Moon
Heart Treatise

PoV Month

This morning I woke up with puffy eyes and a puffy face, my head still felt dizzy but not as light as yesterday. Although the body still feels weak and not powered but at least the feeling is still better.

After the dawn prayer I decided to lay down my body again, I must not be selfish. There's another creature now growing inside me, remembering yesterday's image on the USG machine feels like a dream. There is a creature as big as a bean growing and its existence in the world will depend on me very much its mother.

My stomach is still flat there is no lump like Afi, but my body used to be more contained than him. Is it because she's older than me in pregnancy? But if it's not wrong, Afi said he's 16 weeks, so it's natural that the baby bump has been seen.

But the most relieved reaction A Juno once knew I was pregnant, I thought that she would be unhappy but turned out to look excited. It was a shock too but I let him do everything he wanted to do in the hospital yesterday. Fetch, prepare a seat and try to make me comfortable. Either from the guilt of yesterday's fight or because I'm pregnant with her child or maybe both!.

Sleeping this morning feels so deep that when you wake up by Mama for breakfast it feels like being pulled from a well.

“Tehhh...teteh wake up.. let's have breakfast first”.

“Bulaaan... let's get up” faintly heard the voice of Mama.

“Typically he never woke up noon” a voice I was very familiar with.

“Teh... let's wake up” Mama Nisa's voice I finally heard clear to open my eyes.

“Arghhh sorry.. was sleeping again after dawn” I rushed to try to sit but the head immediately felt dizzy.

“Aduh still dizzy Mah..” lamented me while holding his head.

“Do not force breakfast in the dining room.. in the room only Ma” turns out A Juno is here again.

“Iya... breakfast in room aja”.

“Do you have breakfast the same month? Mama makes fried rice and fried crispy squid Afi's favorite.. Want month too?” ask Mama excitedly.

“What aja Ma... my body is still lemes because” leaned the body on a pile of pillows that have been arranged behind the back.

Mama rushed out

“I made a table for breakfast in bed” A Juno's voice rang out at the end of the bed, then there was movement in the bed. Apparently he was sitting there.

“You what color?”

“Past made folding table modeling that can be used for various purposes”

“Can be used to store food for breakfast in bed, can be used to work as laptop holder or table to write”

I let him babble, still no desire and passion to respond to him. It turns out that when we are sick the energy feels very limited.

“His stomach still hurts?” I could hear the worry in his voice. Actually, my stomach is no problem unless it moves suddenly will feel pain. That's why I chose to carefully move at this moment.

“You want me to bring rubbing oil?” It felt like he heard all the stupid questions he said. If you think logically do not have to ask a lot just do what is considered necessary. Where any sick person would like to answer a question, rather than be dizzy hearing all his talk I decided to just lie back behind him.

“Do not sleep again.. You have not eaten later added limp” his voice sounded full of worry. Stupid time but now I just want to think about myself. Finally he just sat there quietly, but I could feel that he was looking at me at the end of the bed.

“I'm sorry Moon.. I know indeed I'm stupid to be selfish” back apologies that are always expressed as before. Last night I thought why it was so hard to forgive the present mistake, why this outburst of anger seemed as if it could not be withheld as it used to be.

If you listen to Mama's story about the reason A Juno asked for her deposit money because of our quarrel yesterday, it seems that she was trying to correct the mistake but that's not my wish. I don't care about the money invested in the company.

I feel that this anger is more about being disappointed in his attitude. His abiding attitude towards the effort I put in, both materially and immaterially. Coupled with the feeling of anger because he was still in contact with the woman. What is the great Kak Inne and why the woman can not forget Kak Juno and undergo his marriage with Mr. Kevin. Didn't he already have a complete family, a well-earned husband, a smart and beautiful child and a great job at the Bank. Why always look for the happiness of the man he left behind.

How long will she always be present in this marriage?

Mama's presence decided the silence in the room.

“Kak... You have breakfast there! Let's have breakfast first quietly” apparently Mama understands that I am reluctant to move if Kak Juno is still in the room.

“Iya” apparently he now understands and does not argue much. As soon as the door closed, Mama laughed.

“Hahaha. So complacent fear of being scolded, Mama continued to be forbidden to meet you”

I tried to get up and sit on the bed, the head still felt heavy.

