You Don't Consider Me
2. FUNERAL PROCESS
The confusion of Lianah after listening to the words of Bibik Ninih just made his heart even more unruly, the sadness that was mixed into one made him even worse. It feels like Lianah wants to get more clarity from her Bible so that there is no more confusion in her.
“Sorry Li, Bibik Kai said that you used BPJS to treat your mother so that it made your mother's condition worse and resulted in your mother dying like now due to inadequate handling of totality. Though according to Bibik Ninih itself, we want to treat using BPJS or pay cash even though. That is not a problem, because life and death are governed by God. You see in-laws Bibik Ninih, use BPJS and alhmadulillah healthy, no problem when the condition used to be very severe.” Said Bibik Ninih who explained how some families respond to me at this time.
I paused for a moment and started talking to Bibik Ninih. “Whatever they say, it doesn't feel right to talk like that under the conditions they are today. If they don't care how their parents feel, I'm grieving. Why do we need to be burdened like this again? If I was right now using BPJS, – guess what would happen to me Bik later. Insults are certain.”
“You already know how Bibik Kai's attitude has been to you and your family. His talk is always hurtful, do not you care too deeply. Bibik Ninih talks like this so that you keep the proof of this payment, Bibik is just afraid there will be bad talk to you next. Bibik Ninih could not bear if it was true – really happened to you Dek.” The Bibik Ninih.
I could only cry after listening to the explanation from Bibik Ninih just now and tried to walk as hard as I could to get to the administration even though it felt so heavy.
“Excuse me Sir, I want to make payment for a patient on behalf of Ms. Unidah.” Said Lianah who was still crying nonstop, despite being accompanied by Bibik Ninih beside her to strengthen herself.
The administration officer immediately swiftly opened the data on the computer then asked Lianah who was in front of him. “On behalf of Mother Unidah, everything runs out eight million seven hundred thousand rupiahs. Will you pay cash or use a card?”
“Cash Sir.” Lianah answered briefly.
Lianah immediately took some money and gave it to the administrative officer, after a few minutes the officer asked Lianah again. “Sorry, Mom for Almh delivery. This Unidah mother needs an ambulance from the hospital or does not need?”
“Need.” Answer Lianah.
“If you want an ambulance from the hospital, it costs three hundred thousand rupiah.” Cetus administrative officer.
Lianah immediately added the money and gave it to the officer. “Please sit down first, payment will I process. I will call you Bu.” Said Mr. administrative officer who provides friendly service.
Bibik Ninih swiftly led Lianah to sit in the teruh chair and try to calm the pound. “Sabar Deck, patience. God will always be with us. This is a test for you, if you can accept all this patiently then you will rise in degrees. Insign in you can Dek.” Said Bibik Ninih who tried to comfort Lianah who was sad and troubled at this time.
Lianah smiled looking at Bibik Ninih's face that helped her from the beginning to the end of her mother's journey in this temporary world. “Family of patient Mother Unidah.” Call the administrative officer and Lianah immediately come forward and take all the evidence of the receipt given.
Without waiting for long, immediately Lianah and Bibik Ninih headed for the mortuary. There seemed all the brothers were still waiting in front with faces so sad without any conversation between them.
During the journey home, there was no talk at all in the ambulance. Just silently holding the sobs and gaze more towards the front with a blank look and no picture for the future should be how without a great figure that must leave them.
Arriving in front of the house, all relatives were waiting and the building with green color was plastered in front of the house. The sobs from all the families and neighbors sounded very and very clear in Lianah's memory at that time.
His body can no longer sustain all the burdens he is currently experiencing and the brak ….
Lianah was unconscious, right next to her mother's body in the living room. Previously Lianah had seen her beloved sister who had been with her crying incessantly, just this time her sister behaved like this. There was a feeling of pain in his heart looking at all these events so that his body resistance weakened.
“Dek ... Deck …. Wake up, you patient Dek.” Cetus Bibik Ninih who was next to me with the smell of oil – minyakan that felt so stinging on my neck.
I looked around with a face so limp. “Where's mom?” I asked quietly with a barely audible tone of voice.
Bibik Ninih was silent and could not answer the question from me just now, but from behind Bibik Ninih looked an elderly person came to us and said to myself. “Mbk, want to see his mother's face. This is for the last time, before we cover with a shroud.” Cetus the woman.
Degh …. I stayed silent for a long time trying to accept this very bitter reality, although I hoped that after realizing that what I experienced today was just a nightmare.
I got up and walked slowly towards the living room, which looked a lot Mother – Mothers crowding looking at my Mom's face. Step by step I walked slowly and I saw my mother was helpless, a very calm and cool face was plastered in front of me at this moment.
I hope time stops and I don't have to part with my beloved mother. “Already yes Mbk, we want to cover with a shroud.” Said one of the Mothers - Mothers who helped the process of using for the use of the shroud.
I just fell helpless to answer the question and stared near my mother's corpse without being able to speak. It felt like someone was holding me so tightly that my body was already unable to move at all.
Yasin and tahlil readings began to be heard in my ears. I follow the reading in my heart and hope very much that all sins – My mother's sins are forgiven as well as all her acts of worship are accepted. Do not forget that my mother's death may be solemn khotimah and the pain that has been experienced is the eraser of his sin.
My silence and the teardrops that kept flowing so fast, made a woman beside me say. “Don't weep constantly, pity your mother who witnessed all this. Please make sure your mother is not sad to see – children left behind.”
I didn't answer at all because my world was collapsing now but the small hand on the side that was holding me made my heart flinch this time. His grip was so tight and warm.