My husband no longer touched me
Fall out?

Was this news happy or sad? I'm rattled. W-god, is this real?

I dragged this leg forcefully away immediately home. I think my joints are limp. Who I told you first. Ferdi or Beni?

****

Today the shop looks quiet. I look forward to the arrival of Mas Ferdi. At 13:00 should have stopped for lunch or just ordered coffee.

Brums ....

The yellow truck was parked across the street. Yeah, it's Mas Ferdi!

A smile on his brown face.

"Hi, Brother. Oh, it's beautiful!" greet my mistress.

"Yes, here. It just so happens, Mom." Kuremas ends my negligee. I'm nervous to tell you, aren't I?

"Eat as usual, Sister."

"Ready."

Finish eating Mas Ferdi lit a cigarette. I approach it ....

"Mas ... I'm pregnant," I said shaking.

Without thinking about Mas Ferdi's reaction, "Kok, can you? Why get pregnant!"

"I don't know either, Mommy."

My tears flowed down my heart.

"Female tol**!" his screeches.

He stood smoking cigarettes violently. Turned it off.

I was surprised by his words. He never said anything rude all this time. Why now?

"Should have been, I'm happy. Not yell at me. Huhuhoo!"

"Don't you, just the baby ..," said Mas Ferdi lirih. Throw money for me.

My eyes glared in disbelief so all this time he lied to want to be with me?

"But this is our baby, Mom. I promise we'll---,"

"Allah! This is not what I want, Baras! Put the baby down, if I don't come here tomorrow. Don't expect to see you again."

After threatening Mas Ferdi went and turned on his truck.

My body slumped down unable to withstand the pain. Yeah, God. You punish me this way.

Achaghfirullah ...!

Mas Beni I'm sorry I betrayed you. It's your fault for never accompanying me either.

Arghhc ....

Mom loves you, son. But this is not the way your presence is in your mother's womb.

Regret it's too late, but ....

I hurried to close the shop. I have to go to the market to buy young herbs and pineapples.

All along the journey I thought was just this baby having to fall! He ruined my happiness with Ferdi.

Will the little thing in my womb give up?

I don't drink jamu bottle cap packaging "Miss Menir" and eat piece by piece young pineapple for contraction.

The second the wall clock rotated but, this damn baby didn't show that he was going to come out of my womb.

Oh, apparently this little fetus is challenging me huh, watch out for you!

I took the medicine from the bottle again.

Gluey!

Gluey!

Fast as lightning has moved in my esophagus.

Ah, crap!

Pranks!

Bottle of old herbs smashed to pieces.

Astaghfirullah ....

Why is it like this? I have to abort him. Whatever way! I paced in front of the mirror. Holding my stomach and ...

An abortion?

Yeah, that's it!

****

Morning greets my dirty soul. I have an idea.

I quickly took my two children to my mother's place. I put them there.

I have to see Kamila's midwife.

At the place of practice ....

"Don't be crazy, Mom!" said Mrs Kamila. He refused my request. While holding a pressure detection device.

"Come, Mom. I was forced and didn't want this baby" I said desperately.

"Sorry, Mom. I can't. It violates the code of conduct as a health care worker."

"Whatever I pay. The origin of this baby is gone," I said.

"can't. Sorry, Mom's out of my room!"

I stood up with a shunt step. My eyes did not stop crying.

I left the practice house of Ms. Kamila.

My phone is vibrating in my pants pocket.

"Hurry over here. I'm in front of your shop."

Fill in an SMS message from Mas Ferdi.

I don't want to see him right now. God, can I disappear?

Better not see him first. That bastard makes me dizzy.

Do you love your mom, son? If he leaves this womb. I talked to my own womb.

Aghhh!