I Don'T Want To Be Cinderella #1
14. I wish I could stop the time for a while
Carnival, pov.
I looked at my parents in disbelief. How could Papah say so coldly and so forcefully as to tell me to decide Kirana.
“You know who the Santoso family are, right? Although their assets are still under us, but they control the property sector in most parts of Java, and have considerable power in East and Central Java.”
As I expected all back to business matters, as if I was just an asset to expand the business as well as power. All this time I never complained about knowing from the beginning, and all that wealth and power would come back for me to enjoy, but now it's different … there is someone more important to me than even wealth and power.
“Today we have had it all .. wealth is also power.” I said after a moment of silence. “Even our family is included in the list of the top 5 influential entrepreneurs in Indonesia, so what else is Papah looking for? Want to be number 1? After that what? No 1 in Asia? Keep what? No 1 in the world? How many times do I have to get married to make my dream come true? Or Papah will sell Candra and Arletha too?”
“Raka!” Papah was angry to hear my words.
“Why, Pah? Now even Papah seems to sell the happiness of Raka for wealth and power.”
“Papah doing that for the future is also your happiness!”
I was silent, it felt sad to hear parents as if they knew what our happiness is without asking.
“What do Papah and Mamah know, what are the ideals of Raka, Candra or Arletha?”
They were silent to my simple question.
“During this time, we never once asked what we want? What are our ideals? When Raka or Candra fought outside, neither Papah nor Mamah ever asked why we fought right? Yes, Papah of course cleared up the matter quickly, got us out of the police station and gave the money to the confessions to get our opponents to shut up regardless of whether we were guilty or not, and shut the mouth of journalists for the good name of Papah and also the company.”
I looked at the two parents who were silent, looking surprised to see me express what had been hidden.
“What does Papah and Mamah know, if I like design, Candra really likes programming, and Arletha, she's like me who prefers architecture over psychology?” They still kept silent making me smile. “As I suspected .. Mamah and papah do not know anything about us, other than how much money is transferred into our account every month.”
I saw Mamah looking at us with her eyes. I took a deep breath trying to calm down my slight disappointment.
“During this, we were just like chess pieces whose steps were set and determined where we should step. Who we should be friends with, where we go to school, what majors we should take while in college. You don't care if we love our partner or not, are we happy. All you care about is what profit can be had if we get married.”
“Caraka!” Papah exclaimed that he did not accept my words, but that was the truth.
For a moment, me and Papah stared at each other. Mamah held Papah's arm as if telling him to calm down again. For a while there was still tension in the look of Papah's eyes before returning to look calm even though his eyes were still looking sharp.
“32 years not once have I denied any desire Papah and Mamah. For 32 years also I did not have my life completely, all I did by following all the wishes of Papah and Mamah.”
I looked at my parents who were silent to my words. I tried to catch my breath to regain control of my emotions before I said again.
“This is the first time I've begged her parents as a child .. let me decide for myself who I love and will marry. That'sallthatis. The rest I will follow the will of Papah and Mamah. I've given up my life and dreams all this time, so at least don't erase my future dreams.”
For the first time I have spoken out what I want, all this time I will just be silent and follow all their decisions for my life.
I hope for once that they grant my request, to make my own life a decision .. Only this once, because I could not have if I had to choose between my parents and the woman I love.
Is it selfish to want to have both?
****
Orgasm, pov.
Boss Sir: Did you come in this morning?
Kirana: Yes
Kirana: Hmmm .. seems like something serious. Did Big Boss give you an ultimatum to cross you from KK?
Boss Sir: Hahaha, no but it seems like they are currently thinking about the idea.
Kirana: Better the Boss quickly move your savings and deposits before they block everything.
Boss Sir: Hahaha, very good idea. Did I just replace it in your name?
Kirana: Good idea!
Boss Sir: Hahaha .. alright I will do it.
Kirana: Tell me if you have done it, I will leave here and disappear.
Boss Sir: Hey, if it's like that I won't get anything.
Kirana: Don't worry I'll leave the red one, so the boss can learn to be an online ojek.
Boss Sir: The red guy hasn't even paid off.
Caroline : Hahaha …
Kirana: Boss, I have to turn off the phone, Mr. Edi's eyes have already let out a fire looking at me.
Boss Sir: Hahaha, alright .. until later in the afternoon.
Kirana: Okay!
“I'll turn it off.” I quickly turned off my phone after realizing that Mr. Eddy was watching me from earlier with fiery eyes.
What does the boss want to talk to me about? Has he spoken to his parents? Ahhh! Because the message from the Boss made it difficult for me to concentrate on the rest of my work hours and hope that work hours will end soon.
When my work hours ended quickly I headed to the Bull Field Park. A park not far from the hotel, I just had to cross over to get there.
Banteng Field Park is wide enough for the size of a park so it is not wrong if this park becomes one of the favorite places for residents of the capital to jog, or just gather with friends and family. The afternoon was not so crowded, probably because of the workday, though, so there are only a few people who can be seen jogging on athletic tracks and around the West Irian liberation monument where some people are photographed under the 35-meter-high monument.
I walked through the walls full of Heroic quotes that burned the spirit of nationalism, while the place I was aiming for was the amphitheater. A quite famous spot here, there are steps that can accommodate many people where a tree is deliberately planted in the middle of the stands, there are steps that can accommodate many people, but unfortunately the place turned out to be quite crowded by teenagers who are cool taking pictures.
I walked back through the amplitheater, not far from there was a large artificial lake. Like an amplitheater, there are steps here that can accommodate many people, but this place is not as crowded there.
I took my phone to send a message about my current location, so that the Boss wouldn't have to go around looking for me.
Kirana: I'm in front of the lake.
Boss : Okay, wait a minute I'll be there.
I smiled reading the message. Sitting in front of the lake enjoying an afternoon while reading a novel, I waited for him, and slowly began to dissolve in the world of fiction until finally without feeling the sound of adhan magrib along with someone sitting beside me. His long legs sloped past several steps, his hands became the pedestal of his body that leaned back casually, his face looking up with his eyes closed. Set against the backdrop of an aging afternoon sky, the scene beside me looks like the cast of a fictional character I just read.
For a moment I was blown away by the sight until he opened his eyes and looked at me. My chest rippled, my heart pounding. How could my heart not be mad if we were stared at like that by a fictional man who seemed to live in a real world who smiled gently as he said,
“We pray magrib first.”
I smiled back and then nodded. He stood up first to stick out his hand which I hesitated and ashamedly welcomed. After helping me stand up he didn't let go of his hand making my heart even more crazy. Along the way we joined hands in silence, there were no words spoken from the lips that only showed a smile under the twilight sky of Jakarta.
I hope time will stop for a while, let me enjoy this togetherness longer, because I know something has happened that might bring me back to reality.
*****