Love Me, Please
55. It Ends with This

Friends.

Yeah, friends.

For some people the word may mean nothing because they have too many names that fall into that category. But not for me.

Or, at least not the same thing for me now.

I still have Paulina, Marina, and Isobel as friends, close friends, but the more I come here the more I find that they don't really mean that. They're still my friends, but not my best friends anymore.

They don't understand me.

They don't know what's going on inside me and my life right now.

I .. I have no intention of telling them what a close friend should know about me. Or at least .. not yet. Later on, however, this feeling changed. However, I cannot see that this state of affairs will change anytime soon.

I still have Kayden. Even so, my feelings for her have now been tainted by the secrets I have between us. Secret after secret which, like a mine embedded in the ground and I know nothing about its location, could at any time destroy us if I stepped wrong. The secrets that ... already feel like betrayal itself.

I hate myself for ruining what Kayden and I have. Something that was once very sacred, very pure, very good, very beautiful, not spared the chaos and destruction that I brought with me. Now, there is no longer something holy, pure, good, and beautiful. All that remains is the debris.

Although Kayden was not aware of this situation.

Even though he was still covered by the bubble that had previously surrounded me, it protected us from reality and the outside world. However, I'm sure it won't be long before he'll also know that things aren't as they seem.

Friends.

Let's be friends.

Beckham and I.

Beckham's.

Beckham's different. He understood what I felt because he had also been living above this cruel world long before me. He had realized that there was nothing holy, pure, good, and beautiful on this earth. Everything was stained, full of wounds, full of ugliness, and full of ugliness. But he still survives. He can still survive. And he has proven that he can face the challenges that the world gives even come out as a winner.

I need that.

I need Beck's powers. I need Beck's eyes. I need Beck's guidance.

I need it all because I want to survive too. From the destruction that the world has brought upon me and from what I will destroy in the process.

I needed Beckham's strength and understanding when I finally had to break the last bond I had with my old world.

Sooner or later, I will definitely destroy the young man.

With all the burdens I carry. With all the evil that looms over me. In fact, I could destroy all the goodness that was within that young man with just my existence alone.

I will definitely destroy Kay, but at the same time I will also be able to save her from.

Friends.

Let's be friends.

Because that's what I need right now.

Welcome, my friend Beckham.

Goodbye, my love Kayden.

I will no longer need love in the future. I'm sure I won't be able to love anyone but you. Therefore, I give you all the good I have ever had for you because I believe it was all given to me by God to give it back to you.

Okay.

In this way, I've locked onto our future. I'm gonna take Beckham as my friend, and I'm gonna get Kayden out of my bad cage.

Friends.

Let's be friends.

I will not ask to be loved anymore because now I have nothing to love.

The friends? Yes.

Love's? No.

What's to love, huh?

Nothing.

The end's.