Treasure, Throne, Renata
The Fall of the Talak Rania Story

Rania's Story

The incident at my in-laws' house last night still left a pain in my heart. But I tried to be patient, my determination to keep the household for the sake of the children was greater than my ego. As much as possible I obey what Ray wants, who knows Ray wants to calm himself from all his financial problems.

After mediation that night, Ray invited me home the next day. On the road we no longer talk much, there is also no music chanting during the trip, we all just dissolve in silence. When I got home I was still trying to serve him, I prepared a meal until I asked him all his needs. Ray knew I was hurt so much, my silence meant I was very disappointed in him, but it didn't necessarily make him melt into me. He kept dodging and playing around with our son.

“ Ran, Kila's piano I've posted on the internet. I've been selling to pay school fees and eat you guys until the end of this month. Possibly this afternoon the buyer wants to take here “, said Ray in the room after he took a shower.

I just fell silent and resigned to all his decisions, but gradually this house must be sold as well. I can't move with that piano. Ray tells Kila that his piano has been sold, looks disappointed from my son's face, but he is heartened to let it go.

Not only that, Ray also sells televisions in my room to swings in the back garden. In a day, all of those things are sold. Ray went to send for a Cash On Delivery transaction with his buyer. Coming home to COD, Ray gave me money to sell things. I received the cash and saved it to pay for our school fees and daily necessities. As soon as my heart trembled to see him, I was angry but still loved the man I had been with for 8 years. I asked him if he needed money for gasoline when he served to Bandung later, he also refused. I really feel sorry for him.

“ Pap, I'm sorry that all this time I can't be a good wife to you. Sorry I can not meet all your expectations, I was too busy with the children “, I said gently holding his hand.

“ Yes same, sorry I can not be a good husband and father for the children “, replied Ray while stroking my hair. I know this apology came out of his deep and sincere heart. Unlike yesterday at my in-laws' house, Ray is softer with me now.

“ Pap you why the hell, indeed we can not start again from zero?” all this time we are always tested and then we can rise again “, I said while sobbing.

“ Can't Ran, I already thought this was mature. Kids' relationships should grow with parents who are no longer in line “ argues again.

“ Not in line what is pap?, which is not in line? Marriage is not exactly the same as each other. Someone must give in to each other and always learn to dampen their egos ” each, I replied as I continued to hold my husband's hand.

“ Oh hard is the clarity of Ran, want to be explained rich if you do not understand. I ask you to help me understand my condition now. I need to focus on solving all my problems. Everything is tangled Ran, KUSUT!!! “

“ Precisely I love the children, I do not want them affected by all my problems. You can understand “, he said again.

I heard Kian crying in his bed. With a sagging step and a still limp knee I grabbed it. I carried her body with all my might, my hands trembling from the conversation with Ray just now.

“ Pap, I don't know what to say with you. I am still confused and do not understand what really happened. I ask you please don't hurt me anymore, kasian Kiana he had to drink a lot of ASI “, I asked to clear up so that Ray ended all these conversations. I hope he will be devastated and think everything well. The presence of Kiana should be able to melt her heart in order to knit the household as usual.

“ Precisely it is. I love Kiana, Kica and Kila. I love them very much and you know that. I have to release them from all the burdens of my life “ he replied as he stood up from the bed and stroked Kiana who I carried in my arms.

“ I'm sorry Rania, from today I'm talak you “ yelled steadily while kissing my head.

My crying broke instantly. Kiana almost sagged from my sling, but I held it with all my might. Ray kissed Kiana and tried to grab her, he carried her and approached Kiana as he walked to the corner of my room.

I was still crying in my room, all the emotions overflowing and as if coming out through my tears. For months I tried to hold the pain, now Ray as if sowing salt on a wounded heart. Today was exactly 3 weeks Kiana was born, the stitches of the operation on my stomach just haven't dried. He steadily dropped talaq while I was still in the puerperium.

“ Sorry yes Ran, you are a great woman. I'm sure you'll be strong “, she said while stroking my hair. He then went down to the family room with Kian, leaving me to struggle with all the pain that I only felt alone.

Afternoon

“ Mam, said papa I want to buy new toys later tonight “ screams Kica who broke into the door of my closed room.

“ Oya, what toys son? I asked my enthusiastic son while jumping into my bed.

