CUTS
NOT A FAULT...

I came to bring a cup of coffee for Abu then back to the kitchen. In the village we are taught not to sit when parents talk if not asked. "It's not polite to hear the parents' talk." Warning words that have been doctrinated for us from childhood.

I did not come to sit there but hearing tampa intentionally is certainly not a sin, right? Our house that is not too far from one room to another room certainly makes it easier for me to hear all their conversations.

Here I am now, behind the wall of the kitchen board I eavesdrop on their conversation. With the hope that Umi does not come suddenly and then catch me wet who was caught eavesdropping. If that happens, my ears have been hit by the flickering fingers of Umi who is wrinkled but still strong powerful.

"Assalamualaikum I say once again to Abu and Umi family. I along with some relatives came to the house of Abu carrying the trust of a young man named Muhammad Khalid who is my nephew who wants to propose the daughter of Abu and Umi named Cut Zulaikha."

I flinched, Abu looked at Umi and vice versa. While I was in the kitchen thinking hard about who Muhammad Khalid was, I never knew that man. How could he propose to me? I was confused, but soon Abu's voice called out to me.

"Cut, they came to ask you for their nephew Muhammad Khalid, do you know him?" Ask Abu.

I shook my head. Then they whispered something to Abu. Abu's face instantly flushed as it held in anger. Umi and I are certainly confused by the change in the face of Abu and it is very rare.

"I accepted the trust but all my decisions were left to my daughter. She's getting married so how's Cut, do you accept their proposal?" Abu asked while looking at me with different eyes and not his daughter if you do not know the purpose of the look.

"I'm sorry, but for now I don't want to get married. I want to get married if it's safe and my brother can come home from boarding school." Words from where is it? They must have thought hard to hear my answer. Abu's angry face is only seen when dealing with my brother. And I can confirm if this is related to him, too.

They sighed and then went stale a little before they finally lifted their feet from my house. Abu was sitting limp, Umi tried to calm Abu who looked very disappointed. "After he let us down now he wants to let his brother down. What kind of brother does he want his sister married by a man who is not clear about his life. Let alone feeding his wife and children, feeding for himself must beg the citizens for various reasons. If our son marries such a man it could be a widow prematurely."

"Why did Abu say such a thing? Shouldn't we say good things to our children?" Ask Umi slowly.

"Umi, our son wants to marry his sister to his comrade-in-arms. Would Umi want Cut to marry a guy like that? It is better not to marry than to have a husband whose life is always in fear. There is no happiness in your marriage with him. Abu sure tampa we know, Ilham also must have married. Umi be prepared if one day there are women and children here who claim to be wives and children of our sons." Abu got up from his seat and changed his clothes and returned to the rice field feeling disappointed.

I went back to cooking with Umi. Umi cooks in silence, Abu's words seem to have a lot of influence on Umi. I'm confused as to what. "The patient one." That's all I said.

"Umi's very patient, Cut. If Umi is impatient maybe your brother has died first at the hands of Umi. But Umi is still a mother, but it seems like your brother does not consider Umi's existence anymore. She even stepped over Abumu to find a husband-to-be for her sister. Worst husband-to-be ever given a brother to his sister in the world." I felt a deep disappointment from Umi's heart.

I just hope that I will not be tempted by the bad words Umi has to heart for my brother. Do not let my brother feel the pain of the punishment of the ungodly child on this earth.

For the first time we have seen firsthand how the contact took place. The army headquarters on the hill was hit by rebel bazookas. From the direction of the house I saw many soldiers from the base who came out with complete weapons towards the foothills.

"Stay down there no one wakes up." The screams of people I know. Although we rarely spoke, I still remembered his voice.

The sound of a barrage of guns still being heard then several trucks passed in front of us, I also saw a car with the writing I had seen in the hospital but this was a different color.

Every resident commits to reciting prayers in fear of a bullet breaking that could be the wrong target.

Almost two hours of contact with the gunfire occurred and by late afternoon after getting the order to return home from Rendra, we immediately rushed to leave the rice fields.

It was very dangerous to be there at the time. And the sea of soldiers again adorned my village. Looks like someone got hurt from them. The proof is that the motorized car drove quickly away from my village with escorts from several armored trucks.

The next day I saw a red and white flag being flown at half-mast by them. Some bow their heads. But after arriving at the rice field I heard that there were members of them who died yesterday. And what surprised me more was that the soldier who was hit by the bazooka shot was Eko with some of his friends.

Eko died following Miftah, the woman he loved dearly. They left before they were united. It is tragic the path of love. If it was me, would I be able to? I don't know, only God knows because all this time I haven't felt a feeling called 'love'.

The pursuit continues. Patrols are increasingly being carried out in my village. In fact they again increased the number of troops and re-established a post at the foot of the hill. "When will this war end, O God?" I ask myself.

"Ask Allah so that they realize this is wrong, ask for peace so that I can propose to you and you will not have to be afraid to accept me anymore."

"Huh????"

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