Nyctophile
Weddings

Lemas, that's what I think when the word legitimate rang at the wedding ceremony.

I still can't believe I'm the wife of a man who nearly raped me, we've become a couple.

The curtain that was attached as a barrier was opened, with me already standing wearing the white wedding dress of the second choice of the woman who had given birth to us.

My eyes kept on the floor without looking at this man, I was afraid I would scream or cry, the fear of touching became more real, but I confidently welcomed his hand and kissed his hand, simple yet scary thing for me.

A white gold ring with a simple little diamond was attached to my ring finger.

"Thank you." he said, then he kissed me on the forehead, as fast as lightning, my hand held his chest, I shook my head, he knew I didn't want to be touched, he nodded and closed his eyes.

I've said it's just a simple event, even though it's a title in one of the five-star hotels but the concept is just simple, I love roses, I love roses, so the flower decoration here is only wearing white roses, then my mother-in-law likes Javanese specialties and mother likes regional specialties, so all catering themed Nusantara culinary only, and so on, meanwhile my father-in-law likes classic decorations so European themed like this.

Throughout the show I could only smile, even though it was fake, at least no one knew what was going on behind the scenes, it seemed like I was already getting good at acting.

After the event was over, I asked all the flowers used in the decoration to be collected, the father was so, the plan is that some roses will be brought to my apartment and some will be brought to the house that Ares lives in.

Tonight the bed I'm in is no longer empty, there's Ares, but I don't know if I can share it with her or not, it's not that easy to accept Ares.

"Za," Ares entered my room.

"What's wrong?" ask me just.

"Until when should Za hear that word? didn't all your plans materialize? you've got Za, then what else? want anything? Za's heart? Za needs time!"

answer me bitterly.

"Not Za, I'm just apologizing, we haven't really spoken since then, I'm guilty of Za, forgive me, let me make up for everything, allow me to make you happy and remove all the pain and hate that you have felt all along."

I threw away my face, and I turned off the lights, I didn't want my tears to be seen by her.

"Why did the lights go out?" ask Ares who is still confused.

"In the dark you can't see anything, let it be like this, if you want to talk please continue" I said.

"So disgusted are you with me?" tanyanya back.

"If you want to talk continue, forgive me too."

"it's okay Za, if this is what you want, I will follow, I will continue to say, Indeed I am wrong, the feeling should not be present after I decide to marry someone, I will continue to say, but the more I get to know you the farther I get from Aisyah, until that night, my friends come to throw a bachelor party, they bring drinks, they bring drinks, I drank it once when I was stressed and that night I tried it again, just after texting you, I don't know if you really came and it was something we didn't want."

The lights are still out, I keep talking to him until the end I go in the bathroom and cry there, maybe my screams are heard, but I don't care, let him hear everything, everything he doesn't need to know, actually.