Damar: Love Is On The Way
PHP

Pinnacle POV

Me, maybe love you.

The sacred words coming out of Leon's mouth echoed through my mind like a playlist of songs in mp3. Repetitively. The sentence swirled around in my head since I first managed to fly off Leon's thin lips and landed right on my head. My brain is boiling thinking about it.

I want to laugh. But I found no good reason to laugh. That sacred sentence of Leon felt stuck in the heart. Yeah, there's something in there and I can't find the right word to say it.

Maybe, said. Is he not sure of his own words? What kind of feeling is that? There's a lot of uncertainty there. I took a breath and let out the wind from inside my lungs with a single blow. I want to bring out everything that stands in my heart but I don't know how. Where should I start?

Cellphone's ringing.

'Ca, I miss! We'll have lunch together, in the usual place.'

I read a short message through the green app from Jihan. How fortuitous. I want to hear his voice. Curate more precisely.

"Why you?" Nola's harassing me again. He raised his chin slightly, peering through his microscope-eye the message I read before his face was glued to my face.

"No, I'm reading a message" I said honestly.

"Cooking? Your face is like seeing a ghost" Nola continued. Can't my face lie even a little? Leon's sacred words are still bothering me and what should I do? If only he had the ability to read minds, I would be the first to run. I don't want to be read. My mind's blowing because of Leon's words.

I ignored him and typed in a reply message for Jihan.

"What do you want to eat?" Karin who was originally staring at the folding computer in front of her spoke up. The digital clock on the bottom right corner of the laptop shows twelve hours less than ten minutes. Lunch time is almost here.

"I'm not coming, I'm sorry, I have an appointment" I said, then tidied up my desk and put my phone in my bag. They're watching me.

"You want to date Damar? Or Leon?" Nola Goda. He played his eyebrows and exchanged glances with Karin.

The damar? I don't even know where he is. Last time I met, yesterday morning and last night he no longer came to the apartment to bother me. I should have been happy but I felt something strange. Especially if I remember my conversation with him. One-sided conversation because the beautiful-skinned man was silent. I felt my heart no longer shake.

Leon's? I don't know what feelings I have for her. I thought I liked him but after he said his heart, I was overwhelmed. I don't know how to. I don't feel the same vibe that makes my heart dance as free as it did with Damar.

"The room or Leon?" urge Nola to break my inner struggle.

"Not both."

"Yahhh .. "the bright smile on his face disappeared instantly.

"Okay, I'll go first, yeah, maybe I'll be back around two in the afternoon" I said.

"Where?"

"Servant."

I shuffled from the chair then pulled the pale green sling bag and hung it on my left shoulder. I walked quickly to the door so that they would no longer put together questions that I had no answers to.

I drove my bike at maximum speed and arrived at Senayan city twenty minutes later.

After parking the motorbike I easily found our favorite spot. A cozy restaurant and has a warm atmosphere.

"Hi, you've been a long time," I said so close to the bench on which Jihan was sitting.

"Just now" he said, raising his face.

"Have message?" I said and sat down. I watched her flat belly continue to bulge like a watermelon.

"Yep, as usual."

"I want more ice cream" I said. Ice cream is a moodbooster for me other than chocolate, of course.

"You have a problem" Jihan said. He knows, I often eat ice cream when I lose my spirit but not everything is true. I'm an ice cream enthusiast.

I sighed softly for the umpteenth time today. Jihan looked at me with her round eyes, her lips forming a straight line. He was waiting for me to say something.

"Actually, Leon ... She said, 'she likes me, maybe loves me' she said, "I told Jihan. I want to know his opinion. I told Leon to Jihan. Jihan also knew him, at least knowing that Leon had donated a gold medal to campus as a taekwondo athlete.

"Then ...,"

"Then, I said what you just said," I'm honest. Whether he understands my words or not.

"You mean how?"

"So, after Leon says 'Been, I like you, I may, love you' I just gawk and then say 'then'."

"Continuously," he said more excitedly. I wanted to tell her the details but all I remembered was her sentence which weighed me down. Then what kind of feelings have I had for Leon?

"Crashe!"

"No, I mean Leon's reaction?"

"That's all?" I'm nodding. "Then, how are you? What's your response." He became very excited, his eyes glistening with light.

"Nothing, he just said he liked me and didn't ask me how I felt about him." He breathed a disappointed breath.

"But you like this Leon guy, don't you?"

"I don't know ... I thought I'd be happy when Leon said he liked me but I felt burdened. I didn't want to hurt her by rejecting her while she never asked for answers. I can't take it either. I can't deny my little heart that says this isn't what I really want. I myself don't know what kind of feelings I have for her."

"Are you close to another man?"

"Not really," I said lying. In fact, I was confused by my closeness to Damar. We are not close at all. Our relationship is as unclear as Leon's sentence.

"You know, I'd like to introduce my cousin" the god. Jihan still did not give up on her efforts. He wanted me to marry his cousin who he thought was handsome.

"I'll think about it if she's planning on getting married" I said.

"I doubt, you're really serious about what you're saying," he seemed to catch a prank in my answer.

"You're right, I don't want to run from Leon, at least until I find an answer that keeps me steady."

"Betul, not in php, kill him. After all, you have to give an answer even if it is not asked. Don't want to, right, on the php handyman's stamp." Do I have to give an answer to my love for me who is still 'maybe' it? What kind of answer should I give while I have no answer. I also don't understand what my own desires are. I want something certain but Leon's love statement contains a lot of uncertainty.

"So, what do you think I should do?"

"All you know is the answer! Listen to your heart and stop using your head. It's a matter of feeling."

"But I have to be realistic."

"Realistic logic will make you happy."

"Happy is not because it is realistic or always logical, but because it is a happy heart. Nothing can make the heart happy except the heart itself."

"Alright, well, whatever your decision is, I will always support you. One thing you must remember, if you are looking for the perfect, you will lose the best" Jihan reminded. I've heard that phrase dozens or even hundreds of times. Is Leon the best?

"Why is your sentence as if Leon is the best for me. Can you predict the future? Do you see Leon is my soul mate."

"Who said that," he said. His lips formed a curved line and then he stroked his enlarged stomach.

"So what was it?"

"I'm just telling you to open your heart" the correction.

"I've opened my heart" I asked. I always open my heart. I just don't want to waste my time in an obscure relationship just waiting for men to say 'will you marry me, marry me, or be the mother of my children'. I don't want to wait. I'm not a stop or a terminal waiting.

"Yes, just open it, but don't let anyone in and fill it up." I had to roll my eyeballs to respond to Jihan's words. Filling up what kind? Any gallons? Jihan might not understand what I mean.

"Why do you sound like my mother" I said.

"If you are still in doubt, it is better to follow my advice" he continued in a soft but clear voice to be heard.

"Which one are you?"

"Meet my cousin's brother and be his wife." I've guessed. In the end Jihan still wants to match me with her cousin. This Javanese-sundanese descendant girl has a typical Sundanese female face. Clean white skin, beautiful eyes and thin lips.

"Again ...? "

"Yes, I would love to be your brother" he exclaimed with a big smile on his face. Showing a row of well-groomed white teeth.

"So all this time I wasn't your brother" I said pretending to be upset.

"It's different, different in the eyes of the law," he said. Jihan is the best friend I've had since college. The only place I pour out all sorts of stories without fear in jugde. "Therefore, you have to come to my baby shower next week, I mean, this week, next week again," she said, clarifying the meaning of her sentence.

I patted my own forehead.

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Okay, dear readers, author mo ngingetin again. don't forget likes, comments and votes yes😍😍😍😍

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kisser

Nina K's.