Nyctophile
Punishment

Dodging, that's what Zaya did two years after that night, running away as if she wanted to drown herself, but her presence in one of the Muslim fashion magazines and some advertising posters, made me know where Zaya was.

It's too easy to find out that Zaya is now, I can go to her and apologize, but if I do, Zaya will get hurt more, I know his look of disgust if a man touches his hand, I know his eyes when he looks at the opposite sex, and his tears that fell when a man left the hospital a few months ago, making me realize, Zaya won't accept me.

For me hiding to enjoy her smile is the only thing I can do, every time I shoot I always stay near Zaya without anyone knowing, I always looked at her smile and her natural face.

Not wanting to drown in the guilt that increasingly shackles it until it feels almost like dying, one year ago, I ventured to come to meet the father and mother of Zaya, Zaya, I want to tell you all about getting sorry for whatever the consequences are, all I'm going to live with as long as I'm sorry I can.

"Sir, ma'am, I came here to apologize." I said guiltily, they were all confused, zaya's older brother named Fahri was also confused and looked at me dislike.

"What's wrong with Ares, why apologize" said Mr. Rudi, as Zaya's parents.

I knelt before Zaya's parents, I swore tears I couldn't stand.

"My divorce and Aisyah's are related to Zaya's sudden departure."

"Hem? hows it? my sister left because she got a job in Jakarta, not because of you guys, what's wrong with you? you're nobody to my sister." said bang Fahri.

"Sir, Ma'am, I've already desecrated Zaya." All eyes were on my confession, they were all full of questions and fury.

"What do you say?" bang Fahri again.

"Don't listen to my confession until it's over, because I can't keep it all anymore." they just kept quiet while clenching their hands, the sign of anger had already peaked.

"The night before Zaya left, I touched Zaya, I almost raped Zaya."

buk...

"What do you say?" bogem matured from the muscular hand Fahri hit my jaw, the pulse of the pain until my eyes darkened, but I continued to explain.

"I was drunk at the time, I regretted doing so, so I divorced Aisyah at the age of my marriage of 1 Week, I couldn't bear it all myself, the guilt always appears, Zaya's crying shadow continues to overshadow me until it feels like death is better, now I leave everything to you my whole self, just turn me off bang." I said with a cry that I really wanted to shed, everything I kept secret I could finally share with others, a little bit of my burden was gone, and I had accepted whatever the consequences were, if you have to die tonight I'm fine, just don't imagine Zaya's crying again.

"Son Ares wakes up" said Mr. Rudi.

I did not switch one bit, Rudi asked Fahri and his wife to go into the room to calm down.

"Let me here sir, I want to ask pardon to you, forgive my mistake that has destroyed your daughter."

"Son Ares, how far did you touch my daughter, was my daughter injured? have you taken his crown?"

"Why don't you keep going?"

"I realized, when Zaya cried and slapped me, when I was about to chase, my head hurt and after that I didn't know anymore."

"If in the morning you meet Zaya in a different state, if you really do what would you do?"

"meaning?"

Mr. Rudi's eyes glared far ahead without me knowing what he meant.

"Just answer my question."

"Maybe I am going to kill myself sir, I am really sorry, even touching Aisyah I always remember Zaya's screams and her tears spilling, she said, since Ijab kabul I touched Aisha's hand until a week I was married, Aisyah never got another touch from me, every Aisyah approached me dodging, I couldn't do it."

"Son, do you love my daughter?" I can only quietly get questions, Rudi.

"Will you believe me if I say I never had love for Ayesha, do you believe that my marriage is only the will of both families? then do you believe if your daughter has taken my sanity in the day before the wedding?" I asked repeatedly to Mr. Rudi, looking for one belief and thought.

"You know you love my daughter, why keep running a marriage that you'll know eventually."

"This is my fault, I was too cowardly when Zaya suddenly came and filled everything empty, I thought I could keep pretending, in fact I couldn't be much longer like this."

"Alright I already know, where should I take the road" said Mr. Rudi.

"How sir, what will you punish me with? I will be able to, if you want to kill me papa I am willing to be sorry I can get from my father and family."

Mr. Rudi smiled looking at me.

"If killing just soiled my hand, if telling you to die, too short is your punishment."

"So?"

"Marry Zayana, make her happy, make her forget all her pain, apologize from her, it's enough to punish you, my hard-nosed daughter Zaya, do it then sorry it'll be wide open for you."

Mr. Rudi stood up and told me to leave, and the night was over, I kept monitoring Zaya's every move, until we met for the first time and Zaya was back in the thick of emotions.