Wedding Dust's
41. Nadya Ayunda
...I don't know who's wrong, I don't know......
...This part is a little Twenty-one ples....
...If you are not comfortable, skip okay?...
...Happy reading...
...🌹🌹🌹...
I decided to follow Hansel's advice by going to his hotel because the distance was not too far away. But still, our clothes were soaking wet, and Bagas gave me a clean stel to wear.
“If you have just returned home. Here also there is no raincoat.” he said trying to provide other solutions that sound quite acceptable common sense.
Just then, after hearing someone say my name, I pulled Hansel and quickly left Solaria, asking Hansel to drive the bike and I was in the bonceng. Everything I do is because I panic. That voice, is the voice of Juwita—adik Bagas.
“Indeed why you suddenly went from there. Look at the devil, force me out and hit the rain. What if you get sick after this rain? Next time don't be careless, Nad.” scolds Bagas warning me to be more careful and not to take unfavorable decisions for myself.
“Sorry. But I can't love you the reason why I'm like that.” replied I asked for understanding from him.
Hansel was sitting on the bed that was also my seat. He grabbed my still-cold palm, and grasped it with his large, warm palm. “Nothing. If you are tired, sleep. Later if it has stopped raining, I wakein.”
I refused with a headband. “You're the one who's sleeping. Tomorrow we have to go back to Jakarta, right?”
“Sore. So no problem.” he said casually while gently patting the back of my hand. “You want to walk again, tomorrow?”
“Ngak. Enough today. I don't want anyone to see me with you.” reject me as relevant.
Hansel got up, headed for the freezer and poured a glass of cold water for him to drink. “I did not expect also we will be one room like this, in addition to the office.”
Idiotically. Why did I end up here. Am I impressed cheap now?
“Don't macem-macem.” threatens me fiercely so that Hansel does not act recklessly.
Hansel smiled slantedly and walked back over, then sat down next to me.
“Kiss can you?” his god looks serious. I swear by anything, I'm a married woman, I know how to react to a man when his spirit is on the rise.
I tried to get up, but Hansel held my hand. Damnit. I'm willing not to get sorry from Bagas and get punished if until tonight we end up in bed.
“Where?” his voice began to crackle. My book crunched for fear of something that I did not expect.
“Sofa. I want to sleep there.”, I replied, hoping that he would let go of his hand checks on me.
Hansel laughing. “Narrow provision Nad. Here it is the same as me.”
“Don't be crazy. Remember our status—”
“Fuckbabies. And what does infidelity do other than seek each other tranquility and pleasure?”
I secretly hoped someone would come knocking on the door of this room so that I could take refuge from Hansel's figure who was shrouded in a fog of desire.
Whoever, I'm begging you to knock on that door...
“That's just your thoughts,” I said trying to keep looking calm so Hansel can't read my fear is too big.
“Ah, call my name kayak dong, Nad. You see, I got the wrong behavior last time you called me by the name.”
I shakes inexhaustibly.
“It was just a formality in front of that SPG. I don't want us to be seen as weird with other people.”
“We have been so in the eyes of others Nad. They've seen us with cheating lebel stuck to our forehead.”
“Stop! Never say that.”
“You continue to deny as if you do not enjoy this relationship that we live, Nad.” said Hansel to tear down my confidence that is still left behind a fingernail. I'm powerless. We are that despicable. “We both like, so what's wrong.”
“I told you, it's just your mind.” I said quickly and Hansel replied with a kiss on the lips.
God.
“Letas.” I shouted on the sidelines of a kiss that was still going on.
Unaccounted. The one with Hansel pushed me hard enough that I lay on my back on the bed with my clothes slightly blurred up to reach my waist. My movements were locked, Hansel overpowered me with a weight large enough for a skinny woman like me.
Justjust please. Anyone help me now. I regret choosing to run away from Juwita earlier.
