My name is Ayu
Chapter 50

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The udon noodles we ordered were cold. There was no appetite left in me. Gone already. Vaporized along with hundreds of tears that continued to flow nonstop.

A lot of diners were staring at me. They must have thought that I was being bullied by my own In-laws, like in soap operas. The reality is not like that.

Mama Lia didn't tell me to leave her son and told me to stay with Dio at all times. Selfish indeed, I realize that. However, Mama Lia is a mother who emphasizes the happiness of her child above all else. Even on my own suffering. Above the pain and pain of my heart now.

I was trying to breathe normally, I had my nose blocked because most of the time I was crying. My voice sounded dumb too. I gotta talk. I have to voice my heart. Maybe if with Papa Putra I do not have the courage, but if the same Mama Lia I would be brave.

"Honestly Ma, Ayu did not have that much confidence to stay by Dio's side. A wife who is willing to be polygamous usually has a belief that her husband will still return to her someday. Because what? Because the wife believes that there is love in her husband's heart for her. Although there are other women who liked her husband still love is only for one wife. Unlike Ayu and Dio, Ma. We just have a sense of belonging because we depend on each other in difficult times. We support each other like friends when it's hard. Not the kind of love Dio gave Sheila."

I wiped a few drops of tears that came back to flow.

"When Ayu allows Dio polygamy, then Ayu is ready to lose Dio forever. Dio doesn't love Ayu, Ma. Ayu is just Cherleaders screaming on the sidelines in support of Dio's every move. Ayu's existence is only as a peramai atmosphere only. Ayu will just go, Ma. I think second choice is better for everyone. Ayu will back off, Ma. For the happiness of everyone. Especially for Dio's happiness."

"You're not cherleaders, Yu. You're Mama's daughter-in-law and son. You're the main character in Dio's life movie. I don't want to lose my dream daughter-in-law like you. Don't say that, Yu. Mama sure there's your name in Dio's heart. Mama knows very well the nature of her own child. All you need to do is be patient and wait for Dio beside you. No one knows what the future holds, Yu. It's possible that Dio actually loves you, only Dio hasn't noticed yet. You who love Dio so sincerely as you are now have changed Dio. Mama's sure of it, Yu."

I glanced at the clock on my HP. We have been talking for too long while my break will be over soon. Free to continue this conversation, Mama will only continue to persuade me to be willing to be polygamous by Dio.

"Let's go back to the office again, Ma. Ayu's work piled up because it had not been concentrated." I took my wallet and stood up from my seat.

"Yes. Mama's gonna take you." My mother followed me up.

"Wait a minute, Yu." I stopped my steps in front of a cake shop. "Mom's gonna buy some cake first."

"Let's just wait here, Ma." Mama entered the cake shop and soon came out with 1 large paper bag and 1 small paper bag.

"Come on. Mama's driver is in the lobby."

I just kept quiet the whole trip. At least the mummy in my head diminished a little after talking to Mama. Yeah, just a little. The rest feel tightness in the chest that is increasing.

"Yes, think again. Mama's gonna back off the time Papa gave her until Sheila gets home. You think it's okay."

"Father can't promise anything, Ma." I don't want to make Mama expect more of my decision.

"Yes Dear. Oh yeah, this." She gave me two paper bags that she brought. "You didn't eat. Mama bought bread and cake. Eat with your friends."

"Good thanks, Ma." I got out of the car and went into the office.

When I arrived in the room, the first Mother Goddess immediately commented when she saw me. "Geez, Yu. Ma'am guess after the streets you are more fresh. This is even your eyes swollen, much more swollen than before. Where are you crying?"

"No, Ma'am. Oh yes, this is from my Mother-in-law for all of you." I don't know why my team-mates saw it all in my direction. "I'm really okay. Why is everyone thinking about me like that?"

The Goddess walked right up to me. "Yu, aren't you talking wrong? Mama-in-law? You married, Yu?"

The words of Mother Goddess awakened me. I closed my mouth with both hands. Oh my.... Why can't this mouth even be cooperated with?

Mas Adi, Mas Bagus and Mbak Dewi immediately surrounded me. They took a chair and looked at me. I was like in court.

"So, did you marry Yu?" Ma'am Dewi asked again but in a soft voice so that no one heard him other than our team.

I bit my lower lip. I can't hide this reality anymore. "Yes, Mother. I'm married." I said while looking down. I dare not look at them all.

"When?" Madam Dewi interrogated me again.

"Almost 6 months ago." The three of them were compactly exhaling heavy breaths. I know because of me they could get in trouble with HRD.

"But I just got married religiously, Ma'am. I haven't registered our marriage. And today I will sign the appointment letter to be a permanent employee at 2 pm. But it's up to you guys anyway. If you guys want to complain to me about HRD I'm okay."

Mother Goddess held both my shoulders. "We'll keep it a secret, Yu. We don't want to lose you either. I'll be able to do your job again." I ventured to raise my head and see my Grandmother smile like an angel.

"Thank you, Ma'am." I turned to look at Mas Adi and Mas Bagus who looked sad. "Then Mas Adi and As Nice how? Want to report me to HRD?"

