HIJRAHS
"LEA'S PAIN"

Why god? Why are you punishing me this way all the time!

Is it because I'm an illegitimate child? was I born out of an affair between my parents?

until you don't let me be with the people I love?

Until you robbed them in a way I never liked,

Is it still not enough? You took three people that I love and love me anyway, now you take Mbok Inah too?

If you don't like me, why did you make me born into the world?

Why don't you just make me die as a baby, or now it's okay!

Why do I live, if I always have to feel the loss of someone?

My body felt so limp, that I fell down and sat on the cold floor.My hands were still holding the arms of Mbok Inah.

"Mbok, didn't you say you would always accompany me? will it always be there for me? so why did Mbok choose to leave? are you tired of me? Or have I made a fatal mistake? you should say, let me change it. Don't be like this Mbok, don't go this way!.

I got up after a few minutes of sitting down, my legs felt very weak.

now I've been standing next to Inah's body.

"Mbok, I'm sorry.I'm sorry that I haven't been able to make it happy all this time" I said as I stroked the top of his head. .

"Mbok, so this is the path you chose?"

"It seems like mbok really miss the husband mbok huh? I know, Mbok is very long.until it is impatient to see you soon, Mbok, Mbok do not forget me yes, do not let after mbok meet and unite again with my husband mbok. Mbok lupain me! Keep on remembering me Yes mbok. storyain me to my husband mbok. keep on remembering me and often come to my dreams.if you can come every night in my dreams. that's an order, if you can come every night in my dreams, so Mbok can't refuse it.

Eits, Enough, I said enough! Mbok can no longer refute my words! this time let me do the talking and let me listen.

Mbok knows? early meet with mbok I already love the same mbok. keep fitting I know that mbok is toothless. I really want to pinch the cheeks mbok. mbok rich baby if laughing, I want to really pinch the cheeks mbok,

But, apparently the chatter and laughter this afternoon was the last one for me huh? Mbok left a little laugh for me to remember.

mbok also eat and snack a lot from my hands. I am very happy mbok. But honestly, I was sick, very sick.why not hold back the longing mbok on the husband just a few more years?

are you tired of accompanying me? But, I am not tired of living together with mbok. I still need mbok. I still want to mbok accompany me. I still really want mbok entertain. mbok angruri. I still want to see Mbok with me every day.

I don't know? can I live the day after this?

can I forget and get used to it without a mbok? Can I eat without being forced by the mbok again?

can I live my day without being by my side? But I also cannot impose my will.

I've scolded God, why would he let me leave? However, he is the one who determines everything.I can not do anything else mbok.if I can exchange everything I have. I will exchange it. But all of it is free and can't."

My tears kept spilling, my tears felt so much that I felt like there was no end to him flowing.

I wiped her face mbok Inah. I hugged her body. I kissed her forehead.

"Basal Naughty, mbok very Naughty. if you want to meet the husband it should be mbok diet, not eat a lot,". again I continue to lose my mind.

It feels heavy, very heavy. It was so heavy I took off Mbok Inah.

I loved him very much. However, she seems to have missed her husband very much.

I cannot force Mbok Inah to keep me company, because there is a husband who is always faithful waiting for him at the door of heaven.

I'm sure, surely in a moment Mbok met with Husband and Child just wayang Mbok Inah huh?

I'm here to pray.I hope Mbok is always happy.

Mbok must also pray for me Yes, so that I can often dream of Mbok in my Dreams.

After being late with grief. and neutralizing my emotions. I walked towards the sofa. I took the phone that was lying on the table. I pressed Sindi's number.

"Hallo Lea" he said in a typical sleep voice.

"Why is Lea? can I go home now?" heed

"Yes, Mbok Inah can come home with us brother" I replied.

"well, you go there now.Sister is ready to be ready first Lea" he said.

the phone call was eventually cut off. Yes, Sindi also must have not long arrived at the house.The equivalent of the graves of her parents was very far away.

A nurse came in and asked when the hospital could take care of Inah's body,

I explained, let me be satisfied with Mbok Inah first, and let Kak Sindi meet first with mbok Inah.

Karna, I don't know? when can I meet and see again mbok Inah.

I sat on the side of Inah's mbok. I rubbed his face and head repeatedly.I imagine our togetherness for several years, imagine our togetherness last afternoon.

up to 30 minutes arrived....

"Lea" said Sindi as she opened the door to the hospital room.

I looked in his direction.

"Loh, why is this sleeping? we have to go home tomorrow if Mbok Inah has slept, pity him" he said as he walked closer to us.

"Sister, Mbok Inah is not sleeping" I replied

"What do you mean?" he said with a very confused face.

"Mbok Inah is gone, she is going to see her husband and her son, she has left us" I replied trying to hold back the tears that were about to come out again.

Kak Sindi did not answer my words, she was silent a thousand languages. her body was like a stiff.she was still standing in her place.His eyes widened yet there was disbelief in her eyes.

Sindi walked closer to us, with very heavy steps Sindi continued to walk towards us.

"Mdude?"

"Mbok Inah, this is Sindi mbok"

"Mbok Inah's? wake up mbok, Sindi came to pick up mbok Inah home"

"Bok get up, let's go home Mbok"

sak Sindi continued to call and shake Mbok Inah's body, her cries began to spill, and she began to cry,

Yes, if I am this sick in staying away by Mbok Inah, let alone Sindi, who has lived for a long time and together with Mbok Inah.

brother Sindi hugged the body mbok Inah so tightly, I rubbed the back of Sindi's leg. trying to calm this woman, hoping she could be strong, although honestly I was still very sick.

20 Minutes of crying we spilled.....

until the Doctor suggested and asked permission for the body mbok Inah immediately taken care of and bathed.

sindi and I followed the advice and direction of the Doctor until 07.00 a.m.

mbok Inah's body is clean and already in the shroud. After being prayed by the hospital, we brought the body of Mbok Inah to the cemetery where the husband and son of nua in the tomb.

I've ordered my men to take care of Inah's funeral and they've informed the funeral is over.

09,00 am.......

Inah's mbok funeral has been completed, although repeatedly Sindi almost collapsed and fell unconscious, but she can still continue the funeral ceremony mbok Inah.

because in the complex where we live mostly Non-Muslims. finally I and Sindi decided to hold tahlil mbok Inah in the mosque around the area of Inah mbok house.

Enthusiastic citizens welcomed our plans so joyfully that I and Sindi felt relieved because we would not find rejection here.

...........