Blue Light
FIFTEEN

Luke stared at the pale-coloured hospital ceiling with empty eyes.

The doctor was busy examining her, asking her a few things about how she felt.

Luke answered soberly, because his brain was busy thinking about something else. He wants the doctor to finish his job as soon as possible, so he can talk to Neff.

Neff was standing leaning not far from the bed.

His face was grim, and Luke didn't like it. Neff rarely had a grim face unless something very serious bothered him.

"Your situation is almost normal, but we still need to make further observations. If it stays like this, you can go home tomorrow" Dr. Keller said, removing the stethoscope from her ear.

"Good, I can't wait! Thank you, Doctor" said Luke, a little in a hurry, implying a subtle swipe for him.

Doctor Keller smiled understandingly, after giving a polite nod to Neff, he walked out of Luke's room.

"Where's Lana?" Luke asked the first thing that revolved around him earlier, while adjusting the height of his bed so that the position of his head could be more upright, with the remote that is next to the bed.

Neff immediately complained to hear it, it was the question he most did not want to answer.

"Go! I can't find him. He's been out of Grindelwald somehow"

Luke clenched his hands, holding back the frustration in the chest.

She lost consciousness for two days according to the doctor, so Lana could be anywhere right now. It's too late to trace his tracks now.

"Lana's a very experienced escape, you've seen how many cities she's lived in. And now, the difficulty of tracking him is growing, because I can't find any trace of him from the bank records anymore. Since moving to Switzerland, he got an account with maximum security. The bank refused to provide a record of Lana's transactions, if I didn't bring a warrant from the judge. An impossible letter I got, because Lana didn't commit any crime. And this, is Lana's phone she left next to you."

Neff thrusting Lana's phone at Luke, she spewed out all the frustration she had felt these past two days in her search for answers to Lana's whereabouts.

"He didn't do anything to you, did he? When the doctor said that you were exactly like Petra, I began to doubt Lana's innocence. Did he do anything that made you sick?" neff asked, suddenly doubting Lana's innocence.

"I who make sense, will answer no. But I, who is going crazy, will answer yes" Lukas replied after thinking for a few moments carefully.

"What kind of answer is that?" snapped Neff.

Starting to get angry because he still got another nonsensical answer, after two days waiting for Luke to come to his senses.

"Because I saw Neff, the dim blue light that Petra said in court, I saw it too. He wasn't lying or pretending to be crazy" Lukas said, looking at Neff closely, to assert his seriousness.

Neff immediately cursed while throwing the body on the chair next to Luke's bed.

If it wasn't Luke speaking, Neff would have unhesitatingly assumed it was a sign of a psychiatric illness.

But Lukas was not crazy, he had seen Luke in a state of a bit of madness, but his condition was now very sane.

"He named Ellza, and also Barnabas"

Neff immediately raised his head in shock at hearing that.

"Whatchu mean? What exactly happened?!!"

Luke could see the panic raiding Neff, what they would discuss after this would strike at the core of every science Neff had learned a few years back. Neff's nervous attitude hints at the picture of what a guess is what Luke will discuss.

Luke recounts the events of the afternoon in full and detail, until the moment he lost consciousness, when the dim blue light emanating from Lana's body, the, makes his internal organs feel like they are doused in liquid nitrogen and makes him short of breath.

"Before I lost consciousness, I clearly heard Lana pleading with someone by the name of Barnabas to help me" Luke said, closing the long story.

The longer Lukas heard the story, Neff's sitting position deteriorated. Because what he heard was very contrary to his common sense.

First, where did Lana know about Ellza and Barnabas?

Second, they both died. Ellza died four years ago, and his grandfather Barnabas, died two years later. Lana couldn't possibly ask him for help.

"Maybe Joan told Lana everything that happened to you. And he called the name unintentionally out of panic" Neff said, trying to make a more plausible assumption.

Luke grabbed his phone at the table next to the bed and pressed Joan's number.

"Luke? You're aware apparently. How are you doing? And where's Lana?"

As usual, Joan would stuff him with questions, before he could catch his breath.