“Here was the hardest to manage”

“The face is similar to Mama but its nature.. Plek ketiplek same Father”

“Hard head and want to win by yourself”

“Sit alone dear... lean into the pillow.. well so”.

“Sorry so troublesome Mama” turns Mama brought a large tray of fried rice and crispy fried squid that was told earlier. There is fruit juice and also a piece of red cake and a sprinkling of nuts on the edge.

‘Waaah red velvet” my eyes instantly round looking at it.

“Hahahaha Mama more sure if the baby is in your stomach it will be similar to his father..Favorite sama” Mama look happy to see me who will immediately take a piece of cake that looks beautiful. Hearing Mama's words, my hand immediately stopped and thought that A Juno did not like sweet food.

“Not that A Juno does not like sweet foods?” many wonder.

“She likes cake that has her cream cheese, let alone red velvet that there is a sprinkling of beans”

“Carrot cheese cake with peanut butter she likes also”

Hearing his name alone my mouth immediately drooled.

“Iya this child will look like his father.nger name aja Moon directly want” said me while imagining orange-colored cake and a layer of cheese in the middle.

“Hahahahah.. New can later cover the same sweet food”

“Your weight should go back to normal to be healthy Mama and her baby”

Finally I kept a small plate filled with pieces of cake and then grabbed a plate of fried rice, the fragrance of which already made me feel hungry.

“Sorry if it becomes troublesome, tomorrow God willing can move”

“Gak yawning continues also” big mouthfuls of fried rice go directly into the mouth. Thank goodness it doesn't feel nauseous at all.

“Have taken medicine from doctor?” My mom knew there was medicine to take before eating.

“Already Ma.. earlier so finished the morning prayer, teteh eat” Mama seemed to nod with satisfaction.

“Today Month break permit in room yaa Ma.. sorry can not help Mama at home” advice for bed rest I will follow until the body feels recovered.

“Ya doctor asks for a full rest.. don't mind”.

“Eat ya.. Spent, later the same old aunt ate it taken”

“Juno will prohibit Mama from bothering Teteh so don't worry”

It turned out that what Mama said was true, until the night A Juno never looked back into the room. Give me a chance to catch my breath and think about our relationship.

The next day my body began to feel energized, like there was energy to run. But of course it is impossible for me to do, now I have to start walking more calmly and rhythmically not to surprise the little creatures in the stomach.

But still somehow because it was used to hearing his voice every day, it felt like something was missing when he did not see A Juno, but why if he met instead felt annoyed and felt like he wanted to get angry. A confusing feeling!.

After breakfast, try walking to the front porch and see the garden arranged by Mama look beautiful, beautiful, there was a bench in the park near the pool sunbathing for a while and again felt sleepy until I finally decided to sleep again. These two days all I did was eat and sleep like I was unemployed. Maybe this is a holiday gift to sleep after weeks of sleep just a few hours each night.

Cedrik said that the results of the review of the proposal documents will be announced in the next few days, after being announced later that passed the selection must be presented in front of invited investors. They will later decide to conduct a follow-up interview if our company is considered worthy of funding. It turns out the journey is still long, fortunately first while working at KAP I never complicate companies that need investment funds. Maybe that's why, when I'm in the position of all of them, I can do everything and go well.

Problems are always there, just how we react to them. If seen as a barrier it will definitely feel difficult, such as when it comes to translating documents and videos into English. But in the end I saw this as a challenge, learning to translate formal documents by looking at examples on the internet. Then re-edit all videos by entering English subtitles. In the end I became master of video editing applications and of course felt satisfied because I made it myself. Even if later I do not get funded at least I have mastered new skills. But still there is a price to be paid it turns out. lack of sleep, fatigue and eventually become sick.

It suddenly occurred to me whether the anger that was not controlled yesterday because I was exhausted and lack of sleep so it was difficult to control myself not to return his anger. It could be one of the factors causing the big fight yesterday. It means that in the future I must be able to manage more time at work, lack of sleep and too tired to make the brain sanity becomes low.

When waking up before dzuhur the head becomes lighter. It feels like life feels happier, if it is likened to how I feel today like a child walking home with Mom and Dad and bought a doll toy. It turned out that happiness was simple, and that happiness increased as I glanced at the small table next to the bed there was a large piece of orange cake covered with large peanuts. Next to it appears a large mug of brownish-white drink.

