Not the Surrogate Mother
Not giving up

"Just go ahead, Kai. I don't have much time. I just wanted to see Kailani and the kids. Just want to treat the taste of kangen. Although it turns out these kangen even more when they see their faces. It's a lie that I have to say I'm better off away from them" Kalvin said as soon as he and Kailandra reached the designated room.

"I'm sorry, Vin. I am too selfish. I shouldn't have asked you and Karina to stay away from our lives. Just like you, I am also a nobody to Kailani. I shouldn't have banned another man from approaching her." Kailandra drew a wry smile at the end of his sentence.

"I can't resist or resist your wishes, Kai. If I wanted to, clearly refuting your ridiculous desires was an easy matter. It's just that Karina should be my priority right now. Kailani's problem, if there really is God's destiny for us, no matter how great the obstacles are, no matter how wide the distance is stretched to separate, there must always be a way to unite and reunite us."

Once again Kailandra smiled. In his heart he had to admit that Calvin had a heart and a mind wider than his own. Of all that Kailandra has experienced, and the death of Love yesterday as its peak - the man is increasingly aware of how previously he was a very selfish human being.

"I'm sorry, Vin. I'm really sorry. I may have changed your life direction a lot. Whether it was because of Karina or Kailani. Especially the Karina issue. I shouldn't have washed my hands and let him get to his lowest point. Thank you for always being there for Karina, Vin." Kailandra looked at his interlocutor with eyes so shady. The arrogance that has often been displayed seems to disappear without a trace.

"Thank God you realized it, Kai. But don't worry, Karina is my responsibility. No one will blame you or hold you accountable for Karina. As soon as your talaq falls, it's gone your obligations and rights over him."

Kailandra rubbed his face violently. Hearing Kalvin's words just now, it felt like he was getting embarrassed by his arbitrary attitude all this time. So many other people's feelings that he sacrificed for his own ego.

"Vin, I hope it's not too late. Can I meet Karina?" So careful and hopeful when Kailandra asks that question.

"For what?" cynical Kalvin. "It's impossible for you to go back to Karina, isn't it? He's setting his heart. So far it has improved. You don't have to come just to give hope and make Karina hurt again" he added, firm and straightforward.

"Yes, you're right, Vin. I didn't go to Karina to bring her back. I feel like I'm taking part in what's happened to him. My mother died bringing disappointment and perhaps even hatred to me. Now I am afraid of my own attitude. I'm sorry, too, because I haven't had time to apologize." Kailandra turned his face to the opposite side of Kalvin. Hiding his teary eyeballs because of a puddle of clear circles that have been jostling want to come out.

"I'll consider first. I've taken the trouble to get Karina to this point. Before allowing you to meet her, I have to make sure that your intentions are really good.I don't want to, by bringing you together, Karina will instead return to the point where she still expects you."

Kalvin smiled faintly. "Are you sure, Kai?" tanyakanya.

"I've never been this sure before. My attitude is very unfair, to you, Kailani, even Keiko. You're right, I should have thought more logically. Whether or not there is you, if indeed we are a match, surely no matter how small the possibility, there will be a way for us to be united. It's not that I give up, I just don't want to push things around anymore."

"I really appreciate your attitude right now, Kai. It's good you're starting to realize. Not everything can go our way. Never disappointed, does not mean we have to raise the ego more. One thing that even though we always remember, is actually not only we who have feelings. Other people can also feel the same heartache because of our attitude."

Kailandra nodded in agreement with Kalvin's statement just now. "Fight, Vin! Kailani could be your soul mate. I will not stop you from approaching him. I'm just asking, don't use Keiko to take Kailani's heart. Again I say, instead of giving up, I just want to go through it all with more flow. After all, Kailani is the mother of my three children. I lied if I didn't expect him to choose me."

"Kailani deserves to be happy, Kai. With you, with me or with others. Raising three children alone is not easy" Kalvin said.

"My life will never be enough just to make Kailani happy, Vin. The mistakes and heartache I've made are too great. The presence of children is not a reason for us to be together. But they deserve a full family. Kailani will not be alone raising them. I will take full responsibility for them. Financially and morally."

Kailandra paused his speech for a moment. The man looked at his interlocutor closely. "Kailani can live a new life with any man. But between us we can't break up communication anymore. There are children who will forever need us as their mothers and fathers."

"Then try harder, Kai. You know for sure, I'm not going to use sneaky ways to get rid of the people I consider my competition. Anyway, I'm still thinking logically. There will always be you between me and Kailani. Because there are three children who bind you. I'll try as much as I can in my own way. For me Kailani is not a trophy that must be contested by justifying all means. Getting Kailani is not a victory. Where in victory there is only euphoria. It's not like that."

"One more time, Vin. I'm not giving up. I'm just tired of following my own ego. Mama said, I will never be happy because I always denied my mother's will. I don't want Kailani getting carried into my mama's words. Let me try my best for the kids. Kailani once said, I have failed to be a child and also a husband. I don't want to add to my failures anymore because I can't be a good father."

Without Kalvin and Kailandra knowing, almost half of the talks are done, not only they are listening. Someone who had wanted to take something in the room they were in, participated in the conversation.