"I'm fine, Joan. And I don't know where Lana is" Lukas replied, trying to be patient.

"What happened to you two at the festival? What does Lana's departure have to do with you being sick?"

"I can't tell you anything because I don't understand why he left either. Please stop talking, I have to ask about something" Luke said, eventually pleading with annoyance, as Joan continued to babble.

"Have you ever told Lana about Ellza?" ask Luke while biting his lips.

Mentioning the name Diell always made his heart beat painfully.

"Why would I tell such a sad thing to Lana? He was already grim enough without needing to hear a sad story. And why are you asking such a thing?" joan asked, filled with astonishment.

"Have you ever told him about grandma? Or at least say her name in front of Lana?" luke asked, not ignoring Joan's question.

"No! I didn't tell him anything about the house, what for? Lana lives alone in the house, but she can run away in fear if she knows there were two people who died in the house before. What else is this??!"

Joan began to sound impatient, because she thought Luke was asking useless questions.

Reasonable answer, "All right, thank you"

Luke immediately disconnects the call and turns off his phone. Joan will definitely call him again, at this time he does not want to answer any questions.

"You're wrong! Joan never told Lana anything. He lied to me when he told me he knew about Aubrey from Joan. Earlier, she had clearly referred to me as Aubrey's granddaughter. I should have asked further back then "sorry.

"This is crazy Luke!! Crazy and unreasonable"

Neff had said that many times but kept repeating it.

"Crazy and absurd, but explains all of Lana's strangeness"

Luke continued Neff's sentence in a quieter voice. All the magical things Lana did suddenly made sense.

"Don't!! Don't go ahead, because it's impossible" Neff snapped.

Luke actually also does not like the direction of the conclusion they will take. But that's the only logical answer that explains Lana's behavior.

Luke had already formed that conclusion, one second after Lana shouted the name Barnabas.

Although he is difficult to admit the truth. That conclusion is absurd. And hearing Neff's desperate tone, Luke knew, he was thinking the same thing about her.

"A few days before the festival, I met Lana. He looked very troubled because he had to bring a box of potatoes and a bag of apples. I helped him get the potato box to Erich's truck. At first we walked together as usual, but Lana started getting weird when the route we took passed through the clock tower. Staunchly, he refused to go down that road, even though Erich's truck was parked near Melina.  Lana chose to go the further way. We ended up turning around avoiding the clock tower. When I asked him why, he just said that he didn't want to pass in front of the clock tower"

"And you told me about it because?" Luke doesn't understand Neff's story.

"You remember when Lana insisted on sleeping in your room at Merian?"

Luke nodded, of course he remembered.

"The attitude was exactly the same as back then. I think he avoided both places for the same reason" Neff said reluctantly, as he would have touched on a very sensitive matter.

"I don't understand Neff, speak more clearly" Luke urged impatiently.

"I knew this by accident. The day before the festival began I had to complete an elaborate report on the level of crime and accidents that occurred in Grindelwald, because the government wanted to confirm Grindelwald as the safest place on earth according to Guinness World Record. For that, I had to dig up the records from a hundred years before"

Luke was actually impatient because Neff's story widened in an uncertain direction. But he held his tongue.

"I was very surprised when I found the data, that before, there had been a suicide in the clock tower. About 45 years ago. A young man jumped from there and was instantly killed hitting the ground with a broken body."

Neff raised his hand preventing Luke from speaking, as he had not finished explaining.

"I know it's terrible. And it could have been just a coincidence, but I've been researching from all angles to look for similarities between the two places, and this is all I've managed to find. But of course, at that moment I laughed at this fact. And I was hoping you'd say this was just a coincidence"

Unfortunately, Neff's hopes are shattered, as Luke looks to think about his words seriously.

"I also suspected that someone might have told Lana about Anja, and also about the poor young man. But in this world, there were only three people who knew, about what had actually happened to Anja in that room. And I'm sure none of us, who would sanely tell Lana about it, and I bet with all the wealth I have, that Darla doesn't either"

Luke covered his face with a hand, for Neff's explanation sounded terrible, but it again sounded very reasonable if it were true.

