Hot Couple: Love Story Inara Season 2
I Want to Give Up

"Since when?"

"What?"

"When have you taken drugs like this?"

Kepos!

"Jawab. Since when?"

"What do you care? Hmm?"

"Jawab it."

"Don't you fucking care!"

"Java!"

"Why? Slaps before. Now you have dared to snap at me? Huh yeah?"

Silent. Reza was silent because of my words, when in fact he only spoke a little loudly, not yelling at me. I was exaggerating because I was already emotional.

"If you care about me fully, you know my suffering. Ever since you were caught lying and slapping me, I needed a drug to help me sleep, a drug that could shake all my thoughts about your irritation. You dickhead. You never change."

He immediately looked down with a guilty and regretful face. "I'm sorry?" said.

I'm shaking. "I don't want to hear. I'm sick of it."

I was just about to leave when Reza's hand held my arm. But he kept quiet, as if he didn't know what to say after his apology I refused.

"We can talk while sitting down" I said. But Reza remained silent, even as she followed me and we sat face to face in the sofabed dining room of Lesehan. Unable to stand the silence of the minutes, I opened my voice, "You know, you are like a coin with two different sides. Sometimes you show the perfect husband and father, but other times, you are like this. You're still playing behind my back. Or maybe because it's so perfect, that's why all this happened. Thank you very much, yes, you have made me have to take drugs like this. You really are an amazing father. Even more amazing than my father. Facing my father alone I never had to take drugs like this. But facing you? Amazing, right? Thank you, Mommy."

He raised his eyes to the clouds. While I'm not entirely sure I want this conversation to extend. "I just feel guilty. I feel sorry for him, for his son. I'm...."

"O yeah? Feel guilty? Or.. feel still in love?"

He took a deep breath and then rubbed his face. "I'm sure -- I just love you and no longer love Salsya. I'm completely sure about that."

"Lantas, why do you feel guilty? Hm? People have their own destiny, Mas. They also have a choice, and a brain. You have a brain, right? There are many widows out there whose condition is far more apprehensive than your Salsha. You can feel sorry for them and you don't have to make Salsya special, can you?"

Reza looked at me with a strange look that I could not understand, whether he was upset, angry or what. That sure makes me cringe. I reflexively retreated a little and put my hands together to protect my stomach. And it made her surprised, she realized my fear. If I wasn't pregnant at the time, her gaze made me want to attack her.

A few seconds later, Reza came down from the sofa. He wrapped his agitated arm around my body, then buried his face in my thigh while crying. "Don't be afraid. I won't be rude anymore. No, it won't" he regretted.

I was stunned to see her reaction, and at the same time felt guilty for thinking she would be rude to me again. With clumsy fingers at a loss I had to act "how" - - I touched his head and moved my fingers - - a little. To be honest I intended to caress her but I was unable to. "I...."

I can't say anything. The words vanished and fell off my vocal cords. Maybe because she didn't get the response she wanted, Reza lifted her head and looked at me. "You scared?"

"I...."

Reza almost cried. His eyes are red-glazed. "Cuff my hand" he said, raising both hands. He thrust his wrist in front of my face with both hands clenched.

I shook my head, with the same eyes. "Don't be like this, Mom...."

"It's okay, so you're comfortable, you're calm. I don't want you to be scared."

"You wait here, let me get you the handcuffs."

Reza was just about to stand up and blow into the room, but I stopped him immediately. "No need," I said. He crouched his knees again in front of me, looking up at me while tightly grasping my hand. Her tears rolled, making me unable to see her. "I'm just anxious, my kids.I mean...."

"Shhh. don't be afraid." He cupped my face and wiped my tears so that my fear began to disappear. Then I asked her to sit down next to me again, and she did it better. He immediately hugged me and leaned me against his chest.

For a long time I tried to control my thoughts before I could say words that made sense, or maybe not at all.

"Mass?"

"Emm?"

"Our relationship is starting to get unhealthy. I don't know, or it was unhealthy from the beginning. Be better-"

Reza released a hug and held me half an arm away. "Don't talk carelessly. Even if it's true, we can fix everything, right?"

I took a deep breath, my chest felt tight and my head started to feel dizzy. The sleeping pills began to react. "Obviously not healthy, Mom. Me, you, us - as if just forcing things."

"Not so."

"Buck...."

"Darling...."

"You're not with me to torture me, are you?"

"No," he said quickly and shook his head strongly.

"I want you to be happy. But the truth is, my presence by your side is what makes you tormented."

Oh my God, her tears are spilling. "I'm happy, honey. I'm happy with you. Don't talk-"

"Not completely, Mom. You're tormented for not being able to be with Salsya."

Reza shook her head emotionally. "Please, please, please, please. You. You don't misunderstand me. Don't get me wrong."

"OKAY. But obviously, I'm the one who's tormented. I'm tormented to see you who's moody, who feels guilty, daydreaming, even you can't sleep thinking about that woman. This is no good. Not good for all parties." I'm getting restless. My facial expressions and movements began to unsettle. "I, you, and our children are victims of this. Why are we forcing to be together while you still think about that woman? This is not good for me and my fetal development. My mind is burdened, Mas. Maybe we should let each other go."

Reza listened to me - just not to interrupt me. Meanwhile, my headache was getting worse and my head was pounding. "Don't think heavy. That's not good for our children" he said.

Oh, sometimes he knows and he understands, but other times he starts to re-become Salsya's Reza.

"God.... Always like this. Can you provide the best solution for all parties? Or should I?" I said while clutching my hair. "Oh, or something like that. You can't, can you, let go of Salsya? And, you, you can't stop thinking about him either. So...." I was frustrated and started to have the desire to give up. "You marry her, and you can take care of her child. Let me back off. Hm? You are married and we are divorced. Or, we get divorced and then you marry her. Whatever, which one first. That's best" I said with a huff.

Reza could not answer, but his head shook with rejection, with a choking sound and tears breaking.

"You don't worry, if we part well - I'll never forbid you from seeing your children. Free, whenever, however long, I will allow."

Now it was Reza's turn to clutch her hair. "Don't talk anymore" he said. He pulled me back into his arms. I felt his arms curled tightly and his lips kiss my forehead."

"I'm tired. I want to give up. I can't watch you always remember him, you always think of him. We fought a lot and it scared me. I'm afraid you're rude and hurt my shit. I. I want to split up. This marriage torments me, "my voice is getting weaker, I'm like a delirious person. A moment later I began to become unconscious.