HATE Before LOVE
A sweet waiting.

Elif.

They were silent for quite a while, an awkward silence filling the empty space between the two. Each is struggling with their thoughts.

"Do you hate me so much, Elif?"

"I'm..."

"Do I not deserve your trust?"

"It's not like that..."

"Well, I don't want to burden you, I'm leaving, I won't show up in front of you again, if my absence makes you comfortable and happy. Maybe you'll feel a lot calmer without me in your life. All you need to do is ask me to leave, and I'll go."

"Do you want to leave me? Didn't you promise not to leave me?"

"Of course I don't want to leave you. I was so frustrated wanting to spend every second of my life with you, but I couldn't be selfish either, forcing my heart and feelings on you that I was afraid would be a burden to you."

"Then never leave me. Don't break your promise."

"Ten-of course. But does this mean you..." Ardan hung up his sentence, staring at Elif full of hope.

Elif nodded, he lowered his head. He was sure now his cheeks must have been blushing, red like boiled shrimp.

"Yes Tuhaaan! Finallyoo!" Sontak Ardan shouted with excitement in the car, then suddenly Ardan got out of the car, running around the parking lot of the minimarket while his hands up like a footballer who celebrated after scoring, running around the parking lot while both hands up like a footballer who celebrated after scoring a goal, a wide smile was painted on his handsome face, the minimarket officer shook his head to see Ardan's behavior and once he got back into the car, his reflexes immediately hugged Elif, peeping Elif's head, forehead, and so on, right cheek, nose, left cheek and lips...

"Eh, sorry! I-i'm sorry! I'm just getting carried away, I'm too happy, I-"

"It's okay." Cut Elif.

Ardan took a breath and exhaled it full of relief.

"But..." Suddenly Elif turned soft.

"But what?"

"Are you going to love me anyway, stay by my side if you know what Mom just told me?"

"What did Mother Zehra say?"

"Mom says you're not my dad."

"Mother Zehra said that?"

Elif nodded. "But I don't believe."

"Why don't you believe it?" ask Ardan carefully. He was quite surprised Zehra had said so quickly.

"Of course, on my birth certificate it was clear that my father and mother were my parents, family cards and other documents showed that my father was my father. I don't understand why you can say that. Though I knew I was expecting my father to love me so much, I wanted to make my father proud of me, but my mother told me to stop expecting empty hope. I don't understand!" Elif's voice began to tremble, tears in his eyes.

Ardan certainly could not help but hug the tiny body of Elif as the woman he loved so much felt so devastated and sad. He could not imagine what if the Elif could remember everything, what Elif's heart would be like for the second time.

"Sshh." Ardan gently rubbed Elif's megar curly hair. "Have you asked me why I said that?"

Elif shaking.

"Well, come on, calm your heart first. Cool your head. After that, you can ask me what's the reason I said that. I'm sure your mother wasn't just talking."

"But I'm afraid, somehow I'm afraid to ask."

"What makes you afraid?"

"I'm afraid, what if it turns out that my father is not my father? Then who's my dad? Is it still alive? Does my real father love me? Or hate me too?" Elif raised his head, looking into Ardan's eyes. "Then can you still accept me? Is your family able to accept me if in fact I was banished by my real father?"

"really?"

"You have my word."

"But what about your family?"

"Hm, you could say mama and papa are not adherents of the system of finding a future husband or wife that must be seen from seedlings bebet and weights. The most important thing for mama and papa is the personality of the person himself, the background of what else social status is not the thing that becomes the benchmark for mama and papa. Most importantly, his son loved each other with heart and sincerity." Ardan explained casually.

"really?"

"Yes, I can guarantee it. Whoever your father is, you deserve and deserve to be happy and loved." Ardan summed up Elif's face with both palms.

"But I'm still scared. What if you've been hating me because I'm not his flesh?"

"If the reality is like that, then there are two things you get. First, you finally got the answer to your question all along, why don't you love me. Secondly, you no longer need to sacrifice or strive for her, you no longer need to disappoint your heart with empty expectations."

"If it's true, can I live a happier life?"

"Maybe, since you've only been depressed about it all the time, you've always been sad about it, you've always been disappointed about it."

"Do you think I can accept the reality if it's like that?"

"Listen baby, you.. hey why did your cheeks so blush I called you baby? Is your heart pounding too?"

"Ardan, it's not the time to tease me!" Omel Elif while hitting Ardan's arm and rewinding his body. Because his heart was indeed pounding hearing Ardan calling him with 'Honey'.

"I'm sorry, you're just gonna make me so nervous if you're blushing like that." Ardan pinched slowly on Elif's cheek. "Alright, back to the topic. Can you accept the reality later? Hm, I think anyone who was in your position at first will definitely feel very beaten, sad and incredulous, of course. You're gonna need some time alone. But I'm sure, if you're able to expand your heart, take it all in and accept it, you'll understand."

Elif took a deep breath and then exhaled a long one. The look in his eyes did not dismiss him so scared and worried. Ardan grabbed Elif's hand, rubbed it and grasped it, flowing warmth and calmness to Elif.

"You're not alone, baby. There's me, Adit, your friends, mother. Don't be sad alone, okay?"

Elif nodded.

"Please promise me, whatever mother's reasons may be, you won't hold on to your grief alone."

Elif nodded again.

"Well, I'll drive you home now, look at one in the morning."

"But I don't feel like going home."

"Don't talk like that, you're gonna torture me like that."

"Why is that?"

"I refrained from calling Teddy."

"What does Mr. Teddy have to do with this?"

"Because I want to ask him to bring a ruler right now, so I can instantly make you completely mine and take you straight to my apartment."

"God!" Elif hit Ardan's arm, a little hard though it didn't give any effect. "Alright, let's go home" Elif said at last, shaking his head at Ardan's random thoughts.

"Where to? Your house? To my apartment? Or to my new house?" Ardan Temptation. Ah, she loved to see the cheeks on Elif's face blushing cute like that.

"Ardan! Holy hooch! Take me home to my house now, your mind's getting hushier."

Ardan laughs. He rattled the top of Elif's head fondly, until it made Elif laugh. And the car also left the minimarket parking lot.

I was right, Ardan can make me feel calmer. I no longer even felt any uneasiness as her large, warm hand carried my hand within hers.