Nackal Duda
Fear of Dance

Gnats

Dance was busying herself in the kitchen. Help the chef prepare the food stock for the week of tomorrow. She was drinking her pregnant milk while occasionally holding her sore waist. Poor thing, he must be tired all day.

"Is there anything I can help you with? You seem really tired. Rest in the room!" my orders.

"You're home yet? How'd it go?" tanya Dance.

"We talked in the room. Let's go upstairs." I don't want the employees of Tari to know more of the problems we're having. From the way Tari closed the cafe it was clear that they must be wondering what had happened to our household.

Dance went to her room. I followed from behind and when I got in the room I hugged myself tightly. Unexpectedly, Dance let go of my embrace.

I remember the dream that haunted me a while ago. Dream that Dance cuts hair, dream that dance goes and wakes up with sweat pouring.

It turns out that the meaning of the dream is a severe problem will befall our household. Right at the moment we should be happy because we are going to welcome our first child.

"How did it go?" ask Dance without further ado at all. His face looked so tense and tried to cover up all the anger within him.

"His pregnancy was 20 weeks. Definitely not my son, is it?" I said with a satisfied smile.

"Who said? Could it be the calculation of the doctor when the last time he finished menstruating? Everything is still possible if it's your child." The smile on my face disappeared. I was silent hearing it.

Where did Tari convince me yesterday that she believes the boy is not my son? Why does he look so doubtful now?

"Don't tell me you believe what Vira said?" my many.

"If Abi had been right and not carelessly sleeping with someone else's daughter, I would have loudly said that I was sure it wasn't Abi's. But, looking at Abi's past and the many women around Abi, the confidence in me slowly began to disappear. Moreover, the age of the womb is still possible if it is indeed the son of Abi. What if later when the DNA test proved that the child was Abi's child? That is, Vira's son and the child in my womb are sisters. Abi ever think about how I feel? The son of my enemy is the brother of my own son. The more I think, the more I feel like this matter is so heavy!"

"So Vira even tried to turn off the cafe business. Fortunately I had expected it that no rumors about this cafe made him poisoned have spread widely. This is just slander, not yet his parents who intervened Bi. What if Abi was really the father in Vira's womb and his parents sued and put Abi in prison? Did Abi ever think long of all that?" The dance began to sob and I began to ignite her emotions.

"I'm not the boy's father! I am sure of myself. I'm sorry for all the trouble with my bad past. If I could change the time I would go back in time and not be such a bad guy again. If I could turn back the clock, I would look for you because I know you're going to change my life for the better. But I ask you please believe me. I'm not the boy's father! Please, you are the only one I love right now. Trust me!" without me noticing I was speaking by raising my tone of voice.

I cried a mouthful, shedding the tears I had been holding back from before. "I'm sorry... I'm sorry I talked to you like that." I approached Tari and was about to hug her but she threw my hand back. I don't want to touch it at all.

Jegerr.....

Dance asking for divorce?

"No! I don't want to! Don't you ever say those words again! L'm... I will never divorce you! Don't you ever think I want to replace you with Vira! Never will!" I said firmly.

"Me! I don't want to share a husband with Vira! Let me give up! Let me go! Let me give up on your happiness! Hua.... " Tari sits limp on the bed crying.

I hugged him, though he thrashed and always threw me in my arms I didn't care. I still want to hug him. I also cried with him.

"I will not abandon the woman I love only for the sake of a snake like Vira. I ask you, please don't ask me to divorce you please.... I'm not gonna do it! I don't want to lose you! Please.." I asked sobbing. "Please..don't do that!"

The dance that had been crying since hitting my chest was no longer hitting my chest. He buried his head and cried in my arms.

I tightly hugged the woman who wanted to leave this side of me. I don't want to lose him. He's too precious to let go and I'm not sure if I can still spend the rest of my life without this woman again.

"We're all dealing with this together... I do not want this situation to make us separate, so divided and instead want to leave each other. I don't want to lose you, we want to welcome our son. You want to be called Mommy and I want to hear my son call me Abi. So, we must fight for the happiness and wholeness of our household." I said as I stroked her hair gently.

"I don't know if I'm going to be able to deal with all this or not. I'm not that strong when I'm dealing with Vira. I've been fighting it for a long time and I lost. This time, what else does he want to take away from me in my life? Rather than me losing everything, I'd rather give up."

"God! Don't tell me you're going to lose everything. You won't lose anything. Trust me the same. I'm not going to let you lose everything you have right now, because what you have is what I have too. You're too precious and I don't want to let you go just for the sake of that damn woman!" I said with emotion.

I let go of my embrace towards Tari and raised her face so that we could look each other in the eye. "You can see from the look in my eyes that are filled with this conviction. Don't you ever leave me. Going to the end of the world I will pursue your love. So, I ask you to be patient and continue to pray for me. I believe your prayers are even more powerful than anything else. For God has sent it down!"

"There is no power and effort other than to ask the Creator. You taught me about your trust in God. How God loves you so much and gives you every prayer you pray. I also believe in God, I am sure God will grant my prayers as well. We strengthen each other, we support each other and we work together. Me, you and our future son. We will not be separated. If there were a thousand like Vira even in this world, it wouldn't be able to separate us."

I wiped her tears and kissed her forehead. While inwardly praying, so that this beautiful woman does not give up on the situation even though old wounds continue to shadow her.

***