Neff's face immediately wrinkled dislike.

He is upset that Luke thinks he can find something he missed. He himself had already checked the records dozens of times. And also, because it means he has to break one of the most basic rules of psychiatry about sharing patient info with others.

"I left it at the office. But I've almost memorized all the contents" Neff said lazily.

But then he sat back down to explain.

"Lana received treatment from a psychiatrist for the first time when she was thirteen. It says Lana suffered from acute hallucinations that left her unable to sleep for days. Doctors quickly diagnosed her as schizophrenic due to shock from her sister's death a few weeks earlier".

"But they forgot one thing, Lana was too rational. He was very conscious when he was hallucinating. Schizophrenia sufferers usually can no longer distinguish which is the real world and which are hallucinations. While on that note, with details explained, Lana saw the figure of people who should not exist. Lana definitely called herself hallucinating. I've never heard of anything like this, and I'm sure the doctors haven't, they shouldn't have decided as soon as it's the kind of treatment Lana's going to do"

Neff shook his head sympathetically, imagining Lana's suffering back then.

"Schizophrenia drugs have slightly terrible side effects, including convulsions, tremors, uncontrolled muscle movements, to acute anxiety. It doesn't matter if the patient needs it, but Lana doesn't. He took such drugs for months, without showing any significant development. Afterwards, her parents decide to put Lana in a mental hospital, in the hope that she will get more intensive care"

"But the decision seems to backfire, the file calls Lana's hallucinations increasingly so while in a mental hospital. Lana looks normal during the day, but as the sun begins to set, Lana screams hysterically and refuses to be there. Lana will just be quiet, when the doctor injects her with sleeping pills. If the effects of the drug run out before sunrise, it is certain that Lana will return hysterical. The doctor eventually went to extreme lengths and drugged her every day until sunrise"

Luke squeezed the blanket very tightly. His face heated up, and his vision became blurry. His chest was filled with a rumble of sympathy and anger. Imagining Lana tied up in a hospital bed and having to experience all that, crushes her heart.

The memory of how Lana looked so sad, while crying while hugging her knees at Merian, further twisted Luke's heart. And Lana has to experience it every day, without being able to avoid it.

"How could they do that? It was inhumane" Luke rubbed his face to hide the sadness.

"I almost vomited when I read it. But maybe they think it's the best" Neff said, patting Luke's hand gently.

"But it all just ends. Suddenly one morning Lana calmed down. He is still easily surprised, and sometimes does things he shouldn't. But he's normal, especially after asking for something you're familiar with, which is that he wants to change rooms"

"Are you investigating what happened in that room?"

"I tried. After you passed out under the exact same conditions as Petra, I ran out of ideas to draw conclusions, and tried to find answers from the most unlikely angles. But that place is a mental hospital. The records of patients who died by suicide could easily beat the thickness of Lana's medical records"

"It's awful!! What kind of horror does Lana see every day?" Luke involuntarily rubbed both of his arms as the fur on his back stood up.

"Mmmm--- do we agree to admit----'that thing'?" Neff frantically paced around the foot of the bed.

He was a good psychiatrist, and also a cop who used to deduce things based on evidence and facts.

And this time Neff felt betrayed, because of the evidence and facts, it led him to conclusions that are beyond human reason. Neff had trouble admitting it, of course,

Luke is the same, but he is the one who witnesses how Lana changes drastically at sunset. He knows how Lana suffers from it all. And he faced it alone. How can Lana be alone if her parents are still alive?

"What happened after Lana was declared better?" luke asked, wanting to hear the story.

"Once Lana showed no signs of still seeing hallucinations. Doctor returned. For about 3 months he lived with his parents. But then, the doctor received a call from his mother saying that Lana's illness was relapsing. The doctor of course immediately suggested that Lana be taken to the hospital again. But another misfortune befalls Lana, her mother dies of a heart attack the next day, before she can take Lana there. Kem--"

"WAIT!! You said heart attack? Is this also a heart attack as we know it? Like me and Petra?" Luke widened his eyes in shock.

Neff patted her knees hard "Aghhh... I'm so stupid!! Why don't I think in that direction?!!" curse him with annoyance.

