Mr Love Love
Love Without Self

A party?

The party is over but my mind is still there. Really, I've never felt this big before. I feel claustrophobic, I feel annoyed, I want to curse. The question is, who should I look up to? I want to scream. Screaming loudly.

Ever since Sabina and I set foot in our house. Until now after we finished praying Isya in a congregational manner, there was no more smile or reprimand from Sabina. I was scared, so scared that I couldn't speak.

Ten minutes passed but there was no sign of Sabina going out of the bathroom. Did he know about my relationship with his cousin until he decided he wouldn't come out of the bathroom just to torture me? Many times I also paced in the room while staring at the bathroom door that was still perfectly closed.

"I'll knock on the bathroom door, I don't care if Sabina curses me." I said slowly with a downcast face.

Just now I was intending to turn around, my shoulders held from behind, this time not another woman like at the party before, but Sabina the jelly-eyed saliha woman.

"How long ago will you."

Glekkk!

My words were stuck in my throat as soon as I saw Sabina, I could only swallow the saliva. My eyes are round in disbelief, I don't know what dream I had last night to see Sabina look like that. Honestly, it feels like my blood is flowing ten times faster. All my body was shaking violently. My pent-up desire suddenly appeared on the surface.

What was I thinking? I muttered in my heart as I stared at Sabina's soft cotton-soaked lips.

"Why look at me like that? Does this look weird?" Sabina asked as she put both her hands around my neck.

I smiled happily, I'm sure at this time my face started to blush as red as boiled shrimp.

"That's not weird. That's sexy." I replied quietly without letting go of a smile.

I don't know the name of the clothes Sabina was wearing. What was clear, that piece of cloth that looked like a mosquito net was a gift from Mama, a gift that previously gave Sabina great goosebumps and threw her until it hit my handsome face.

"Since the party, I've seen your face look upset. I want to ask what's wrong with him? Too bad, I can't do that because I'm afraid it'll hurt my heart.

When we got home, I found that these clothes were still in the closet. Then I thought, can this outfit eliminate my husband's fret and fidget? The answer is probably no, even if I still want to try." Said Sabina while cupping my face with her warm hands.

Truly, restless, agitated, and my fear seemed to evaporate into space. I can't even speak to flatter the most beautiful woman in the world, Sabina Wijaya.

"Do you know you're teasing me right now?" I asked Sabina with a naughty tone of voice.

"Yes." Yeah." Reply Sabina briefly.

"just yeah? You're so easy to say, how about I get out of control looking at this sexy look of yours?"

"Do whatever you want 'cause tonight's ours."

After getting the green light from Sabina, eventually all of these flavors would come together into one. Without a second thought I lifted Sabina up, carrying her to our bed.

This is what halal love is, it comes not just to be happy. But in it there are piles of rewards. May Allah bless us with descendants that can cool our eyes.

...***...

Beautiful morning, when I woke up I saw the best face. Being in his arms always makes my soul feel great happiness.

This morning we even took a shower together, although this seemed strange and unusual. This habit can actually glue the relationship husband and wife.

Taking a bath together has been exemplified by the Prophet and his wives. In other words, Islam considers this a form of reasonableness. Bathing together can cause affection and play with a partner, flush each other and laugh off each other.

This is the Sunnah that can not only link the heart and make love between couples increase, but also in the promise of a great reward in the world and in the hereafter.

"Mas, I want to say something." Sabina said as she hugged my body from behind. I smiled as I stopped putting on the tie.

"Stay like this, don't move, and don't look back." Sabina continued again while tightening her embrace and not letting me look at her pretty face.

Actually this morning I wanted to tell you about Reem. My intention, I paused after hearing Sabina's heavy tone of voice.

"What's wrong? Is there a problem? Or did I make a mistake? Tell me so I can fix everything." I said softly while stroking and then kissed the back of Sabina's hand.

"Now there's no problem, but it'll be a problem if I don't say it."

Glekkk!

I swallowed Saliva hearing Sabina say, I felt slapped. It was as if her brief remark urged me to tell her about my past with her beautiful cousin.

"Mas Araf still remembers Mas Ikmal? Now Mas Ikmal is the new Professor at my college. I'm saying this because I don't want Mas Araf to misunderstand us if someday I accidentally get involved with him.

Mas Araf doesn't have to worry about anything, as a Muslim I know my limits. I will not break the line that I cannot break, I promise I will always try to be a good wife. Mas Araf also had to promise me that Mas Araf would be a good husband.

If we both try, I'm sure we'll be able to run the Sakinan, Mawaddah, and Warohmah households." Sabina said at length.

Sabina's words felt like raindrops drenching the bottom of my heart, I was happy. So happy that I shed tears. Even without asking, I will always be a good husband, today and forever.

I slowly turned my body towards Sabina, looking at her pretty face without taking a smile off my handsome face. There was nothing lacking in my life, a beautiful and kind wife was already within my grasp, even if thousands of women of Morgiana Reem Ayslay class came to me, it will never change my heart.

I love you selflessly, sad you, happy you, even your tears are all mine. I'm not gonna let you stay away for a second. I'll make sure I always make you mine. Even if I was reborn I would always look for you and make you my soul mate. I muttered inwardly as I tightened my embrace on the slender body of Sabina Wijaya.

...***...