan, seneng aja but if deg-degan not too rich anyway.”

“Maybe because we've been here before, or our thoughts are different from ten years ago. But tomorrow you're gonna be my wife, having you back home is so much fun. I don't feel like losing every time you go, it's really torturous. If three months could be shortened by three weeks would be better. But from tomorrow we will always be together.”.

“I'm scared. Fear of us changing one day, fear of trouble makes us hate each other. Promise me one thing.” I clasped his hand.

“What?”

“Don't ever say I'd be happier if I wasn't with you.” He's embracing me.

“I know those words are wrong... No, things are different now, I know my responsibility. I used to be annoyed with the obligation as a family, I did it to make Mama happy, not because I was fully prepared, I had no idea what I was up against, I had no idea what I was up against, we were both young and had different expectations from each other. Or maybe it's personal we don't fit each other, I think love can handle it at the beginning but it's not. But now my life is meaningless without you and the children of our future. I don't know if you think everything was very wrong at that time..”.

“Your ex-wife comes later?” He has made peace with his wife.

“Hmm she's ready to come. He invited me when he got married six years ago, we talked at length when things were down, when he was finally happy, I was glad he found someone. And I'm sure when she was willing to invite me, she understood finally why I never regretted our divorce decision. We can say we have made peace. But we don't have to talk about the past. It's all over. Now it's just the two of us.”

“Only the two of us..” I'm holding his hand now.

“We both start tomorrow. And so on until the end, may God allow that to happen and we will try to stay afloat in our toughest times. In joy or sorrow, ..”

“No words - you'd be happier without me-. If you dare to say that word, I will make you miserable I promise. If you dare to have a concubine one, rich ex me, maybe I will run PIL two as well.”.

“Other Dream Men...” He directly ngakak.

“Tamer ngancem number wahid.” He pulled my nose, I smiled.

“What's your biggest fear?” Now it was his turn to ask. I thought for a moment before admitting it.

“Fragal because of the same thing, but now that I understand one thing, one can only control oneself instead of controlling others. If each of us tries to respect each other and look after each other, talking calmly for the sake of family, all we can certainly go through.  If someone of us betrays and hides him, who bears him is the person himself, the responsibility is not to his partner anymore, but directly to the Creator. I don't like watching people close, I trust you. I used to be young, I was still able to get out and start over. Maybe somehow when I'm in the position of already having children, I'm not young anymore, maybe you play games with other women, I will choose silence and survive, for the sake of child happiness, for the sake of child happiness, your behavior will probably make our relationship change forever. But I'm gonna stay there, I'm not your judge anymore, I'm giving up on judgment, maybe I'm gonna go on a show, I don't know if we're ever gonna be the same again, whether I can forgive or whether I can act right myself, I don't know, maybe I just live my duty as a mother, maybe, but I hope we never fall into that problem.”.

He was silent to see me.

“I know what you're talking about. I also had a fear that I was too ordinary, sometimes too selfish, pursuing what my own target was like before, maybe somehow falling like you said, she said, too clueless about a woman's needs that my partner isn't happy and so on. Papa said love is temporary, but love is eternal. If you want to give love to your family, you will always act right, I just want a quiet life, away from quarrels. Having a child that I love like any other parent, after all I really don't like the fluctuations of feelings, you know missing someone can make it hard to work. Don't relax, I don't have the ambition to make a harem like your ex..” It's my turn to smile now.

“I think we both have the same understanding of a quiet family that our children are not. We'll be fine, although sometimes I upset you a little. Yes but we'll be fine.” I clenched his hand to hear his additional words.

“We both will try to make everything okay.” I agreed to it, somehow my fear lessened hearing it. Nothing is easy, as long as we live there must be a problem, but hearing that each of us has a good desire to always live peacefully away from the quarrel is enough.

“Now you're ready for tomorrow.” He asked while holding my hand.

“I'm ready.”