“What is this?” the mug still feels warm.

“Woaaah tugil” tea has been a long time since I drank it. It feels so good to be warm in the stomach. Almost half a cup I spent straight away, so remember Afi's talk that I drank hot coffee and immediately half out.

“Waaah has woken Mama”'s son

“Newly want to wake.. so good it was sleep”.

“Tadi Juno here.. bring me Carrot Cake” teteh I looked at Mama confused, so that means A Juno had entered the room while I was sleeping.

“Iya earlier Juno made you tea pull because he said yesterday Moon would not like to drink plain” milk

“She said that Teteh likes to drink tea the most, so she made tea pull.

“Later Juno will buy strawberry-flavored pregnant milk or chocolate. He asked her what Moon's favorite taste was? Mama said yes don't know.. Who must know her husband.. uh she even bengong hahahahha”.

Mama looked happy, I became embarrassed myself because I just woke up after a day of just eating and sunbathing.

“Month already looks fresher now”

“Mama is happy to see it, do not be too burdened by work. Just let Juno who learned take full responsibility”

“So Mama has advised him to think about the next step”

“Learn to make a wise decision.. because he is now the head of the family, already has a wife, and soon has children”.

“Don't like to impulsively buy something just because of his sheer desire”

“Must be well thought out and bad how forward”

“When mom asked about the deposit disbursement plan she said no so she said”

I was immediately surprised, does that mean he will still take a car that he will buy from his friend, the head immediately felt dizzy again.

“A Juno want to install a car from the deposit interest it Ma… if disbursed later we can not pay the installments because the income from the project is still absorbed for the cost of making the interior in the workshop” Mama Nisa nodded her understanding. This problem cannot be solved easily. But I no longer care, now the priority is the baby in the womb, lest I have to take medication continuously. Although doctors say that the drug is safe for pregnant women to consume, the chemicals must be minimized during pregnancy.

The more days the condition improved, the next day, I was able to wake up and move normally. After dawn prayers can go directly to the kitchen to help Auntie to prepare breakfast. Afi was ready at the dining table with Nico both of them were well dressed to leave for the office. Ahhhh. It was like we were going to fight with the world.

“Woaaah can already cook againii.. aseeek already can be invited to the Mall dong” comments Afi always different.

“NOT ALLOWED TO GO OUT OF THE HOUSE FOR A WEEK” Mama immediately replied firmly, Afi just melengos with annoyance. Take a full plate of fried rice complete with eggs and sliced vegetables.

“Afiii.. plate Nico filled first new you fill got kamu” Mama shook her head dizzy seeing the behavior of her daughter.

“Hehe lupaa.. anyways you ihh so habit taken food with me.. first before marriage you take it yourself… what a hard thing is to take yourself” Afi while glaring annoyed while filling Nico's plate with rice and eggs. Nico simply smiled as he moved his eyebrows upwards.

“When again I serve you. mumpung there Mama” he said while smiling seductively, with a frowning face Afi prepared everything. Seeing Afi and Nico is like a schoolboy living together, no burden and enjoying life.

“Assalamualaikum” voice on the door surprised me.. A Juno.

“Cieee who want to ride breakfast want to eat fried rice made by wife niiiyyy”

“What time is Kak from Ruko?… end of dawn prayer must immediately unplug here”

“Same customers wife or want to eat for free?”

“Much of your talk.. if pregnant a lot of najai not talking unclear” ketokan in the head Afi immediately make him grimace and scream.

“Maaaamaa.. Sister hit meuu head..sakiiiit iniiih” turned out to be a boisterous talent brother and sister will not stop even though they are married. He sat down at the table and said nothing.

I took the plate and filled it with rice and eggs complete with vegetables and kept it in front of him.

“Makasih” said short, I did not answer and immediately turned back to the kitchen.

“Hihihi…. How good is not salted? Sick but not bloody wkwkkwkwkwkw” I can hear the sound of Afi laughing complacently.

“Afi already do not talk.. eat right.. later on” Nico's voice sounds firm, and then no longer heard the conversation at the table.

“Month why not eat?” Mom goes to the kitchen.

“Magi cutongin fruit first for Afi in the office. she likes snacking... she said yesterday rose weight mostly afraid the baby is too big”.

