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Equally Lost
This time, Sara completely strengthened her heart, rounding off her determination to leave Belva's life. Perhaps the world will remember her as a bad mother because Sara left Evan, and gave up her birth baby completely in the care of Belva and Anin.
Despite an offer from Anin and asking Sara to stay, Sara actually decided that she chose to leave Evan and go away from the Belva Agastya family. It was not that she did not love Evan, that Sara loved her son dearly, but from afar and though there was no roof her affection would never end for her son.
Forgive Mommy, Evan …
Forgive Mother …
Let the world judge that Mother is a bad Mother …
A Mother who could leave her son, but Mother's Love for you is always there …
Mother's affection all the time and all your life for you.
And now, Sara's just sitting inside the station. The woman saw the passengers passing by, heard the sound of the train's arrival and departure notices. However, hours have passed and Sara is still sitting at the station without buying a ticket.
To be honest, there was nowhere Sara would go right now. Sara didn't know where to go. He is truly a man in this metropolis. While waiting and arranging her heart and mind, Sara chose to surf with search engines (Google) and look for boarding information that she can use for the next few months.
Apparently not waiting long, there is a lot of information on boarding places in the capital. Sara looked at each boarding house complete with facilities and prices with her gadgets. Estimate the right price and also fit in his pocket. He currently has money. Yes, the transaction money leases the uterus at the beginning which Belva paid to him. With the money, Sara will start looking for a hostel and a few days later she will plan to work. Because, not always Sara hangs her life from the money she has. Sara has to work to save her life.
I was sure of the room he was looking for. Sara called the phone number listed and will come to the boarding place. After that, Sara finally bought a ticket, Bogor became the place that Sara would go to at this time.
By riding the Electric Rail Train (KRL) Sara will go to the city of Bogor. In that city, Sara will organize her life, hoping that all the suffering and all the bitterness in her life can slowly be released. Sara will live by remembering Evan's memories with her.
Although it went not too far, it seems Bogor became a pretty good place for Sara. Maybe he can rent a boarding house for a while, after which Sara can buy public housing at an affordable price later.
***
While at the Belva residence, Anin seemed overwhelmed to calm baby Evan who was suddenly fussy. The woman carried Evan as she walked around, giving him ASIP, but Evan was still crying.
Anin was really tired to calm Evan down, the baby was crying loudly. Sometimes the tears flow, sometimes not. Perhaps the baby's bond with her birth mother is so strong that when Sara leaves the place, Evan becomes a tantrum.
Belva who was cleaning herself rushed to Anin, the man immediately asked Evan and carried him.
"You why Evan? Do you know that your mother is no longer here?" belva asked his son.
"Since wept, my dear. I tried to calm her down, but Evan was crying even louder" Anin replied.
Belva nodded, knowing that Anin had indeed tried to calm Evan down. Finally, Belva holds Evan and takes the baby to Sara's room.
"You miss the same Mother?" ask Belva again.
Although Evan can not speak, crying becomes one of the languages for babies. For that, Belva asked his son even though Evan would not answer him either.
Belva opens a storage cabinet in Sara's room, looking at who knows what Sara's clothes are left here. She said her clothes could calm a crying baby. Even if it was just a suggestion, in fact Belva took Sara's pajamas left in the closet and rubbed them slowly into Evan's body.
So magical, did not wait a long time, Evan's cry subsided. The baby was silent and as if babbling (babbling - the way the baby talks, babbling) and saw the ceiling of the room.
"Papa know, you must miss Mommy right? Your mother will be fine there. Hopefully in the next day, Mommy will come and re-nurture you, Evan," muttered Belva softly.
The man even lulls Evan to sleep in Sara's bed, and lets Evan play and tug at Sara's pajamas.
To be honest, seeing Evan now Belva's heart was hurt. Especially the level of Evan dominant with Sara. It was as if seeing Evan at this moment made Belva look at Sara.
Just as you requested, Sara …
I'll make sure Evan grows up healthy and happy.
Thank you very much Sara …
Thanks to you, I got Evan in my life.
He has really perfected my life …
It's just, it's just,
I also regret your decision to choose my death and Evan …
At the time I thought, we could raise Evan together …
You actually chose to go …
What considerations made you choose to walk away from me and Evan?
Should you go when we can continue to be together and raise our son?
Belva said in her own heart while observing baby Evan. His heart was so heartbroken, unfortunately again his feelings were not spoken this time. Belva can only monologue with her own heart. If Belva really asked and insisted before Sara that she would stay, could Sara's decision be changed?