I held back my voice so as not to peck Hansel's passion up. But it's all for nothing. She's getting more and more intense giving wet kisses on my lips. Until I felt the surface of her palm skin rise touching my stomach and chest.
“Lease!!!” my cry was loud, but muffled by her increasingly uncontrollable kiss. Stabbing, mumbling, and trying to knock our way in for our tongues to meet.
Gas, let's pick a path apart after this. And I'm sorry I couldn't take care of myself for you, for our wedding.
All the memories of Bagas were spinning randomly like a roll of crumpled cassette trying to be played back. Makes me like a woman who doesn't deserve to be loved by a good man like the man named Bagas.
I thrashed, once again trying to break away. Until I finally managed to push Hansel's chest with the remaining strength in me, then kicked him hard enough in the stomach area until he fell down on the floor with a hairy gray carpet.
My face pias after rising from the fear that made my heart almost jump out. I dared to look straight at Hansel's face, no matter if I had to take a hit or whatever it was because of his mistake.
But it didn't happen. Hansel got up and took a few steps back from me. He returned my eyes with a withered look. “Sorry, Nad. I—”
“Why are you doing this to me?” I asked for hoarseness among the cries that I could no longer bear.
“I love you, Nad. I'll be responsible if Bagas finds out and divorces you.”
A sash I gave to her the savage. “If you think I will just give myself up, you are wrong.” I said, cruel without feeling. Let it be, it's been bad, you're ruined. “If you really love me, at least you can take care of me. Not even destroy me like this.” my word arbitrarily with the lebel embedded in me, along with my role, as a wrestler husband people. I don't care anymore about Bagas' assessment of me. Numbness, maybe that's the right word.
But Hansel looked earnest and did not take off the slightest hug on my body. “If that's what you want, I'll do it. Whatever it is for you to believe if I do love you sincerely from the bottom of my heart, Nad.” said he was seen grumbling. “Although you asked me to leave my family, I will.”
I was surprised enough that my crying stopped at once. Hansel's completely insane. Why would he be willing and willing to do that to release the one he loves for the sin of being human like me?
What is in my mind now, what is the fate of Bagas? What about Hansel's wife and son? And how do all those who love me feel, who I would betray if I knew the disgusting behavior I'm doing now? Ah, I really don't deserve to live. I'm just trash.
“Bagas won't know we're like this, Nad. You just have to keep this from him. So please, don't end our relationship.”
He once took the people I love, and I don't want him to do it one more time, which is to take you away from me.
I closed my eyes remembering what Bagas said back then. My heart ached, sick and tight at the same time. “Silence. Don't mention his name with your fucking lips.” I said sharply. Didn't want Bagas' name to come out of his lips.
I felt Hansel move back in agitation. Then, once again he walked closer. Although misgivings still enclose all inches of my heart and body, I can see at least Hansel's eye bead is no longer visible seeds gai-rah. For that stupid reason, letting Hansel again cut the distance that had been created between us. Maybe he already knew he was guilty. Then he tried to grab my hand which of course I kept rejecting. Hansel had gone too far, he went too far with just the despicable status he claimed. Then he spoke softly apologizing.
“Sorry Nad. I've been too much with you.”
I looked at him sharply, then grinned without bothering to think about this man's feelings.
“Sorry, save the apology for your child and wife only later when you arrive in jakarta.”
Feeling constantly rejected, Hansel grabbed my body and carried it into his arms. There, where I could hear Hansel's rapid heartbeat, I began to cry loudly. Spilling all the berserk things that hurt my pride.
And from this moment on, while still in Hansel's arms, I knew that...
Nadya Ayunda, me, is the name Bagas should remove from his life after this. The name that he must erase from his memory is like the dust that he must remove from his sanctuary a promise lived on.
A Nadya Ayunda, will never be worthy to be with Bagaskara Adewangsa. And Nadya is just dust in marriage. []
^^^to be continue.^^^
...🖤🖤🖤...
So, who's wrong?
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See you's.