Neff pulled out his phone and called someone.

"Weber, I need you to look up someone's death records, he's from New York. I'll send her details through a message. And I want a very detailed report. If he dies of illness, you should know exactly what his symptoms are. If you need to call the doctor who treated you, give a reasonable reason. Understood?!"

Weber is one of Neff's trustees.

"You don't need to know what it is for! Do it as usual" Neff said a little loudly, then disconnected the call.

"Have you just abused your power?" lukas.

"Yes, and I'll repeat if necessary. Lana is case-unique, I have to maximize all the resources I have. You mind?" Neff sounded annoyed.

"No, you can abuse your power even more by asking for a warrant from the judge" Luke urged.

"What you're asking for is not an abuse of power, but a miracle. The judge will ask for a continuation of the case later. Do you want to turn Lana into a fugitive? Of course with that status, he could be easier to find. But the police who arrested him will definitely put him in jail before we come. Can you make Lana spend her nights in jail? Haaa..?"

Neff seems to have reached the limit of the stress that can be borne. She's upset.

Luke very rarely sees Neff angry, but Lana's 'special' state, pressing her anger button on the vulnerable spot.

Luke finally nodded. Finding Lana faster sounds tantalizing, but if it means Lana has to spend the night in jail, Luke better wait.

"Why did he choose to leave?" luke asked, not to anyone, because only Lana could answer him.

"What choice does he have? He must have gotten tired of hearing others accuse him of being crazy, or maybe even tried to put him back in a mental institution. He runs away to avoid it all" Neff tries to guess the answer by considering Lana's nature.

"Is that why he tries to avoid interaction with others? So that no one would think him crazy?"

"Maybe, and it's very sad. He had to live in solitude for many years. And I couldn't be more amazed because Lana can still maintain her sanity after all that. Humans are creatures that need social relationships. It takes determination and a heart as strong as steel to break your relationship with humans"

Neff wants to applaud Lana now.

"Or maybe he compensated for that need by relating to beings other than humans" Luke finally uttered.

"F!! No need to say it out loud" Neff immediately cursed.

He knew the conclusion they had drawn was near perfect, but he felt the knowledge he had learned to be trash if he admitted it.

"There---can-see-and-communicate-with-spirit-human-that-already-died!"

Luke says one by one slowly and clearly. In addition to teaching Neff a lesson for swearing at him, also to get himself used to it.

The truth about Lana is strange and absurd.

But Lana is Lana, and she's gonna bring her back. Lukaa would not let Lana live such a horrible life alone.

Luke wants to tell Lana that he will never think of her as crazy.

And that he loved her too.

-----------0O0---------------------------------0O0-------------------------------------------0-

Lana brushed off the pile of snow on the black boots she was wearing. The pile of snow on the road leading to his residence was very thick.

But Lana didn't have time to clean it up. His new job left only free time to sleep.

Today, in addition to working at a small restaurant like before, Lana also takes a part-time job at a museum as a janitor.

The restaurant is only open in the afternoon until evening. Her salary will not be enough to save, so Lana decides to find additional work.

With those two jobs, Lana can calmly save her income from the restaurant after deducting the rent.

He used his salary from part-time work to eat. Even sometimes it can also be in addition to paying the rent, if he can survive eating bread without cheese.

But after living in Grindelwald, Lana's saliva always rises uncontrollably at the sight of cheese. He sometimes buys it if he wants to please you.

His body weight also began to shrink drastically, once he left Grindelwald two months ago. Her cheeks were back sunken, and some of her clothes became very loose, and some of her,

But Lana didn't mind, it didn't matter how she looked, nobody paid attention.

This time Lana made sure not to talk if it wasn't very important. Lana only works without greeting anyone, and also does not respond to anyone's greetings.

And again with those two jobs, he made sure his body was very tired when he got home. Lana needs it to reduce nightmares. Diell, Aubrey and Luke almost every night appear in his dreams.

With a tired body, Lana also did not have time to think about her longing for the torturous Luke.

Working hard is Lana's answer to reduce her suffering.