From: Sacrifice Of Ilyas
I can't afford to lie (Cerita Icha)

Finally, his philosophy began. The thing that makes me so strange is that the face of the chairman (Dina) is so pale and moody. I don't know what's going on. The opening was so crowded and the speech was brought by HMJ Chairman Dina and the Head of the Department. When the event began, our Faculty was so crowded on holidays. I worked behind the stage to see the flaws and the running of the show. All yesterday's problems I don't think about anymore. Surprisingly back then, Dina always saw me. When our eyes met, he avoided me. And the unexpected thing, Ilyas followed the show as a singing participant. He carries his guitar full of Sticer Anime. Everyone laughed at him because he was considered a Suram Wibu.

Because I can't stand it, I want to see it from the side of the stage. He closed his eyes and brought his mouth closer to the mic

"This song is for you, my light" Ilyas said on stage.

Many people who mocked him but not a few applauded. He did not start his song as the audience did a commotion. But when everything was quiet, he picked up a guitar and sang Kangen Band - sure your love I got. Somehow hearing it looked so sincere, and it made me shed tears. Until I didn't realize, it turned out that Joseph was also beside me watching Ilyas sing. Likewise the spectators, not one of them is noisy in the slightest.

Until finally shakes his last guitar, everyone claps. No one mocked him. But his bad habit before he left, he burned his cigarette on stage and left the stage. Our eyes meet each other. He was silent for a moment to see me but as soon as he held his cigarette and passed me. I don't want to be awkward like this anymore I want to talk to him. But when I turned towards Ilyas, I saw him he wiped his tears.

Was I wrong all this time not aware of his feelings ?.

In fact, all this time no one was close to him other than me.

Am I not that kind ?.

                                                                                                    ...*****...

In the evening, Ilyas' song rang in my head. Until I couldn't hold him back, I went to see him. I called Joseph and told him to take me to Ilyas' house. When the two of us arrived, fortunately the one who opened the door was Ilyas. At that moment, I slapped him on the doorstep.

"I hate you." I told him.

My feelings were so unstoppable that I slapped him.

"i know everything. You like me, but you never say it. You let me love Joseph. You think I won't accept you then ?. You even delivered it through the song hikss.." I continued while crying.

After slapping him, Ilyas kept quiet and said nothing.

Irritatingly....

"Sister, who's at the door ?. Not invited in ?" layla said that was behind her.

"Layla, go inside the room" Ilyas replied with a faint feeling.

Layla looks to obey her sister even though she looks worried. Ilyas stroked his cheek and said to me.

"the song is not for you. Come play slap me" he said to me and diverted his attention.

"Then you've been saying I'm your Light and you're the Dark Darkness what does that mean ?. You never said that to anyone but me Ilyas. I beg you this time be honest, all this because of you I got less focus !!!!" I snapped at ilyas.

"You're cruel ilyas, even when you were sick yesterday you didn't come just out of jealousy. At least come to me as a friend as before. I don't want us to be awkward like this, I want us to be like we used to be" Ilyas continued.

He just kept quiet and said nothing.

Really annoying....

"Ilyas, I'll repeat. I love Joseph whatever it is. For he has been my Secret Admirer and sacrificed for me. You also know that, right?. and it's not that easy to decide even for my best friend" I told him.

She looked at me with teary eyes. Just this first time, I saw Ilyas's face like this.

"then go, thank you for coming. In this way, I can calm down and be able to tell you" said Ilyas who looked furious.

"Aaku... Hating you Icha. Don't show up in front of me again" he continued, forcing the word.

He went into his house and closed the door. I who could not suppress my feelings could only relax my legs and sit in front of his house crying.

Joseph approached me and hugged me. He tried to calm me down but it wasn't easy. The loss of my only Friend during college that has helped and comforted me has been painful. And because of my selfishness, he hates me.

Why do I have to do this ?

Why did this feeling appear to her ?

I don't want any of this but, why should I be liked by Ilyas ?.

                                                                                                ...*****...

“Icha.... You okay ?” Ask one of the event organizers to me.

“I'm okay. Let's continue the show” reply me to them.

The festive event is finally about to begin. The stage was ready and the show started to take place again. At the end of the day I did not focus in the slightest, sometimes I was careless until I had to calm myself down. When the show finally closed and we waited for the chairman of HMJ, he was not around. We searched for him but we didn't find him. Not accidentally when I started looking for the chairman Dina, I found Senior Kak Kiki and Kak Rahman as well as Nuge and Ita.

"Did you see Dina ?" ask them.

"You mean the head of HMJ ?" ask Kiki to return.

"Yes. We wanted to close the show on stage but he wasn't there. The closing script is also he who holds it. What should I do ?" I started to get confused and panic.

"What is Icha ?. Is there a problem ?" joseph asked me who came to me.

I explained to her about Dina not being on the show.

"i saw earlier he came early in the morning while carrying the script on stage. He looked glum and left the stage. What's the matter, actually ?" yusuf was also confused.

"i don't want to interfere in your college affairs. But, a time like this Ilyas should have already started to act. But, where is he ?. I didn't find it ?" tanya Nuge is like the tone that is ruled.

And it reminds me of him. Yes all this time that stands out is Ilyas who always helps me even though it is heavy. But last night we had a fight, didn't even acknowledge her kindness at all to me.

Haaa.

I told him cruel even though the Cruel person was actually me.

Looks like she won't come because I was mean to her last night.

Even though my mind was saying that, a man wore my favorite Cosplay Anime hat on my head. Namely, Mug*wara luffy hat. He came and said to me

"daijobu... (Just calm down). I came to help you one last time, maybe" said the man who turned out to be Ilyas.

Kiki's sister who saw ilyas like that, looked at him strangely and the others laughed at the pretentious Ilyas with his pirate Cosplay

“Si Wibu acutely caught up a whole day coming in with her alien language” Kak Kiki said mockingly.

“Whisper you Monyeet !!!” reply Ilyas scoffed

"I'll find him quickly. Besides, maybe I'm the only one who can find him. You all try to buy time with anything on stage. Yusuf, you can help me this time, right ?" Ilyas asked Joseph.

For this time Joseph was not as usual and just bowed his head and was silent.

"Just calm down, I just want you to look cool in front of your girlfriend anyway" Ilyas said, calming Joseph down.

He was so calm that I couldn't say a word. He looked at me and smiled at me

"that last night don't take seriously. We are friends, right ?. Keep shining like a bright light. Then I will be ready to be your Dark side that will become more and more concentrated" said Ilyas who calmed me.

Haaa.... I don't want to admit it.

I think I do love him.

But I can't accept his feelings anymore. I could only cry and shed tears at him

"help me... Ilyas.." I said to him.

And he walked away from me. While putting his Cosplay Pirate robe on me.

"of course." she replied briefly and left me.

Staring at his burdened and growing back was like I saw a back that had black-haired Crow Wings and was so dense. And able to carry ilyas flying through the sky.

Is that who you really are ilyas ?.