The Untold Story
Is This Happiness?

- B's PoV--

*2003: Ubud-Bali*

Tonight, among the hundreds and perhaps even thousands of trees that planted their roots in the land of the gods, I was standing on the balcony of my hotel room, look at the sky that looks gloomy because there is not a single star shining there. And as always, when the thirst for witnessing the light of the stars was insatiable because of the cloud-covered sky, I just had to put my hand on my chest while closing my eyes, because that's where I carved the stars so that they would always be close to my heart.

"Why are you hiding again tonight, stars in the sky? At least comfort me, your loyal admirer," I murmured in such a soft voice.

Me, a poor girl with a broken heart. My lover... I don't know where he is at the moment. He should have stood here with me, hugging me tenderly while looking up at the stars. It was he who should have made the promise before the Lord with me in that Church.

But instead, he chose to leave. He chose to let me go and hoped that I would have more happiness than he could give.

"You're leaving... And you let other men occupy your position. He even kissed me so possessively as if I really belonged to him. Aren't you jealous?" I muttered once more while touching my lips.

As the sentence ended, my daydream flew back into the air. The daydream brought me back to what happened a few hours ago, when we were still in Jakarta.

"Now you've started enjoying my kiss, baby," Aditya whispered in my ear. The words came out of his lips seconds after the moment of holy kiss in the church ended.

If only he knew that I was just imagining Indra's face. I imagine that Indra did it, kissing me so longingly.

"He didn't even notice it. She thought I was really lulled by her kiss, until she seemed so happy" I said alone with a wry laugh, as if I was mocking Aditya.

The man looked very happy at the time. Whether it was something real or purposely made by her, but I could only find a sincere look of happiness as I quietly stared at her neutrality throughout the reception and inside the helicopter, she said, before the iron-plated frame flew us. It is still clear in my memory how he expressed himself as he waved his hand while giving a smile to our four parents who accompanied usher and stood on the edge of the Helipad.

Yes, after finishing holding our wedding reception held at the Grand Hyatt Hotel, the foreign man who has now legally become my husband immediately took me for a honeymoon to the Island of the Gods by using his personal helicopter. I who knew nothing of this plan could only resign, as he took my hand and led me to the place where the helicopter that would take us was. Still with a mermaid-modeled wedding dress so snugly attached to my body, she took me aboard her helicopter.

I then wondered in my heart, is Aditya really happy with all this frenzy? Is he happy with the strange marriage we just had? Isn't there no love between us and therefore there should be no reason for him to be happy? Why does it all feel so natural?

But the other side of my heart rejects all of those possibilities. My memory of agreeing with the rejection then thrust out pieces of events about how the man came back so cold, silent, and unreadable when there was no one near us.

If so, what does that smile and look at her eyes that look so pure mean? What underlies his happiness?

Is he happy to have me? Was he happy that the union of two families became a bridge to open up the possibility of a bigger company?

Or is... Is he really happy to feel victorious over me? Is she happy that she made me go through a marriage I didn't want?

Yes, that's the only logical reason in an absurd situation like now. Aditya is a rich man. The addition of treasures was nothing new and surprising to him.

There is only one reason that makes a man happy. Bre*gs*k men like Aditya certainly feel happy or even very happy when he sees his prey (me) suffering.

"What are you doing with your open wedding dress? Come inside! It's pretty cold tonight. It might rain soon. I don't want to be bothered with a wife who can't take care of herself." A voice from a man I didn't want to hear, went back on the air.

Without answering his words, I twisted my body and swung my steps towards the hotel room he had reserved for the two of us. I continued walking and stopped in front of the dressing table located on the left side of the room.

I carefully prepared to remove the entire hairpin that filled my head. One by one I removed the tongs without anyone helping.

Don't expect that Aditya will care about little things like this. Let's just say that

the twelve o'clock bell had rang, and the man had now returned to his original form.

After my hair was completely broken, I also began to clean my face and remove the makeup attached there. As I continued to struggle with the facial cleansing liquid, I then imagined, if I were such an ugly duckling that turned into a swan due to sheer makeup, I would certainly be happy tonight, she said, because I can assure you that the man will not touch me. However, all that is just my imagination is in vain, because the pervert is certainly not possible to carelessly choose someone who can be used as prey.