"Yes, Yu. We are both sad. We lost the angel again. I was ngincer you. If only I hadn't married." Good words made me laugh.

"So, are you flanked by your in-laws? How is it getting sad?" The words of Mbak Dewi made Mas Bagus and Mas Adi giggling immediately fell silent and put up an ear to hear my answer.

I shook my head. "I have a problem, Mother. You guys just calm down. I'm fine."

*******

5 Hours over 20 minutes. I was out of the office longer than usual. Let Dio wait for me while being bitten by a mosquito like I usually feel.

I lazily stepped into the usual waiting stop. Sure enough, Dio was waiting on his scoopy bike. He smiled at my arrival.

Dio got off the bike and put a helmet on my head. "Tumben you long, Yu. I usually wait here for me. A lot of work, huh?"

"Just be lazy." I sat in the back seat and remained silent. I also no longer hugged Dio, I held on to the iron behind the seat.

"Well, you want to eat first?" Dio was making small talk to me.

"No." Answer's short.

Dio no longer talks to me. He realized I was angry. Either angry with himself or angry with the situation.

Dio did not turn his motorcycle directly towards the house, but he instead stopped his motorbike in the park near the house. He took off his helmet and got off the bike.

"Down yuk, Yu."

Dio continued walking into the garden area. He sat on an empty swing nobody played. Obviously empty, at 7pm where is there a parent who lets his child roam in a park this big? Could have kidnapped Kalong Wewe if said Mama mah.

Not Jakarta name if 7 o'clock not much hanging out in the park. Many couples are dating in the park. I walked up to Dio and sat on the swing beside him.

Dio took out a pack of cigarettes and a gas match from his bag. Since when does Dio smoke? During my marriage to Dio I never once saw him smoke. I have never smelled a cigarette in his body. Does he vent his stress by smoking?

Dio smelled cigarette smoke violently. He doesn't enjoy smoking like other smokers.

"What about hiring your employees today? Are you a sign?"

"Udah."

"Finally. You are a permanent employee as well. Congratulations to you."

"Hem." I answered lazily.

"Sheila finally replied to my message after almost thousands of messages I sent her. He said his shoot in Switzerland and Paris was almost done. He'll be home soon." Dio took another sip of his cigarette.

"Good dong. Will you marry her sooner? You must be very upset with him, right?" I said cynically.

"Come, Yu. I'm used to being left behind by him. Her career as an international model required her to frequently shoot overseas. At first I was very proud of my profession. My friends often say that I am very lucky to have a girlfriend of a beautiful model like Sheila. No hypocrite, I'm also happy to hear their praise."

Dio's eyes glared far away. He was remembering something. "I've known Sheila since High School. He's my school's flower. Thanks to the incitement of my friends I finally dared PDKT with him. We finally made it. Our relationship lasted long enough. This year we are dating for 7 years. I'm also the one supporting her career as a model."

"His face and proportionate body attracted a lot of interest from the agency to sign her as a model. He also accepted their offer. It was only once or twice a photo shoot, but fame started to take hold of it. She quit college and focused on modeling."

"We rarely met. It starts once every 2 weeks. Then once a month. Sometimes every 3 months. And lastly now, 6 months. I've banned him from leaving, but he still wants to pursue his career. For him this is a rare opportunity and will further boost his career."

Dio threw away the cigarette butts he had finished smoking. He lit another cigarette and took another sip.

"7 years together is not a short time. I was determined to marry her. There are so many wonderful fantasies I have had with him. Dreams will have many children with her. He will eat at home and enjoy his cooking. Fancied going abroad with him."

"All changed. Sheila could not be contacted because her HP was held by her Management. Work at the office is stressful for the pressure. Warnings were issued, causing me more stress. And finally we are met with extraordinary circumstances until we get married. In my mind after we got married is how I should support my wife with my own work. I fixed up my job at the office until my boss finally acknowledged my work."

"I also felt that one of my fantasies was being able to eat and enjoy my wife's cooking at home, and that it wasn't Sheila who was my current wife but you. I haven't been able to travel out of the country. But the streets in the market just as you have made me happy. Exit the traditional market to find the cheapest price to save money. It's not something that's in my delusion of Yu."

"It's good dong. Later Sheila home you can realize your other fantasies. I'm sorry if you couldn't make it happen." I said with annoyance.

Dio turned off his cigarette butts. Then he smiled at me. "Don't be jealous first. I haven't finished the story."

"Who is jealous?" I folded my hands on my chest and put my lips together.

"I'll continue ya." I didn't answer Dio's words. He also continued his story. "I'm starting to enjoy a simple life with you. Eat Bacol. Eat with a side dish of tempeh and tofu. How can this feel fun? It's like I've got a new friend, a comrade in arms."

"Then you began to push me to go further to reach my dreams. Making something from nothing into something. Burning my little wooden toy even has a fantastic selling price. There I began to marvel at your mindset. At first I thought you were beautiful, the more here you are the more beautiful. Beautiful heart and everything."

"Maybe you are not the most beautiful delusion that I dreamed of Yu, but you are the most beautiful reality that is by my side right now. Imagination can disappear and change with new delusion. But when reality disappears, it will be difficult to live a new life."