Short Stories of Islamic Love
Behind the Reason

My smile was still beaming, remembering about the togetherness of me and Ka. In the beautiful twilight yesterday afternoon, how handsome Ka is with a modern looking Ka style found me at home. Ka asked for Umi and Abah's permission to take me for a polite walk in each speech. I was embarrassed and proud of Ka's seriousness, which this time was braver about marriage with Abah. It's just that Abah's slightly hanging answer made me pensively on the road when Ka hugged me on his big bike.

“What, right said Abah, our relationship may be too fast to be taken to a more serious level” said Ka realized my residence.

“Ka ready to wait for Ica anytime” plus Ka to make my cheeks smile shyly.

Ka, always makes me calm behind every polite speech.

We, met a few months ago. At that time we accidentally followed the same reading community. Ka who stood out with her speech made me fall in love at first sight. My silence, harboring a sense of admiration for his sociable figure, the way a smile that made lines in his eyes made me often caught paying attention to him. I just looked down when our eyes met each other. A week later, we returned each other with smiles, started talking even though they were just greeting each other by name. I was even confused to call his name which said it was difficult in my mouth that could not say said R. Ka laughed as I greeted her with a sizable name call.

“Quite call Ka. I'm older than Ica” he said realizing my cheeks were flushed.

We're getting closer, 2 months we've been in a friendly relationship. You pay more attention to me, and vice versa. Ka often picked me up in college, gave me various types of food because my food portion is quite large inversely proportional to my body that looks so thin. Several times I visited Ka's house which is quite large, I am not so surprised, the way Ka dress does describe the condition of the Ka family which is quite rich.

The twilight this time was different for me, Ka squatting in front of me made me blush in shame at Ka's actions that never occurred to me. She carried a beautiful white rose in her hand. With a narrowed smile he looked at me with a slightly irregular breath. Ka reasoned he was nervous, he even ran from the car park to my place which was quite far away.

“Ica, Ka like the same Ica. Ka may not be the best for Ica, but if possible, Ka will try to be the best for Ica” Ka said making me almost shed tears.

I'm nodding.

The knock on the bedroom door woke up my daydream about Ka. Abah called my name from behind the door of my room that I had deliberately locked from the inside.

“Wear nice clothes. Your veil is also you wear the same shame as the candidate besan” said Abah, I cringe not understand, want me to ask some things to Abah, just Abah immediately shuffled just like leaving my room.

Balloon candidate? A lot of questions filled my brain. Did Ka?, I thought that made me smile to myself. Some clothes in the closet I just threw. I want to look neat in front of my inner Ka. My style in front of the glass to the right to the left makes me sometimes giggle alone so strange. My choice was for a frilly white robe with a matching pasmina veil.

I walked out into the living room to see my brother. Ah my heart almost jumped out so nervous. I gawked, as my feet came among the people gathered in my house. There's no Ka there, nor are Ka's parents I've met before. There were only Abah and Umi, as well as 4 other people whom I had never even met before. Everyone looked at me with smiles on their faces. I just kept quiet, still not understanding what's going on right now.

“Ca sit next to Umi mu” Abah said wiping the silence between us.

I comply. My attention was on a man of my age who kept looking down as I looked at him probing. It has been almost 30 minutes Abah, Umi, and others have talked here and there. Only me and the man kept quiet, or was it just me who did not understand the situation that was going on?.

“Abah” called me, as soon as the warm conversation between them came to a halt. Everyone was on me, except for that guy who was still looking down.

“This is Umi Nur and Abah Idi, and this is Teh Ni, they are father, mother and sister of Nak Adam” said Abah as if to understand my call for an explanation.

“Abah and Umi want to match you” now it's Umi's turn to make my heart will be dislodged.

I just kept quiet. My mind's mixed. I really want to oppose Abah and Umi, only I do not dare and feel bad for guests who have come to my house far away. I thought Ka, what about Ka? What about our dreams?. I looked down, holding back the crying.

—

“That Ica has Ka. You are kind, polite, and also from a well-off family. Ica must be happy” I said holding back tears.

“Change and Umi tau. Abah just wants Ica not to choose the wrong step later. Wedding is not a mess lohh~”

“Ka will have everything Abah” pekikku interrupted crying.

“Nak Adam smart Agama” pekik Umi.

I bowed, unable to answer. My relationship with Ka was almost 5 months, only I never saw Ka perform prayers and also teach in front of me.

“Ka may also be religious smart. It's just that Ica never saw it” my whisper that even I believe was not heard at all by Abah and Umi.

“Serah Ica. Abah and Umi just want the best for Ica” said Umi, then just passed by leaving me. Abah also passed.

The news of my marriage spread to Ka's ears. Dusk as usual Ka knocked on my bedroom window, unlike Ka who always asked for permission if she wanted to meet me. I was in a fast puff when Ka knocked on my window over and over again. We were silent after a few minutes passed, Ka continued to look at me with an unquantified look. I looked down, apologized and got hurt.

“What's wrong, Ka understand. Ica can't argue Abah and Umi” said Ka, increasingly making my cry break. In my heart, I want you to keep me. Ask Abah to stop this one-sided matchmaking. But Ka, he was too understanding. Or maybe you don't want to keep me. I kept crying in sobs. She kept watching me from behind the window I opened, she made no sound or cried.

