We are Not Honey
Chapter 3. The Same Wound

Pov Meisya

~ I feel like I never make a mistake, because I just want to fight for my love. If they think I'm desecrating marriage, then let it be my business with the creator. The most important thing is, right now I can still be with him under any circumstances.~

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I was back in my big bed. The phone I just used to talk to the man I love is still in my grasp. Somehow the fate of this marriage and my love story. A marriage that neither my parents knew about, nor Ryan's parents. Perhaps with this, God deliberately rebukes me, if what I have been doing all this time is wrong in His eyes.

How then? What am I supposed to do now? My love for Riyan is so great, and I don't want that man to leave me alone here.

"Honey's.." The voice of the man who had always loved me, was heard behind the door of the room.

"Yes, Dad." Without any intention of getting out of bed. "Tomorrow, Dad. I'm so sleepy today, so many patients." I said again so that the man I was sure was still standing in front of my bedroom passed from there.

"All right, we'll talk tomorrow, son." Daddy Erland's voice was heard again.

"Good, Dad." Answer me again. A sigh of relief came out of my mouth when I heard Daddy's footsteps start to move away from my bedroom front. I swear by anything, I don't want them to know how miserable I am today because of Riyan's marriage. The wedding was witnessed by our extended family, and all our friends. It's possible, I'm the only one who didn't attend that fancy event.

With my body covered in a thick blanket, I rubbed my phone screen again. Hoping for a message to treat my grief tonight, back in. However, my hope is only hope.

Ah, I'm so stupid. There are men who want to miss a sweet and beautiful girl like Zahra. Many doctors at the hospital wanted to question the sweet girl, but the second son of the hospital owner had already asked for her. Ah, if only God had given Rayan a long life, maybe my love story with Riyan would not have been this complicated.

I want to die. I really could not imagine that there Riyan was hugging the girl, while I just hugged her shadow here.

If it's true said that girl Riyan was hurt, then I was just as hurt as her. My heart is as painful as it is to let the man I love marry another girl just because of the trust of the dead.

The night is getting late. This is the longest night I've ever been on. All this time, I have never felt anything like this, so my eyes do not want to be invited to rest. In fact, I need a lot of energy to get back through tomorrow well. My heart is too tired, for that I need my body to still be able to go through every steep road that I created myself in my life.

If only that day I hadn't forced Riyan to marry, I probably wouldn't have felt the pain of being a honeyed wife with another woman. But on the one hand, I can't let the man I love get married and live with another girl. Really, I wouldn't be able to even just imagine it.

The night began to go. But, my eyes have not been able to fall asleep. Maybe tonight, I really won't be able to fall asleep, because Riyan's face just keeps dancing in my brain.

I slowly pulled away the white blanket that wrapped my body, then got out of bed and stepped onto the balcony of my bedroom with my phone still in my grasp.

Still waiting for a message from Riyan or anything else to get into my phone. However, it seems that I was too hopeful, to forget that now it is not just me in Riyan's life.

"Sheesh, yes."

One message goes into the phone. Well, here comes my priest who never forgets to remind me of our creator. Not waiting for long, I immediately dialed his phone number, and lucky the man who since last night made my eyes can not be closed, immediately answered my call.

"I want to pray at dawn, May." He said, and I remained silent. Just hearing his voice like this, it already made my heart rumble.

"If you still want to talk on the phone, I pray first, nothing." Another woman's voice rang out again in my mouth, making my chest again claustrophobic.

"No, we pray together. Mei, it's yes." Rian said again. I dropped my hand, keeping the flat object out of my ear so as not to hear something that would make my heart hurt even more.

Looks like Riyan lied to me. The girl sounds fine. He was not hurt at all by our circumstances.

I turned around and entered the room with tears dripping down my cheeks. What kind of life did I choose, God? What kind of love am I fighting for? Why is this love so painful?.

If in the previous nights I would have been eager to accomplish what I was told, not tonight. Because after the morning greet, I will definitely get hurt again, when I find them together.

I put my body back on the bed, and fell asleep. Well, I'm really tired. Not only is my body tired, but also my heart. Just now these eyes wanted to be closed, a knock on my bedroom door, was heard with a familiar voice.

"Mommy's son is still sleeping? doctor is lazy."

The blanket that covered my body, pulled by her. I don't know that my eyes just closed.

"Wake, Honey. Many pregnant women are waiting for you." Say Mommy again.

I squirmed slowly, and forced my body to get up from the bed.

"What's wrong with your eyes?" Ask Mommy Friska.

"Riyan's married, Mam." Overshipped. My Mom and Dad know the relationship between me and Riyan, as well as with Riyan's parents.

"Loh, Mommy thinks you've let her go."

I'm shaking. I allow it, but can't let it go. That's how I scream. My marriage to Riyan was unknown to our family. The betel wedding that I forced, just as a reminder, so that Riyan does not forget about me and our love.