Colorless Rainbow
Colorless Rainbow #Episode 189

Lexi walked limply after seeing the two doctors, her heart growing more and more unruffled. The feeling that initially will be happy because it has met the prospective baby, in fact Lexi is actually increasingly haunted by feelings of guilt. He could not continue his footsteps to walk. The chair in the corner became his place to rest his limp body.

It felt, as if his soul was half gone, claustrophobic from being gnawed away by a feeling of guilt. Regrets who don't know how to get through it. His body trembled violently, each imagining how much pain Elin had suffered. Doctor Eki explained everything. How is the picture of pain that Elin felt so far.

"I must come and confess my guilt and ask Elin and her family for forgiveness. Accepted or not that's the most important thing lately right now I have to show you that I'm sorry. If I just keep quiet I'm sure Elin won't know that I'm sorry for what I did." Lexi strengthened her heart.

After he felt confident and strong, now the man again swung his legs with half-trained, but before visiting Elin, Lexi first wanted to see Lucas. There's a lot Lexi wants to tell her family about, especially Elin.

******

"Well, where are you going?" asked Elin who saw her parents tidy and carrying a bushel, as if they were going to visit a sick room. Eric and Darya exchanged lyrics, they were confused about what to answer. But suddenly Elin smiled sweetly.

"Then you are careful on the road," added Elin, the woman with a distended stomach seemed to understand very well that her parents would find her twin sodara.

"Elin is okay. Not that he's your son either. Elin will not be angry," said Elin when she saw her parents as if feeling guilty.

"Then we go well," Darya replied, with a voice that sounded less excited. Jiara who was beside Elin could only give strength by grasping Elin's fiancee, and the pregnant woman gave a smile to her sister-in-law.

"Elin is okay. Calm brother. Maybe it's time for Elin to open the door sorry," said Elin, but Jiara immediately looked at Elin with a surprised look. Jiara's feelings were not calm when suddenly Elin resigned to this fate. And with an open heart to forgive her twin sodara.

"Elin, are you sick? Why do you say it like that, Brother feels different with you," said Jiara as she stroked Elin's hand. "You're no longer sick, or you're hiding something. All this time you've been saying nyidam turns out there's something sick that you keep secret?" jiara's boyfriend, who has seen Elin for some time now, is very different.

As before, Elin smiled calmly. "Silver said what the hell. Elin is fine. About cravings and stomach pain was pure cravings nothing Elin covered up. Forgive Lucas. Elin only remembered what Papah said. As far as Elin hides at the end and in fact we remain sodara. We'll meet someday. Only a decisive time will be sooner or later. Elin can hide and Elin can run, but that will only waste Elin's power. In fact, Elin's efforts will be in vain. We'll meet."

Jiara continued to look at Elin calmly and not the slightest bit of Jiara saw the sad Elin. "So, I'm glad you finally forgave Lucas. Honestly Brother was also angry with him, but came back again. Man only carries out the scenario God gives. Bitter, sweet we have to swallow, this is how the wheel of life is not smooth." Jiara stopped her words. His eyelids warmed up, and when he had to remember again the dark events befall him.

Elin also knew Jiara's sadness, and she just quietly listened to her sister-in-law tell her story. They were indeed close, but never told each other, especially the problem of their distress. Elin needs to know that Jiara was not easy until she could accept Lucas to remain her husband after she knew that Lucas was the one who had raped her. He wants Lucas to disappear from him, but he also can't be selfish his son needs his papah. And Jiara always said that it is better for the wicked to repent than the good ones who are not sincere.

"As a victim of abuse I also know how you feel. Although my fate may be better than yours, because I am not the victim of violence as you feel, but our fate is not much different Elin. You may be luckier when you fall you still have parents, Papah you are really there for you until God replace your grief and your patience with a family that is very dear to you. While me? I had to be trained to find a place to shelter with a pregnant condition. It's not crazy that I'm grateful. My father since my mother died my depression was the same, but when I sought happiness I was robbed until I was harassed by Lucas and pregnant with Zakia. Lagging in the streets. If God didn't love me, I might be dead. I don't know how many times I tried to kill myself, but God always saved me. Not only did Zakia somehow try to abort him, but God again also gave help until this moment. I can't forget all my travels. Day by day I still remember how my life journey was full of struggle. I'm sure you will think the same of me. Better to forgive than to keep a grudge. Our hearts are sick."

Jiara let out her tears as she recalled her foolishness. Not only Jiara who cried Elin was crying when she heard the story of Jiara that Elin did not think that the journey was very heavy.

"Elin thought only the saddest story of Elin turned out that Big Brother was no less sad." Elin hugged Jiara warmly.

A calm smile was seen from Jiara's beautiful face. Elin had been listening to what Jiara had said. Amazed, that was what Elin had in mind.

"Elin wants to be like Brother Jiara who can accept with this fate so sincere. That's right what Brother said. When we cannot forgive the heart is also not calm. Sis... Teach Elin to be sincere like Big Brother. Elin also wants to live a quiet life like a normal person, not a vengeful, but sometimes the heart is still not sincere. When the pain we feel is so great, but we only reply with forgiveness. Elin is not yet sincere," isak Elin.

Jiar rubbed Elin's back gently. "No idea what you're feeling. But believe me, we forgive without punishment, but they already feel condemned. They are now feeling the punishment of God. And when we forgive, they feel the punishment. God knows how to rebuke his servant."

"Thank you for giving Elin this very valuable advice. Elin will try to resign like Big Brother, and be sincere about what Elin should live." They hugged each other to strengthen.

*********

Lucas sat very languidly, his body very different from before. Her weight is reduced a lot. The long hair and the dull face had shown that he was in there the man was already tormented.

"Until when will you be like this? Is it not enough to live four months in prison? Don't you feel sorry for your son and wife?" Lexi who initially will confide in the problem instead advises Lucas who is increasingly concerned about his condition.

Lexi is still thinking about what Arya and Philip say who are afraid that Lucas even became depressed and the fall of events like Darya repeated again. Because he continues to feel guilty.

"What is my family news?" lirih Lucas to Lexi.

"Why don't you just come out of this place and see the condition of the loe family" said Arya Lexi.

"Gue isn't ready yet" Lucas replied lightly.

"Who will be until when? Do you think I'm ready for this surprise? I'm not ready either. But at least I'm not a coward who hides behind a prison without fighting for an apology, without trying to fix things."

"Gue was confused as to where Lex should start. I don't know where to start everything's against me. Everyone hates me" Lucas said, in a resigned tone.

"Who said that?" The sudden sound made Lucas san Lexi grab his face simultaneously.

Whose voice is the turtle?