My husband no longer touched me
He's not a bastard, Mom!

All the way I cursed my mother incessantly. Why would he take my money?

Fortunately, there was money in my pocket. Good for the needs of the days.

But not enough to model a stall. How to turn a little money into a lot?

I feel the pain in my stomach. Is it not time to give birth?

Am I too tired ....

I hold the rest of the money a little it crossed the idea for me to make small businesses sell food in its style.

And the result is I canister for my labor costs later.

Three days later, Beni came home. Go home drunk. Little memory is still coming.

Geck!

Geck!

Geck!

"Clearned! Open the door,"

I saw the clock on the wall at 02:00. Just disturb my sleep.

With a step I opened the door.

"Yes, just a minute, Mas."

"Last long!" snapped it.

The smell of alcohol in the air.

"Please rock me," he said.

I grabbed a balsam and a coin in my closet drawer.

Mas Beni was lying on the sofa. I was confused which side I sat on. Yeah, right?

Bizarrely. Kok, so keki himself.

"Ribet is very, you are." He pulled my arm. Made me sit next to him.

Finished scraping his body. He sat down and patted the sofa telling me to sit next to him.

Beni gently defended me. What wind is there?

I dare not look him in the eyes. Then he lifted my chin. And ....

The cup!

The lips of two people. Eh, wait! Has Beni forgotten and forgiven me?

Slowly his hand shrewdly unbuttoned the negligee on my chest one by one. His breath is hunting.

My heart almost came out of its place. Deg-degan like on the first night. Aishn .... Wonderfully.

Me and Mas Beni making out to each other. When the atmosphere warms up.

Aghhh!

Bugh!

I fell because Mas Beni pushed me.

"Damn!" his screeches.

Mas Beni squeezed his hair in frustration.

"I won't touch you, Laras." She cried. "Which guy fucked you, huh?"

I just looked down with tears.

I knew he couldn't resist his desire to make love. A man's instincts are pent up for months where he will stand.

I was still sitting on the floor in a limp state because of his attitude just now.

Beni got up from his seat. He's headed for the bathroom.

Whum!

That door blow scared me. I immediately ran to the room and locked the door.

My body sank into tears of regret. No use of this is too late. Now remains the debris.

What kind of marriage is this?

I continue to curse this despicable and dirty self.

****

Nine months later ....

I've calculated the date on the calendar. It feels like I don't hold a dime. Afraid that my baby was born I have no charge.

There's one way that I have to borrow money from a mobile bank. Fuck the installments!

The day awaited also arrived. I feel great heartburn. And give out signs of childbirth.

And ....

Oek ... Oek ...

A baby boy has been born into the world healthy and safe. The one I wanted to kill first was apparently a handsome little angel.

I gave him the name Ocean.

In accordance with Mas Beni's promise he will not finance other needs. It's all right I can!

Welcome to the world of handsome! Mama will take care of you.

****

The days I spent without a husband. Husband? There's kok. It's just not functioning.

40 Days passed ....

The ocean looks a lot like Mas Ferdi. It is visible from the nose, large eyeballs, white skin and plump body.

Unlike Faisal and Cahya they have brown skin like Mas Beni and me. Much different, isn't it?

Mas Beni did not want to touch and carry him. Although the ocean is crying loudly.

I'm sad? No. gabe. Let what he wants Beni. I'm sure as time goes by it must have changed.

The presence of the Ocean in the middle of the wheel people are busy guessing who the father is. Because they've heard of my affair with Mas Ferdi before.

"Who does the baby look like?"

"Kok, don't you look like Beni?

"Pretty baby. How is it so different from his father?"

"Clearly different. Not his father,"

And many more people around me.

It is different when inside the house.

"Let's keep that kid quiet!"

Beni covered her ears with a pillow.

I who was still washing clothes rushed to the Ocean in the room.

"Well, you can hold her for a minute."

He turned towards me with his eyes twitching. Then he got up from his sleep and walked up to me.

"Whatdidyou say? Carrying the bastard?!"

Weepy!

"No, not,"

My heart throbbed pain hearing Mas Beni's words.

"Please don't hate this kid, Mom. He doesn't understand anything."

I carried the Ocean by fondling it.

"Did you remember, Laras? We have to do a DNA test" said Mas Beni.

Suddenly my breath was closed.

"No DNA testing needed, Mom. Seen from the Ocean alone is different from his brothers."

I resigned ....

"Oh, fine. You can leave my house right now!"

My body is limp as if it is boneless.

With all my strength I try to support this body so as not to be unsteady.

"Mas don't be selfish! Look at our kids as kids. Not happy to treat me like this? Lives never give to me. I'm patient and patient."

My voice trembles. "Let me here, Mom. I'm sincere even though I never make a living,"

Aarghh!

Brak!

Mas Beni walked up to me and kicked the table.

Geck!

Geck!

Geck!

"Excuse me ...,"

Alhamdulillah. Who is the guest coming?