Solihah Women the Love of the Heart
ep 50 - Tightness In The Chest
❤Because it is true, my prayer beads are still different from your rosary beads.❤
~POPBELA.COM~
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The sunlight began to sink, starting to go from the window of the house, leaving with full softness. I sat at the soup while watching a movie on television called mu'alaf that made me think of Morgan. Will Morgan be the same as the movie? Will Morgan be you'alaf and be my soul mate?
Brother Rangga who was playing mobile phones in the family room was disturbed by the noise of phone calls from my phone.
"Racao!" Rangga shouted to me.
"Yes, Brother!" my reply.
"This is the sound of your phone, noise!" said Kak Rangga. I immediately rushed to pick up my phone and I glanced at the name of the caller on my phone screen showing Morgan's name.
Raisa : "Assalamallaikum,"
Morgan: "Waalaikumsalam,"
Raisa: "Yes, Gan?"
Morgan: "Finally you pick up my phone,"
Raisa: "What's wrong? I've made it clear that our love can't be united!"
Morgan hasn't answered me yet, I turned off the phone first.
Thirty minutes later I heard a knock from the front door several times. I got up and rushed to open the door.
When I opened the door, it turned out that the one who came was Morgan. I looked into his eyes sharply. My heart started to beat. God, what is this feeling? I didn't know what to say to her as if my lips were shaking, my legs were limp and my gaze was blank.
"Raisa.." said Morgan softly. My mind is still beyond reason, not hearing Morgan's words.
"Raisa.." said Morgan again. I was surprised and turned my eyes the other way.
"Waa-wa... Waalaikumsalam.." I replied with a stammering word.
"Oh sorry! Assalamallaikum,"
"Waalaikumsalam," I replied with a wail.
"You why the hell? Gerogi ya deket handsome guy!" Morgan was joking with me.
"Morgan sorry, you better not see me again! I beg!" my tears started to flow down my cheeks.
"Why is Raisa? I love you so much..."
"I'm sorry Morgan, you better find another woman who believes in you! We can't be together, anyway," sobbing sobbing.
I can't say anything more. My lips are getting stiff. Morgan was still standing in front of my house still watching me while I went inside the house and sat down at the soup. I'm with Morgan not saying anything else. Morgan with me just exchanged looks with silence. I turned my eyes and rushed into the room.Tak long then Kak Rangga approached Morgan who was still standing there.
"You Morgan?" asked Rangga while holding Morgan's left shoulder. Morgan immediately glanced at Rangga's left hand on his shoulder.
"Who are you?" ask Morgan.
"I'm Raisa's sister" replied Rangga while inviting her into the House.
"Oh sorry, Brother!" Morgan began to panic.
"Not panic! I'm not a bad person, I just want to affirm to you, our world is different from yours, you're rich we're ordinary people, you're our honorable people are ordinary people,"
"But sister, I will accept Raisa as she is!" asserted Morgan.
"I know, but we have different beliefs with you. I beg you now to seek the faith of you and get away from Raisa!"
Morgan who heard the words from Kak Rangga Morgan immediately said goodbye from Kak Rangga and left my house.
Morgan's heart was devastated when he accepted all these realities, his mind crying, screaming and whining pain without blood.
"why should you Raisa? Why should you be the one I love? What a feeling this chest tightens!" inner Morgan screamed. I started the car and started driving.
***
It's been a week since Morgan last came to my house I've been trying to accept all the facts with a chest of air. I'm trying to start forgetting Morgan, who is still in control of my heart. This decision is absolute from myself, because it is useless if I continue to think about the uncertain I will get sicker and I will get further away from God.
"Asstagfirullahaladzim, is this a rebuke from Allah if I think too much about it than thinking about my Lord? Forgive your servant, O God." I said in my heart.
"Dar!" I woke up from my daydream.
"Ih! Brother Rangga makes me shocked deh.." I said while pouting.
"Why daydream?" asked Rangga while putting bread in his mouth.
"What the hell!" pissed me.
"Say you want to go to the bookstore?"
"Astagfirullahaladzim! Yes, thank you, brother? Ohhhhhh!" I immediately rushed off to go to the bookstore looking for materials to teach tomorrow.
"Hey, take a break!"
"Drug..."
Arriving at the bookstore I accidentally met my best friend Delia who is now officially his future wife Kak Rangga. In the bookstore I searched for books while exchanging stories with Delia. Delia is getting married to Rangga's sister next week.
"Eh Del, where have you been preparing?" ask me while paying the book to the cashier.
"A little more just spread the invitation," Delia replied.
"Thank God,"
"Where is your brother?" ask Delia back.
"Berez! Even Rangga's brother has spread the invitation,"
"So I can't wait!"
After paying for the book I was with Delia immediately rushed to find a cafe to eat for a while because there was still a lot to talk about.
"Eh Ca, how are you the same Morgan?" delia asked as she picked up the food in the menu book.
"You know what? If Morga's different beliefs with me." I said slowly.
"What?!" Delia surprise. I kept my index finger in front of her lips.
"Shhh! Slow down!"
"How come you never told me?" tanya Delia was curious to the point of forgetting to choose a menu.
"I just found out, too,"
"Continue?"
"Where is the solution?"
"Eslightly, if indeed the reason for your love is a matter of difference of belief you can make Morgan you'alaf first!" delia gave me advice.
"Are you crazy?!" I disagree with Delia's statement.
"You should try asking him! If Morga wants you'alaf means you're the same Morgan is a mate and if indeed he stays with his beliefs you have to let go and forget Morgan!"
"Yes, too." I lowered my head and tried to digest all the words that Delia said.
At night I sat on the edge of the bed playing with my phone. I think back to what Delia said about your Morgan'alaf. Does he want to be a mu'alaf? I remain unconvinced by the advice Delia gave me. I must wake up tonight to pray istiharah asking Allah for the best guidance for me.