Savingswoman
76. Past Times

“No, don't be like that. Law me. Hit me. Whatever it is, do everything you want to punish me. Even you can slap my insolent mouth that has spouted out those curse words. And also, you can hit my feet which brazenly leaves you in a deserted place.” Farel asked for both hands to beg. His eyes implied many wounds. Injuries due to the actions he took, actions that made his female devotee feel pain.

Raisya. Seeing, and hearing Farel like that made him moved to embrace the strong body whose life is very fragile.

“Not to overdo it like that. Just take a lesson from every event that happens. Even if I hit, beat, or even kill you, the memory of your behavior can't just disappear.” Raisya threw away face.

The woman preferred to look at the balcony of the room rather than at that pitiful face. He does not want to melt and give more leeway. His decision was unanimous, and he did all this for the good of the man. Raisay wants the man to be more able to think logically, and think about every decision that the man will take.

Farel raised his head, looking timidly at the face of Raisya who looked reluctant to look at him. The pain suddenly hit his chest, making his breathing choked, as well as tightness.

“I'm sorry.” Farel clasped Raisya's hands tightly.

Raisya nodded her head with a face that remained facing the balcony. The woman was too confused to behave.

Farel closed his eyes, trying to make a big decision in his life. As powerful as that man inhaled a deep breath. Not that a relationship must be based on honesty, maybe now is the time to tell everything, including the dark story first.

“Raisay, I want to be honest and tell you something.” Farel looked at Raisya's sideways face.

Raisya who heard the speech quickly turned her eyes to look at Farel's different-looking face. A mixture of sadness, sadness, anger, and longing?

“Actually, the night I left you I went to see Salsha.” Farel lowered his head. The man's behavior is exactly like the husband who was caught cheating.

“Oh! Isn't it natural, leaving a mistress to meet his rightful wife.” Raisya answered with all his might, dispelling the sudden sense of tightness.

“No, that's not what I meant. I met Salsha in the hospital, she had a miscarriage,” Farel said with a hardened jaw.

Raisya could not cover his surprised look, even unconsciously his hand rejected the rough tanga burly Farel. While Farel who saw the surprised look of Raisya and the woman's rejection clenched his hand tightly, as if holding back his fear.

“I'm so sorry,” Raisya said sincerely.

“She miscarried, but I could have sworn that the child she was carrying was not my son.” Farel looked seriously at Raisya.

Raisya. He was not surprised by that fact. However, he tried to make his face look like disbelief.

“What do you mean?”

“I__ I never touched Salsha at all.” Farel closed his eyes. Recalling the harsh words Salsha uttered due to her lack of it.

“You didn't touch Raisay because you touched me.”

“No, not like that. But I never touched Salsha at all. From the past, even before meeting you.”

“You__ you really have heart. How can you let your wedding bed cool. Don't you need a woman. Although women seem silent, but you as a Sumi should understand your duty to fulfill the birth and bathin.” Rasiya looked at Farel in disbelief. Hearing the facts directly from Farel made him many times surprised.

“Not, I don't want to. But I can't. Me, impotant.”

“What do you mean Impotent? I still vividly remember how savage you fucked me and harassed me.”

“If you're cured, why don't you go back with your wife and give a living?”

Farel closed his eyes tightly, trying to dispel the embarrassment that had suddenly appeared. “I can only react with you.”

“What do you mean? Don't talk nonsense!”

“No, I could have sworn I was honest. I don't know why I could be like that either. All happened without me being able to control.”

“Oh, so that's why you made me your mistress?”

“I'm sorry, it was originally like that. But everything changed after I loved you. I want to make you my only wife.”

Raisya closed his eyes, trying to forget this very strange discussion. How could an Impotant be healed with only a certain person? Maybe more precisely trauma. Recalling Jesika's explanation of Farel's condition. If so, not trauma can only be healed through the person concerned, or even people associated with the onset of trauma itself.

“Ok, so you went to see your wife who miscarried. Fine, I accept your reason.”

“No, I left you not because I wanted to see Salsha, but I left you because of my Grandma's threat.”

Raisya raised her eyebrows. His eyes gave Farel code to continue his story.

“My grandmother forced me to come. Even meghancam wouldn't consider me anymore if I was late or didn't even come to see Salsha. You know, all this time I only had a Grandma.” Fael looks at Raisya.

Sigh for a moment, then continue his words. “Today I've always been considered an unlucky child. I was born by mistake. My parents got married because I was between them. Even I was born just when my family's company was destroyed.” Farel paused his sentence for a moment. Smile bitterly and look away there.

“Cacian, insults, even blows I always receive. Everyone seems to blame me. Even the servants bullied me. I was a kid and I didn't understand anything. The world looks cruel to me. But everything changed when my sister was born. He was born and carried a positive aura. The threatened company went out of business quickly crooked. My parents, everyone flattered her and spoiled her.” Farel smiled smirkingly. However, in his eyes there was a twinkle of happiness.

“If you ask me do I hate my sister? Answer's no. I never hated my sister. Since my sister was born, I rarely get any ill treatment, although it still can't be said to be good, at least I can eat rice once a day, and that rice is still worth eating. They were all so focused on pleasing my sister that they forgot to torture me.” Farel closed his eyes tightly. It shuns memory when they force him to swallow cockroaches raw.

“All feels beautiful, even without their knowledge, my sister often meet me, even share snacks in their possession. He is my little angel, the angel who gives light in the gloom of my life. He gave me light in the midst of the darkness that struck.” Farel. For a moment the man closed his powerful eyes, gritted his teeth, even as the corners of his eyes were wet.

“However, my little angel could not last long, he had to leave because of my mistake. I should've been kidnapped, why my sister was too. They tortured my little brother, my angel, even they sadistically abused him. I could not see their cruel behavior, but I heard and saw the results of their cruelty. I'm almost crazy to hear my sister's scream. However, there is a kind little girl who closes both my ears and lays down words that are comforting.” Farel smiled faintly. Remember it back to the little girl he had forgotten the shape of his face. A second later that thin smile turned into an angry growl.

“I should have died. My sister shouldn't have turned herself in, I should have been the one being harassed, I should have been the one being thrown in the middle of the road. My sister's body was destroyed, even I can't recall how handsome my sister's face was.” Farel was crying in silence. Her tears fell on every word she said.

“the cinema hates me, everyone loves me. The behavior they gave off was even more cruel. They even forced me to look at the scene design, a disgusting scene that I should never have seen. However, they always say, I must remember to death, like the last seconds of my sister's death.” Farel clenched a strong hand. While Raisya who had been silent from the beginning could not stop the rate of her tears.

“Grandma came, grandma saved me. Grandma gave me a joy I didn't feel. Grandma also always gave me food that I never felt. Grandma everything, Grandma everything for me. Because of Grandma, I can still survive. Because Grandma I can be a figure you like this. I'm sorry I couldn't choose you when Grandma threatened me.” Farel lowered his head.

“However, I promise, will choose you no matter what. I'll make Grandma understand about the situation now.” Fare looked at Raisya with a serious face. The brown net looked red, and did not forget the face that had been soaked in tears, so did Raisya.

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