SHE'S YOUR MOTHER, NOT MY WIFE.
HOLLOWLY,

I've been lying here a few days stiff. There were some people who came in voices that I already knew. But the one I was waiting for didn't come.

'Reza, have you given up? Have you released me and our son, why didn't you come to see me?'

The pain that had been a friend these past few months, was diverted into a void. It didn't hurt too much, it hurt to be isolated by the person most expected.

'Son, you must be born safe. Grow healthy and become a good human being. Son, Mama knows you hear all the words of everyone who comes. You know, son, the people who come to see Mama are the people that Mama often hurts. Mom, send a message, son. You have to learn from them, despite being hurt repeatedly by your mother. They still love us and care about us, son.'

This helpless body, makes me even more unhinged. Sound and touch I can't do. I tried hard to make a sound. At least if I can say there's one hope for me.

The doctor said there was no hope for me to recover. But it doesn't matter, because I just want my son to survive. The problem is how I can make a sound or move my hand. I have to leave my son to someone. I want him to be a good boy, warm-hearted, sincere and sincere in life. I don't want him to fall into the same abyss as me. Envy of others, greedy and arrogant, that made my life ruined like this.

As a child, I miss the love of my family. My mother married again and went with her new family. My father was there he left me with my mother for another woman. I was left behind by those who should have harbored for me. Every time I thought back to their treatment of me, it made my heart sick. The pain I felt turned into ambition that led me to the pit of destruction. I'm lonely, I miss their warm embrace. They forgot me and threw me away like I never existed. But they hugged their new family warmly, why not me? What's my fault with them?

I want all that, happiness, a warm embrace, a whole family! I try so hard to get the attention of anyone, to be the center of attention.

But it only creates that sense of satisfaction for a moment. But the happiness I craved was not at all felt.

Right now I can only feel the movement of my fetus inside the stomach. I'm sure he's bored there, kick after kick he feels lilu in my stomach.

I want to wet my throat, it hurts when I force a sound.

****

"According to the last test, his condition is fine. There's just no development. Response shown only through tears."

I nodded, "Is the fetus okay, Doc?."

"For the time being good, Ma'am. If the vital organs of the mother fetus are still functioning normally, God's insha does not affect the growth of the fetus."

I sighed, there was a little relief in my heart. If one of the two of them still had a chance, it would have been more than enough.

"Would it last until childbirth, Doc?. Seeing from the condition of Clara who was like, this." I said.

"We always monitor the vitals of his mother, Ma'am. As long as nothing is out of the question, it shouldn't be a problem until birth." check the tools on Clara's body.

I was horrified at once pity to see him lying on his feet, must have felt uncomfortable. Especially during the third trimester of pregnancy. My back and waist feel uncomfortable to me. Especially for him, who had been lying down for more than a week.

"Everything is under control, Ma'am." reported the doctor when he finished checking the vital tool.

"Maybe, Ma'am. But it must be careful, because if stalled will hurt his lungs. Patients can not respond to anything other than tears, so we install a hose NGT to help help eat and drink patients. If you want to be given a drink, I will ask the nurse to accompany you. Fear of patients responding." explained the Doctor.

I'm asserting.

The doctor came out and before long a nurse came to my side to give Clara a drink.

"Let me, ma'am." asked Sister.

I refused it, "No Sus, let me just. Sisters can help monitor yes, fear there is an invisible response. I'm afraid Clara's gonna stall."

He's nodding.

"Clara, drink a little. You must be really thirsty. Your throat is also dry. Help swallow a little yes, you have to respond. You want to heal, you have to heal for your child." feed the water with a little teaspoon. I was scared, afraid to hurt him.

"I'm sorry, if it's painful or uncomfortable Clara." I'm sorry.

I saw her throat swallow slowly, I glanced at the nurse. Sister nodded.

I continued to give him a drink. He began to move his lips even though it was still very thin.

My sister and I repeatedly looked at each other, to make sure whether or not my vision was correct.

I am grateful, at least there was a response from him.

"Oh yes, the sex of your daughter Loch. Must be your rich beauty. When he grows up, he will play with Edwina. Our children will play together, Clara. Mikola, your baby, my son. One day we'll walk to the island that Edward got when the project was last time." feed the water back, he responded.

"You know Clara, the island is beautiful. The fish and corals are still awake. The starfish and jellyfish in the aquarium in my house, the results I found myself there. So quickly wake up, give birth to your child healthy. We're all going on vacation to the island. You must love it, the sunset is so beautiful." My story.

The tip of her lips shook, I panicked a little. But sister calmed me down. He explained that it was a good response.

I kept trying to give him stimuli that made him want to get up.

"Oh yes, Clara. Mikola's been good at Loch's talk. He even loved Edwina. While staying at my house, he was fighting over Vienna with Edward." I laughed. "Eat him, quickly gave birth to a beautiful sister for Mikola. I'm sure he'll sing it. Remember Clara, your life is long. Don't you want to be happy and have a family? And then you must rise. You owe me a lot, took Mas Reza and separated Edward from his father. You repeatedly tried to destroy my household and Mas Gaga's. When you forget, you don't want to apologize?. I won't forgive you if you don't apologize to me yourself." I'm proud.

Now her lower lips were shaking, her tears were flowing. I patted her hand gently, "Hayu dong, hold my hand. You have to kiss my hand, Clara." I ordered.

* *N**asogastric tube (NGT). Its function is to supply food and drink to patients who are not allowed to swallow, due to medical conditions*