Heartrest
episode 19 of constant fraud

lesson from this episode:

be honest with yourself and others rather than continue to cheat because all deception hurts yourself..

life is in a harsh word like a gamble..

risking something, for something..

and I'm risking myself..

in a relationship full of fraud..

upon arrival my husband was Adrian at home I greeted him with a smile and a hug..Abg Yus put my husband's bag in our room.Then brother Nora and brother Yus asked permission to return to their house next door..

"the branch wants to eat?"

my tokyoo..

Adrian just shook his head and held my hand, while anchoring my back on the sofa next to me. The atmosphere in the living room became quiet.only me and Adrian..

"the baby misses branch."

he said spoiled .

"Mia is also ."

said it while looking down..

"why can't brother call?"

ask Adrian..

the teliphon was broken, because I was too angry with Alfian..

I was stupid..

too stupid..

until I can't distinguish..

good and bad..

my stupidity cannot be contained..

"ha?"

I was surprised when Adrian grabbed my shoulder.I jolted from the daydream..

"fall, the pastu can't keep going."

my answer is simple..

"ok, takpa.later tonight we go out and buy a new teliphon."

my husband said with a smile and hugged me..

he rubbed my arm..

"why do you wear long sleeves at home?"

ask Adrian again..

do I have to answer honestly Najwa to close the wound on my wrist..

"oh"

it hurt when Adrian touched the wound..

he held my wrist and saw the wound and bandaged.

"sad you're leaving yourself again?"

adrian asked right looking into my eyeball..

"no, she's got a cat's paw."

I answered while pulling my hand and throwing a fake smile at Adrian..

"i miss you"

my husband Adrian said as he hugged me tighter..

ask Adrian slowly..

and I just nodded..

the cooking of a wife rejects the husband's embrace, that's all that comes to her..

even this me..

this body is not mine..

not mine..

when I was with Adrian..

I feel myself..

like statues..

as decoration..

while i..

you cannot choose or refuse..

like clothes or perfume..

even everything Pihan him..

before this I never told a story ..

but now everything's changed..

my heart is heavy ..

Adrian put my body on the bed and then he stroked my hair..

"Mia's actually tired."

I said slowly, I dodged to kick Adrian in the eye..

"takpa,Mia baring ja"

adrian kissed me and touched my body..

and I just became like a statue, and I didn't seem willing..

as I tried to close my eyes Alfian's face incarnated in my mind.I even remembered my moments with him..go and leave me and not confess your seeds that are in my womb..

you said you insulted me..

you kind of killed me..

with your words..

what is your response to me?

what am I to you?

what do you think I am?

am I too stupid?

is that what you think Alfian is?

am I just ..

fill up your empty time?

when you're bored and quiet?

am I just..

lustful satisfiers?

i'm mistaken..

because it's too stupid..

and entangled in this stupid love..