After cleaning myself in the bathroom, removing the wedding dress that had been attached, then replacing it with a pajama, I stepped towards where our bed was. My eyes had looked at the figure of Aditya who had already laid his body there.

Without much drama and talk, I put my body down and lay down beside her. I positioned myself not too close to him and slept my back to the man.

To be honest, I just want to fall asleep quickly. I want the lord of dreams to take me to his realm. I'm not ready to give myself up to him tonight, or maybe forever I'll never be ready.

I almost lost my consciousness. I almost found peace in the sleep I was just about to enjoy. Suddenly... I felt a heavy hand grab my body and make me become distracted.

"You don't mean to just miss tonight, do you?" I heard Aditya whispering in my ear back and my eyes opened.

There was not a word out of these lips, even to reject his attitude I felt like I had no energy. I choose to cry in silence.

"I've told you, baby, that I'll have you. Tonight all my curiosity about the beauty of your body will be answered," he continued as he touched other parts of my body.

My tears grew as his hands began to open one by one the pajama buttons I was wearing and began to guerrilla touch the sensitive upper part of my body. I immediately felt dirty from being touched by him.

Unsatisfied with our position, the man's rapid and stirring breaths turned my body and faced him. However, even though we were facing each other now, he chose not to look me in the face. He was busy enjoying the dishes in front of him. Tracing my body with her lips and giving me gentle kisses that made me even more fed up.

I don't know why I didn't avoid it, but I don't want to serve it either. I really am like a dead man. And maybe my soul really is dead.

Now he has almost completely taken control of my body. Praise for praise does not forget he gave for what he was feeling. Aditya has seen it all, because I really am innocent by now.

Satisfied toying with his new toy, the man then intended to fondle my lips. I thought that he was going to smite me violently and passionately, but I was wrong. Tonight, he treated me gently and very carefully, as if I were a shatterable porcelain.

I tried to shift my gaze when the Devil opened his eyes and looked at me with longing. The tears started to flow more and more as I saw that he started to strip off his clothes.

I knew something was going to happen tonight between us. Sooner or later, Aditya will continue to impose his will on me. Maybe I just need to learn to turn off this feeling so I won't be constantly hurt.

After he finished taking everything off, the lewd demon again kissed my lips. He seemed to be indifferent to the tears that kept flowing from the corner of his wife's eyes. The man was only intending to make me a tool of satisfaction. And tonight he proved it.

I'm not flinching. I kept on sculpting and letting him do whatever he wanted to do to my body, until....

"Did I marry a corpse?" I heard Aditya speak in a deep voice.

"You're right Aditya.. I've been dead since Indra left me" I said in my heart. I have no intention of serving him.

"Say Bellatrix, can't you play your part well tonight?" Aditya retreated his body and focused on looking into my eyes. I was still clamoring and trying to take my eyes off. I acted as if there was no one in the room but myself.

"Look at me Bellatrix!" Roughly Aditya pulled my chin and forced me to look into his eyes. At first glance I found there was a glint of anger on the man's gaze.

"My answer!!" The man raised the volume of his voice until I gasped. I really didn't like it when someone snapped at me and he just did it.

"Take what you want to take. No need to care about what I do." I calmly answered the man, turning my eyes back.

Aditya took a moment. I don't know what he's thinking.

"What other game are you playing right now?" After being fixated for a while on hearing my quiet words, the man again voiced out in a cold tone.

This time I will not speak again. I've already stated my point clearly. I'm sure he's not too stupid to catch that I don't care what he does to me.

I could feel that Aditya was still looking at me and waiting for an answer. Seconds by second passed and still not a word came out of my lips to reply.

"You know my wife..." Aditya puts emphasis on my wife's word. He then brought his face closer to me until our eyes met.

"You're very... It's disgusting...." The man then stood up. Wearing all his clothes and stepping out to our door.

Brakk!!!

I heard the sound of the room door being closed. Quickly, I pulled out the blanket and covered my unwrapped body. I held the blanket tightly and cried loudly in the room.

"This is what you want.. Indra?? Is this what you call happiness??" I was still on the bed and buried my face in the pillow while still shedding tears.

No one can understand how I feel. No one can understand the pain. Just me. Alone.

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Happy reading!