Nyctophile
Stuffy
Four months passed, after all I went through with disappointment, stress, fatigue, fatigue, until I felt like I wanted to give up.
I resigned from management, I was out of modeling and the like, although many things I did before resigning, make up brands asked for a month for their new catalog, meanwhile, the fashion show exhibition in Malaysia had to keep going with me as a fashion show, not to mention the health of my mother that did not escape my attention, bang Fahri could not return as quickly as he expected.
Inevitably, Ares was often asked for help by the father, he often came to the apartment, yes I brought my parents to Jakarta, Jakarta, the first reason is because I can not go back and forth Jakarta Surabaya every day, I also can not monitor the mother from afar, the reason why Ares? because it turns out, Ares is domiciled in Jakarta, the incident in Surabaya because Ares there is a working visit there.
Another thing I didn't know about Ares was that he had a house in an elite area near my apartment, Ares was an architect at a company he had managed for several years, I deserve to say Ares is wrong.
Some of the messages on my phone have popped up, the last one was a phone call from my mom, who told me to go home and meet Ares' parents who came to visit to discuss the marriage between me and their son.
When I arrived at the apartment, the black BMW X7 greeted me, I knew who had come, the same car parked in Ares' garage three years ago in Surabaya.
My breath feels heavy, God help me.
Arriving at the door of the apartment, I opened the door with a barcode that was indeed applied to my phone.
Ccleks...
The door opened, and all eyes stared at me.
"Assalamualaikum." Greet me in a cold tone I say no other than greetings.
"Sir, Mom has Asar, Za prayed first" I said and passed to my room.
After the prayer I still did not want to get out of the room, my sense of tightness still continued, even though at the time of the application event I could wear a mask, and cover it from everyone.
I decided to join everyone, until the time of my future mother-in-law, oh yes, can I call her future in-law? I don't know if I'm still not sure.
"Zana, how do you like this dress or want this one." asked the future mother-in-law
"What do you think is best." I replied briefly with a smile.
"Za, it's your marriage, once in a lifetime, you have to decide." Mom looked at me, I know what you mean Mom, but I can't pretend much more.
"Right said your mother Za, let's please whichever one you think is good, Aisyah was so enthusiastic when preparing for her wedding, then why are you like this Za, you must be hesitant." my future mother-in-law said the ultimate words that made this heart ache.
Telak, the name of Aisha again, although the story is like that, but I am the one who feels the most guilty here, Aisyah is widowed because of me, because of this man's actions, yes the man who is in front of me, Aisha is widowed because of me, who will take me.
"Za did not hesitate, it's just, this wedding connects two families, Za also wants father and mother, Aunt and family can participate, besides no need for fancy dresses, no need for luxury dresses, this marriage is only attended by family." I replied.
"Well if it's what you want, son, you can't force it" he said.
It sounded bitter as she called out my mother's name, while I called her Aunt, like a bang in my chest, tight.
"This white dress is nice and simple, how is Za? I love this one." said my mother.
"Yes Za, it's good to say yes, mama likes it too." said my mother-in-law.
It was that long and simple yet elegant white dress that finally captivated the eyes of the two women, and I just nodded.
In two weeks this marriage will be in motion, all these needs and it is taken care of by my mother and in-laws, even though the mother with the limitations because now has to be in a wheelchair, she said, but he was no less excited than his irony candidate, sometimes I like to smile seeing the two middle-aged women were enthusiastic.
Finished the magrib prayer in imami my future papah-in-law, we had dinner, I could only shut up and stare at my food lazily, my appetite was gone somewhere, my appetite was gone, as I stared at everything, my fear suddenly surfaced, the footage of the incident in the night flashed again, the grip of his hands so rough pulled me, his disgusting touch to my lips, everything was still going through my head, until the moment I met his eyes, my spoon fell and I wanted to vomit.
"uek. uek.." I couldn't stand it, I could just stand up and run to the bathroom, when I was done, I could just stand up, I apologized and asked to go in first to end all the conversation in the dining room.
Forgive me, O God, too painful and disgusting, can I live all this, live with him devoting my whole life to him, O Allah, I would rather be confined in the dark for life than this, give the servant a way out, O Allah, if it is Ares then let go of this excess hatred on him.