“If snacking fruit so healthier” I prepared two large containers of pieces of fruit to take Afi to the office.

“You even thought of Afi.. let's eat first”.

“So I've been drinking milk with biscuits Ma... soon I go to the breakfast table” actually I look for an excuse so as not to have a table with A Juno still feel awkward and uncomfortable.

As expected Afi immediately welcomed the provisions I made, endless kisses and hugs that made us almost fall until finally able to be released after being scolded by Mama. One of the best things that happened in my life was having a sister like her.

A Juno did not appear at the dinner table, either she had finished her breakfast because I did not see her plate at the table so that I could have a quiet breakfast. And after cleaning the table, I went back to the room. It turns out he wasn't there either. Thank goodness I don't have to be so stale. This morning I wanted to learn how to organize the garden with Mama so I rushed straight to the park in front. Cigarette smoke immediately smelled when I reached the terrace. Here he is apparently with a laptop, coffee and cigarettes in his hands.

He immediately panicked as I stared at his hand that was holding a cigarette.

“I forgot... I forgot that again pregnant do not get smoked” she immediately turned off and stood wagging the smoke that was nearby, but I did not care. Go straight to the park and then approach Mama who is busy watering plants.

Almost two hours we were in the park, not felt until sweating and the air started to heat up.

“Month don't be too tired.. tomorrow we continue to move the flower pot” Mama asked me to stop working.

I nodded weakly, apparently physical activity for two hours immediately drained a lot of energy. When I returned to the house A Juno was not seen on the terrace, so excited to help Mama I did not realize that she was gone.

Bathing and then performing the Dhuha prayer calmly became a pleasure that I could enjoy when not working in the office. Teaching became an activity that I noticed more during pregnancy, all the anxiety was reduced when reciting the holy verse of the Quran. The calmness felt by my mother I was sure would be felt also by the fetus in my stomach.

When I finished reading the Quran, I realized that there was someone sitting on the bedside and looking at me.

“I'm glad you are now healthier, even though you can move but don't be too tired”

“This I bought blueberry waffle I love topping ice cream” she smiled proudly while pointing at the cake with melted ice cream on it.

“Mama said that her baby taste is the same as mine. So I started eating the food I wanted to eat”.

“You must like.. quickly eat now ice cream later melted” he thrust a plate containing cake, I reluctantly take it and sit on the sofa a little far from the bed. Still lazy to feel close to him, just seeing him makes my head immediately feel dizzy again.

It turns out that the waffle is really delicious. Blueberry circles still taste sour and sweet mouth combined with sweet ice cream makes it a fitting alloy.

“Nak right?” he said excitedly, I just replied with a slight nod still lazy to look at him, because every time he saw his face felt like there was a painful feeling of a knife cut in the chest.

“Teh Pull it drunk still warm, do not forget if you have been drinking ice cream you must drink something warm. I still remember what Mama said when I ate ice cream” she kept the tea tug on the desk next to the couch. I immediately looked away as he crouched down in front of the sofa.

“Beginning... I'm sorry.. I promise I want to change better” always just promise to change for better but until yesterday our quarrel, his effort was done only when he said the promise. Suddenly the emotional feeling returned, the feeling of sadness and want to cry. I immediately stored the plate containing the waffle and moved to the bed. He just kept quiet watching me leave.

“I'm dizzy.. Want to sleep” hope with that saying he wants to get out of the room and leave me alone, I'm afraid the longer he is in the room, the more sad feeling makes me want to cry.

“Iyaa.. you break”.

“Hmmm..

“I just want to say that my plan to buy a car has been canceled”

“So in the future if there is something we will buy.. we will discuss together whatever it is”.

“You rest first yaa.. “.

“Remember not to be too tired. if there is something you want to eat and buy say Mama and Afi”.

“Tomorrow I have to go to Surabaya. not long just two days”.

“There are clients who used to like me to work on the project ask to meet for the next project”

“Dear yourself well as long as I go”

Feeling the movement of his body as he got closer to the side of the bed, and suddenly just his hand rubbed my head and kissed my hair long ago, his breathing felt heavy and deep, my tears instantly pooled. I can't cry. Don't cry the Moon…. It would only make her feel heavy and then stay in the room longer and I still needed time to better control my emotions, so that I could talk to A Juno without tears.