Giving Birth to My Brother
3. Knowing Facts

That afternoon, Elin was again examined by a doctor. He had a knock, but it wasn't fatal enough that he only needed to be hospitalized for one more night. He had been getting a treatment room because all night he was in front of the Sinta room. However, Elin could not rest at all in her room.

"Sus, can I borrow the phone?" elin asked when a nurse visited her room to check on some of the patients in the room.

"Oh yeah. Sure." Sure." The nurse held out her phone to Elin and walked to the patient next to Elin.

Elin typed in a contact on the nurse's phone screen. He can't work today and he has to tell Galang, his boss. His phone hasn't been found yet, somehow the fate of his belongings that were in the car at the time of yesterday's accident, he doesn't know.

"May I use the phone for a second, Sus?" elin asked for permission.

"Yes. Please." The nurse smiled as she changed the patient's infusion.

"Thank you." Elin also pressed the dial button on the number Galang. Luckily, he remembered Galang's contact number so he could contact him immediately.

"Hello, who is this?"

"It's Elin, sir." Elin bit her lip. He always felt strange when calling Galang as Pak because they only differ by a few years.

"Oh, Elin? You changed the new number? Why don't you come in today?"

"sorry. I had an accident yesterday afternoon. So I can't go in today."

"You're in an accident? Over where? How are you doing? What hospital are you in?" asked Galang with a worried tone.

"I'm not papa, sir. My hand was slightly scratched, the rest I was fine. I'd like to ask permission for a few days not to enter, sir. I'll do the script at home" Elin said. Not only is he sick, he is also grieving because baby Sinta died.

"Where are you? I'll be here any minute."

"Ehm, I really don't papa. You don't have to come here" said Elin unkindly.

"Elin, I'm worried about you. I was outside. Have you eaten? Is someone keeping you there?"

Elin bit her lip again. He's alone. No one accompanied him, but he did not need either. He was just a little sick, he thought.

"Say me. What hospital are you in?" asked Galang with a demanding tone.

"Main Medical Hospital, Sir. I'm in ward Melati room number 14" replied Elin while reading her room number listed near the entrance.

"OKAY. You wait there. Have you eaten?"

"Already, sir," replied Elin lying. He couldn't swallow food last night. Even if he is hungry, he has no taste at all.

"Yes already. I'll be there in a minute."

"Thank you, Sus." Elin returned the phone to the nurse.

"Either. Hopefully the team will come soon, Ma'am. Kasian from yesterday had no relatives."

Elin stunned. Well, he's only stayed three with Ariel and Sinta all this time. So, when Sinta is sick, surely Ariel will choose to take care of his wife. Elin took a deep breath, wondering what was going on in Sinta's room right now. Sinta already knew that her baby had died, but did Sinta already know that her womb had also been removed?

Elin rubbed her face in a huff. He exhaled many times as he recalled yesterday's terrible accident. He also remembered how much blood was in Sinta's body. Had he gone home after lunch yesterday, the accident might not have happened. Elin just remembered, after eating, he intended to invite Sinta to stop by to buy a new laptop. They were not on their way home, but they were heading to an electronic shopping mall that was quite far from home.

And that's why Ariel was angry with him.

***

"Will I get pregnant again?" sinta asked with both eyes shaking. She had been crying since morning, and that afternoon, though she heard the painful fact, she had run out of tears. "Doctors lie, right? Mas! The doctor lied to me, right?"

"Sin, relax. Your condition is severe enough that it's the best option to save you" Ariel said, trying to calm his wife.

Sinta shook her head, her sadness due to the loss of a baby was increased to many times. He would no longer be a perfect figure in front of Ariel! He's defective. She could not give offspring to her husband. And it's very painful Sinta's heart.

"You're focused on getting well, honey. Don't think about it too much, okay? I want you to calm down" said Ariel weakly. He asked Sinta to be calmer when her own heart was not.

"I should give birth next month, Mom. And now ... Why is all this happening to me?" ask Sinta lirih.

"We have to be sincere, hm?" Ariel rubbed Sinta's cheeks reddened by the scratches of the wound. "We have no other choice. We can only be sincere, Sin."

"I might be willing to take care of my dead baby, Mom. But .. but I won't be able to get pregnant again. I .. Can't love you baby." Sinta looked at her crying husband. She knew Ariel was craving a baby. They are planning to have at least two children. They've prepared the names, the nursery with all the baby equipment. They have made special savings for their children. But everything feels impossible.

"It's important you're healthy, Sin. I just want to see you heal and get home. I don't care if we can't have children." Ariel tries to convince Sinta that she is okay.

"I'm not perfect, Mom. I'm disabled. You still want the same handicapped woman as me?" Sinta let go of Ariel's hand. He tilted his body slowly, but he still felt excruciating pain. He can't face Ariel right now. He feels so broken.

"Darling, why are you asking me that?" ask Ariel. He moved to sit on the edge of the bed Sinta then lowered his body to be able to kiss Sinta's cheek. "I love you so much. I really don't care, the important thing is that we can stay together, honey."

Sinta closed her eyes tightly as she felt a gentle kiss on her cheek twice. He could also feel Ariel's tears dripping down his face. It hurt him, he always wanted Ariel to be happy, but now he's this broken.

"Honey," called Ariel while gently hugging Sinta's body and rubbing her back several times. "I know you're sad and depressed. I'm sad too, but we can get through this together. You're the same me. Okay well? I love you."

Sinta sobs back. He wanted to pretend to be asleep because he could not stare at Ariel's grievous face at this moment. However, he was too sad not to cry anymore. He rubbed his face and looked at Ariel. She looked at her husband's dark eyes. Gently, she stroked the husband's cheek.

"Mas, you know I'm not perfect anymore. I will not be able to love you descendants until anytime. What would your parents say about me now? I. .. I know they want to have a grandchild soon. But, I can't. I am not a worthy wife to you. I thought, you should find another woman who is much more perfect than me, Mas."