Grasping
Part 48 (Born as a woman without luck)
The debate last night did happen very great, like a strong stinging flash to melt a fragile heart increasingly damaged. However, can the innocent woman who is called a fool speak? Could rebel? Can you lift your leg immediately? Nah! The woman is still doing the same thing, standing between two human beings who may attach importance to their own feelings. It's just a meaningless mannequin. Every place is seen as rubbish.
"Master, today I want to go back to the village," Niar said expressionlessly.
The man who used to spread a ignorant smile, now looked cold no smile activity on his lips. Not because Yusha hates Niar. Nah! The man felt guilty about last night. Although Niar looks strong and fine, but he knows the heart is hurting. "Hem ... later Dedi will take you," Yusha replied.
Niar twisted the ends of the shirt worn. There was something he wanted to say, but he seemed hesitant.
"I'm sorry for last night. Sheli is outrageous." Suddenly the man made a sound.
"It's okay, sir."
The answer from Niar makes Yusha even more guilty. That's him, the woman who always says 'it's okay, I'm fine' even though her heart is melting. No one knows, she is stronger than we can see. The woman is very great, even in tears but in front of others can put on a smile - despite the smile of falsehood.
"U-for last night's word .. If you send me home, maybe our deal could end." Niar said softly. He wanted to be near Yusha, the first man capable of raising his laughter. The first man to feel his warmth. But, there are expensive fees that must be redeemed, insults and insults from Sheli. Self-esteem trampled to no trace. On the other hand, he realized that whenever Yusha still belonged to the woman, she was not his - she was only the woman who came at the end.
The formally dressed man in a navi-colored suit breathed in the air and exhaled slowly.
"I can return the money you spent to my family, but ...." That sentence was broken.
"But what?" sela Yusha fast.
"But let me get out of here. You can trust my words, give it a year. I'll come back to pay it all off."
"No!" reject Yusha quickly and firmly. That one word seemed to come out by itself without being in command. The voiceless heart immediately revolted into feeling in order to keep Niar here-his body.
"You can find another woman, sir. And the end of our agreement doesn't make your marriage with Miss Sheli peaceful again."
The man clenched his mouth again, but his heart and feelings were more and more united to hold off the innocent Niar-women who were able to change his days more nuanced. Conscience wants the woman to stay here - by her side.
"It's only been 6 months, there's still plenty of time to wait" Yusha said looking at Niar.
The woman who was still twisting the end of the shirt was grimacing and smiling wryly. 'It's only been six months? It's not overnight that you yourself said 6 months was a long time ago.' The woman wanted to refute, but was unable to get her sentence out. Free, he knew everything that came out of his lips would be considered meaningless.
"We both do not know the certainty, it is only 6 months, but the more the 6-month day can turn into 6 years. Will my life be locked up here without certainty? Sir, forgive me. I can't stay here any longer, let me go back where I belong."
"No Niar! I won't let you go. You are not too strong to go back there, you are not strong enough to face your mother and sister ... "
"You're wrong! I'm stronger and tougher against them, but .. I'm not that firm to face you and Miss Sheli. I am too fragile and unable to fight my own heart."
Deg ...
Yusha was fixated, what did Niar mean 'against his own heart?'
"I'll pack, sir. Maybe we need time to decide what kind of good to take. Please allow me a while to stay at your home. Whenever the word talak is spoken, I accept." The woman turned quickly towards her room. He did not want to show his hurt feelings in front of Yusha.
The heart that had been comfortable beside the man could not accept when his lips said 'whenever the word talak was said, I accepted.' Really, the deepest foundation contradicts that sentence. 'I'm comfortable being here-on your side, sir. I don't want to part with you. You were the first to understand me - the first people were able to make these lips open wide for a carefree laugh. How can I stay away from you? Should my laughter be snatched again? Can I find comfort from others, if my comfort is only with you.' The mind screamed loudly, getting more chest-stifling until it was impeccable to breathe.
Niar held a sob behind the door. Both hands are folded and rested on the knees, while the face of the joints is set between the arms of the hands. Withholding sobs and continuing to be detained.
So hurt. Why was she born a woman without luck? Why was he born only with grief?
This earth is not fair, this earth is not the place to stand. On this earth only in the habitation of selfish people who always hurt his heart. This earth is not suitable for the dwelling place of her who has a soft heart.
Behind the door he dives in sadness, the body reluctant to move to the bed. Her beautiful eyes were heavily open to see this room - a room that held beautiful memories wrapped in wounds.
Until unconsciously the sad eyes full of wounds were closed there. Hopefully, when those eyes open again, he has been in a different realm. Nature is more beautiful than it is now.