“Ica, You obey the religious beliefs you profess. So is Ica kan ..” said Ka made me look at him.

“Maybe this is the best for us. Ica with the faith. Ka so ..” added Ka which makes my question answered.

“Ka not at all with Ica?” many reassuring.

Ka nodded. The deeper the wound scratches, the more possibilities for this matchmaking to take place. The reason that I hope you can speak with Abah, against Abah and Umi well, is as extinct as it is.

Adam was a good man. He has a polite conversation like Ka. He was handsome, tall, and hardworking. Adam never left the obligatory prayer, dhuha prayer and tahajud never missed from the list of obligations. Every Monday and Thursday I never found Adam eating the breakfast I made, the magrib he just drank water and a few dates. Adam is also active in the management of the mosque every Friday’at. Many things amaze me about a man who matches my husband's status. It's just that Ka's shadow can't be removed. As good as Adam's treatment was to me, I remained silent. My daily activities only serve eating, praying and sleeping. Our conversation can be counted on the fingers, or even just Adam talking to me. Adam still smiled, behind my limp face at the thought of Ka every day.

I thought about the decision of Umi and Abah who married me to Adam who has a social status from a simple class. Adam's work as a construction worker and teacher, only able to meet the needs of our kitchen and electricity. If you look at it from Ka, it is inversely proportional. My eyes seemed to be closed to the excess of Ka, Adam's good attitude was just a cross-line that was missed in my picture.

“Umi why match Ica with Adam?” I asked Umi.

“Instead of saving excuses, Ica will someday tau”

Reason. Until now I have not found it. The reason why I should be happy with Adam. All the reasons that are in my brain are just Ka. Ka, and always Ka.

Dawn had dawned, early in the morning Adam had left me to look for rupiah as a building porters. My daily routine is still the same, just sleeping, eating and daydreaming. There's nothing special about my married life, I still don't talk much, while Adam's still good to me.

Some people walked to my house in a hurry. I could see it clearly from the glass window of my room. My eyes were staring at a familiar figure being lifted by some men with faces that were grimacing in pain. I panicked, running towards the person I believed to be my husband.

“You why?” I was worried for Adam who was lying on the bed.

“I fell down the stairs, it's okay soon to be healed” he said forcing a smile, but still I see clearly the pain that he can not hide.

“It's okay. You can't walk, this is seriously my angry” that was responded to with Adam's smile widened.

“I'm glad you're worried” said Adam, making me stare inexplicably at his figure who is still trying to treat me well.

Two weeks passed, Adam's condition did not improve. Adam still can't walk, I'm getting frustrated. Plus the financial condition that there is no input and also the treatment of Adam who spent a lot of money. I cried in the bathroom, abused me who could not resist my match with Adam. Instead of being happy, I'm getting harder because Adam can't walk. For two weeks I was almost completely unable to sleep. Regret and anger were on me, I was thinking more and more about Ka. Missing her, imagining the happy life I would have if I had married Ka first. I felt guilty for Adam, behind his trials I still missed another man.

Adam was still smiling, and he treated me well. I often cried in front of him because he was tired, he kept apologizing. His good treatment made me want to leave. Every time Adam still continues to pray, only fasting on Monday Thursday can not he run as before. Adam never made it difficult for me, I made it harder. My lack of acceptance of the condition made me even more frustrated and give up.

“Ca Ica kok nangis” shouted Adam heard the sound of my crying which now I can not control as usual.

“Im sorry Mas, Ica so it's getting harder” he said in a vibrating voice. I'm increasing the rhythm of my crying, no matter how many meters away it sounds.

“I'm tired” I said as I walked towards Adam whom I met crying. My heart was sliced, I only met a manic Adam for one year of our marriage.

“Sorry I can't be happyin Ica” added Adam while holding my hand. I looked at Adam's face, too much anger at him, too much regret in my mind at him. But he still understands and thanks God. I've never met her lamentation, her pain. I don't understand the good human figure in front of me. But still, I still couldn't accept it, receiving all the good treatment towards me.

One third of the night I woke up, I panicked to see Adam who was not in bed. I was afraid that something might happen to Adam, but his figure I now reach prostrate to the omnipresent in his long, shabby prayer mat that I like.

“Ca” calls him to notice me who has awakened. He smiles.

Adam held the wall as a support to stand. I gawked, holding back tears to meet Adam who was now standing in front of me.

“Look, mas can stand now” he said, I shed tears. My heart trembled, thanking God for the healing I had with Adam for so long. I approached Adam, hugging him while crying on his shoulder. A happiness I've never felt in my entire life.

“Sorry mas, I'm too mean to you” my isak is tight.

Adam stroked my back. As if to return my statement to him. I know he is a forgiving man. How angry I am, my regrets, he always forgives me. A person who should make me happy and grateful that I have.

Behind reason, destiny

I found her

The simplicity I learned

Selfless sincere behavior

Thank goodness to God

And the sincere love of ordinary men

“Mas want to ask what is Ica?. All this time Ica has not been able to be a good wife”

“Mas want Ica to wear veil”

“Isn't it the husband's responsibility to get a wife closer to him?”

I nodded, a simple request but of special value.