Dear The Ex
Apply (Again)

I was reading the tour and travel report that I had taken in my brother's office, occasionally turning towards my two children and Mario who still seemed to be joking.

Indeed it is Sunday night, and the clock was just showing at 08:00 p.m. That is why my two sons are not sleepy. Especially Bobby who is maghrib just woke up.

I again tried to focus on reading the report, when the sound of Meka's laughter was very loud.

I don't know what Mario did, so my daughter laughed out loud.

It's not that I didn't realize that Mario also often stole a glance at me. But I tried not to care, because I was afraid that this afternoon would happen again.

"Oh, Papa, we're eating outside" Meka said in a loud voice that made me have to go back to concentration because I turned to her.

I took a deep breath, then stared softly at Mario with a pouting face.

"Mumping night sunday Intan. We haven't been around for a long time" said Mario quickly because he knew I was angry.

"If you want to eat out, please eat by yourself. But me and the kids don't. Because my report is not finished I read" I replied as I lifted the report I had put on the table.

Mario tried to smile at my answer. While both my children immediately put on a sour face.

"Come buk once in a while. We haven't eaten out in a long time"

"No, baby, I still have a lot of work. The report from your sir has not been finished I read"

"If we were the only ones to leave without Mother, may we?" this time Bobby asked

Finally the report in front of me, I'm closed. Then I walked towards the three of them

"Where do you want to eat?. It's night, mending ibuk aja masakin for you, later we eat it at home only"

Meka and Bobby then turned to look at Mario, looking at Mario's face for consideration

"What the hell is okay, the important thing is to eat the same mother" replied Mario smiling towards my two children

And I put on a smile hearing Mario say

Until I finally came down. Then check the rice cooker and also take some groceries for me to process in the refrigerator

"Need help ? ask Mario towards me who is chopping onions

I just glanced at Mario, then continued my work without answering his question

And I was surprised when I found out Mario wrapped both his hands around my waist

Quickly, I immediately tried to let go of Mario's hands because I was afraid to be seen by my two children

"Please don't take it off, just for a second." - Mario, right behind my ear.

I nodded at the corner of my lip as my heart suddenly beat unruffled

"Had Mario, the kids would have seen" I said again trying to ask Mario to let go of his arms

"I Miss you Diamond." Mario said softly.

I took a deep breath hearing his words. So that I turned my body, and now we face the front so close

"Don't lure me in with that phrase. I'm afraid I'm losing consciousness and hearing your longing words again".

Mario smiled at my words and it made me turn my back again

Just as Mario was about to hug me back, the voices of Meka and Bobby ran towards the back

And the two of them immediately sat down at the dining table with plates in front of them

I who had finished my cooking immediately put fried rice and eggs into my two children's dishes and they both immediately scooped the fried rice without offering Mario again

And it made me and Mario look at each other, and then we both smiled

"Why not be offered? ask Mario who made both my children realize and immediately grinned

Immediately I got some fried rice for Mario and gave it to him who sat next to my children. I sat down next to them and the four of us ate together

An hour later, after dinner we sat outside the shophouse, looking at the busy road. And my two children seemed to have started to get sleepy, as seen from those who began to yawn

"Let me take them" said Mario as I intended to lift Bobby

I had no time to answer, Mario had lifted Bobby from my sling and immediately took him upstairs

Before long Mario had come down again and lifted Meka who was also asleep in the outside chair

I looked towards Ibrahim and his two friends who were still in the study

"We're here, brother?" said Ibrahim who I answered with a nod of the head

Then Mario and I walked out and sat back where we were

It began to feel awkward between us when we sat down

Only the breath of each of us could be heard

"Mario I....."

"Intan me ....."

Because we both said the sentences together, Mario and I both smiled stiffly and threw our faces to the side

"You go first" Mario told me after a few seconds of silence. I shook my head

"You go first, what do you say"

I heard Mario take a deep breath. Then he turned his head towards me, and lifted the chair he was sitting on and placed it right in front of me

"Intan, the purpose I came here from this afternoon to see you until this moment I have not come home, because I want to propose to you again"

My mouth immediately gaped upon hearing Mario's words

Then I shook my head while smiling in disbelief at his words

"Don't joke you Mario"

"I'm serious Intan. I'm not kidding. I'm here because I want to reapply you, and I hope that you don't reject my proposal"

Back I laughed when I heard the words from Mario

Without me noticing, Mario immediately crouched down in front of me and immediately grabbed my hand tightly while looking me in the eye

I'm serious Intan. I never "joked with my words. Have you ever seen me joke with my words? never is it?"

Many times I gulped my saliva because suddenly my esophagus felt dry when I saw Mario staring in my direction with his earnest words

"Please Mario, I realize I miss you. But that doesn't mean I still love you" I replied softly

My hand held by Mario, I intend to pull but it turns out Mario's grip is still tight on my hand

Mario just smiled when I said that

"You're still an ugly liar Intan. You can't lie. Your lie is so bad. I think after almost two years of our separation, you're good at lying. But it turns out, you're still my old girl. My honest heart, which every word he spoke was what it was, clean, pure from the heart"

I could only be speechless hearing Mario's assessment of me. I said it with a serious face. But apparently, Mario can still read that I lied

I don't know how else I convinced Mario to never love me again and stop expecting me. Because I know, it seems like we can't unite because our gap is so deep and so steep

"Seriously Mario, I'm not lying. I don't love you anymore"

Once again I saw the grinning smile on Mario's lips

"It is painful indeed, when you have to pretend to stay away, when you are almost destroyed for holding back the longing"

"Never lie to yourself. Maybe someone else you can lie to, but not me"

"If you say you don't love me anymore and don't want me anymore, say it by looking me in the eye, not by looking down"

As powerful as I can, I dare to look into Mario's eyes. Although actually my chest is pounding

I don't love you anymore Mario" I said in a trembling voice

Mario immediately released his hand on my hand. Then I saw Mario covering his face with both palms

Shortly after, Mario opened his hands that had covered his face, then he quickly pulled my nape and immediately devoured my lips

I kept trying to push Mario's chest, so he let go of his kiss from my lips. But it turned out that he couldn't, Mario was too strong to pull the nape and press my head

By closing my eyes, I let Mario continue to devour my lips

Until finally, Mario released his ferocious kiss when he heard that I sobbed