“ Yes mama again the same eye pain again colds too. Kica far away yes let gauntangmama “, I told a lie so that my son did not know his mother was crying for hours. I just slept with Kian in the room, my body was limp and no appetite.

“ Well mama is sick yes, yaudah I am equally papa if that. He said papa wants to go to Bandung again, ma? “, asked Kica back to me. This time the question was really hurtful. I have to tell them that the papa will never come back by our side.

“ Yes I want papa to go again, Kica, Kaka and Kian the same mom at home “, I said while again holding back tears.

“ Dad papa go again. Papa goes on, if the money is already a lot later papa ga go to Bandung again right ma?”, he asked innocently.

“ Pray with God son, so that papa has a lot of windfall and can gather with us again “, I replied while stroking my son's head.

My son just grinned at my answer, then he jumped out of the bed and ran out of my bedroom. The children were so innocent, they should not be the victims of a farewell. Moreover, Kila and Kica are very close to her father, since childhood Ray actively participated in the care of children. Ray often took his time for them, even going out with just Kila and Kica so I could clean up the house. Since the kids, Ray could put on diapers and change clothes, she said, She did not hesitate to feed them in the mall, wait outside the toilet if they wanted to pee, buy them toys that had been targeted and some things that some husbands did not do to their children. I have to admit he's a good father, a pleasant father and always agree with what children ask for. I never thought Ray would drop his talons and have the heart to leave his kids.

Day

“ Ran tipped yes, this is a toy for Kila and Kica “, he said in my room while I was breastfeeding Kiana. It seems he ran out from the outside and stopped by to buy toys for my kids. There were two boxes of toys Ray bought for the children. The large box is a Pony doll and its houses, the small one is a pair of walkie talkies to play together. This toy he bought at a store near the house, because the money is limited he bought according to the budget he has.

“ Thanks ya pap, children must be as cool as you buy toys “, I replied softly.

“ I keep in the bed deck, so tomorrow morning they can see the toys directly. I installed the battery also kok “, he said while keeping the toy next to the bed of children.

“ You want to go where tomorrow pap “, ask me slowly.

“ I'm going to Bogor. I should have left today but it was a shame. What will be the middle of the mall yes I go “, the answer while opening the closet door and taking clothes and putting in her bag.

“ Already malem pap, tomorrow you leave. Please, you menemenin children first here “, force me so that Ray does not directly leave the house tonight.

“ Yes, I leave tomorrow at dawn. I also just cape out of business with my team was “, he replied with a smile at me.

“ You have not eaten ya pap, I bought in aceh noodles yes “, I said while getting up and buttoning my clothes.

I took my phone at the dressing table and ordered via the application two servings of fried aceh noodles and Ray's favorite egg martabak. Mi aceh is our midnight menu while watching movies on Netflix. Ray and I love watching movies, whether it's Netflix or movies without kids. Similarly, children who are very happy to watch streaming movies on Ray's laptop. Without having to go to the cinema they are quite satisfied to be able to watch while enjoying the popcorn I made. Yes, happiness should be simple, but now it all feels complicated.

Ray just finished packing his shirt. After the Isya prayer he then went down and took orders for the aceh noodles that had arrived. In an instant he brought a plate and a spoon into the room so we could eat together. We sat on the floor enjoying the deliciousness of our favorite dish, the smoke from the noodles was still billowing and the aroma was gushing into my nose. Ray prepared a serving of noodles and gave them to me.

“ Eat a lot of Ran, you are tired of looking at “, he said while giving the plate to me. I recognized that gaze, the dear gaze of a Rayendra Saputra was still left.

“ Thank you for treating me to Ran”, he said back with a sincere smile.

I didn't answer all of his words. I just fell silent as I put noodles in my mouth. The noodles are delicious, my stomach is hungry, but my appetite has gone. I eat only solely for the sake of Kiana, for the sake of ASI production that I have to keep for her.

“ If you have finished eating you sleep only Ran, let me get it done. Tomorrow at 4 I have to go to Bogor and then to Bandung. If the children find me, tell them to call me yes “, he said while cleaning up his empty plate.

I put my empty plate on the floor, I let Ray clean it all up. Ray swiftly wiped the scattered noodle crumbs and stored all the dishes into the kitchen. I went straight to my little bed with Kiana. Ray must have slept with the kids on the big bed. I tried to close my eyes before Ray came, I wanted to close my eyes and hope all this was just a nightmare.