Tiba Khitbah
Blaming the Destiny

Zahra's patience as thin as a tissue is now running out, even now he is in the stage is no longer able to bear everything. He was angry and disappointed in the life destiny that God gave him, so he cried out so loudly to blame Tuha for the destiny and the way of life that God gave him.

Zahra was really no longer able to think clearly and accept everything that happened to her, it felt like the burden was really very heavy and the girl herself was also no longer able to bear it.

'If indeed God is Most Merciful and Most Merciful, why does God not hear all the prayers that I offer Him, do I not deserve to feel happiness for myself.' That is how Zahra's inner voice is turbulent, where he is at the point of being fed up with all the circumstances that corner and make his heart depressed.

Zahra also felt she could not find the answer to all her questions. Until now, Zahra began to think that he should not have migrated and turned into a better human being, because his life before the hijrah was perfect, because his life was perfect, where he gets all the things he wants without having to follow His orders. Truly, life is very much different from its present state, which is full of trials, challenges and heavy obstacles.

"Don't I have to change myself for the better?"

Yes, Zahra began to feel useless with her change, even God did not hear and answer her prayers, and all that remained in the girl was continuous sadness and pain. Until it occurred to me

Zahra to return to her former self, Zahra who did not wear the hijab and easily left her prayers.

'Do not profess faith, if it has not been tested!'

Suddenly Zahra's inner voice shook him, because he often heard a sentence that is a translation of the Qur'an is often read by ustadz-ustadz at the lectures he listened to.

Yes, how could Zahra have professed faith if Allah had not tested it. How could Zahra have felt that he was one of God's most miserable creatures while he claimed to have believed. Zahra had forgotten all the favors God had given her, the blessings of life and the healthful blessings she had. Even many people want to be like Zahra, many live with Zahra-like circumstances.

Yes, Zahra was not aware, if if one of the blessings of God was taken from him, for example, the favor of the air. If God did not allow him to breathe air again, it is possible that Zahra is no longer alive in this world.

Now, some of Zahra's heart blames God's destiny, and some of Zahra's little heart is awakened by a glimmer of guidance that he ignores when his little heart has said it. Verily, where the pride of the soul makes it blind and deaf to the point of not being able to receive the good that is brought from there..

Tok ..., tok ....

"Zahra, are you asleep, son? Abi in!"

Abi Abdullah's voice rang out behind my room, and Zahra quickly wiped away the tears that flowed down her cheeks. Really, he did not want his father to see him cry because it would hurt his heart and his feelings.

Zahra also immediately rushed to lie on the bed while covering her face with a blanket because she was too embarrassed to meet the father who had never been disappointed.

"Zahra, Abi come in, son!"

Zahra heard the sound of his father's slow and quiet footsteps. Yes, abi Abdullah is indeed an authoritative man with a very calm nature, even the calmness he emits makes the people around him also feel the peace and tranquility that he emits..

"Zahra, Abi knows you haven't slept, son. Abi is eager to share his story with Zahra because we haven't done it in a long time, son."

Yes, Zahra felt the movements of the father, where he sat beside the princess while trying to lift the blanket that covered his face.

"Zahra, Abi wants to talk, son. Can Abi talk to you for a minute, son?"

Abi Abdullah's words melted the heart and feelings of the princess. Yes, however, Zahra could not resist the wishes of the father, let alone Abi Abdullah did not get angry or yell at his beloved daughter. He just wants to speak from the heart of a father to his daughter.

Slowly Zahra opened his eyes, he faced his face to the father with a sitting position facing the father. Yes, Zahra looked at Abi Abdullah with a shame that enveloped her heart and feelings.

However, there was doubt and indecision in Zahra's heart, not knowing where to begin and explaining where she was dealing with life's problems. Zahra lay down and sat down again.

"Son, listen to Abi!" abi Abdullah said softly, to the heart of the beloved princess.

Zahra got up from her bed again, then sat down opposite Abi Abdullah, because Zahra appreciated her father very much.

Zahra honestly could not afford to look at his father's face, so all he did was look down. How he felt very guilty and sinful for his attitude and behavior that indeed crossed the line to his parents.

"Zahra, what's wrong? Why fight with Ummi, son?"

Abi Abdullah may also be curious about the problem of the princess and her beloved wife, even though their family has always been harmonious, even I am a child who almost said never to fight to parents.

"Zahra's just not in the mood, Bi."

The dishonest answer that came out of Zahra's speech made Abi Abdullah silent and did not force the princess to tell the truth.

"Zahra, there is no problem that there is no way out and no parent who does not love his child. If Zahra has a heavy burden that feels stifling, then tell me everything the same Abi, because Abi will be a good listener for you, Abi may also be able to provide solutions to solve your problems, son."

Abi Abdullah really makes me feel that Zahra still has parents who did not leave him when he was not okay.

"Bi, is it true that God is Most Merciful and Most Merciful?"

The cliche question I wanted to get from oral abi because he wanted a certainty of what Zahra had previously believed.

"Dear, whether all the blessings of life that you have received is not enough to prove that Allah is a Most Merciful and Most Merciful God" replied Abi Abdullah with full confidence.

"So why did God not hear Ara's prayer? Does Ara not deserve something Ara wants?"